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Newest Member: Puddleoftears (44334)

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User Topic: There's storm brewing
Lovedyoumore
♀ Member
Member # 35593
Default  Posted: 5:33 PM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Great. The OW is now a named tropical storm. Well, if she turns into a hurricane, how appropriate, a big blow with no regrets.

What's in a name? One of the biggest triggers I have. We do not use her given name, ever. Anybody else get a flipped tummy when you hear the AP name?

[This message edited by Lovedyoumore at 5:52 PM, September 13th (Friday)]


Me 52
WH 52
Married 30+ years
Together trying to R

I tell people I am tired but really my heart is broken and I am sad.


Posts: 1405 | Registered: May 2012 | From: Southern, bless your heart
Doubts
♀ Member
Member # 40209
Cool  Posted: 6:00 PM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't like to play the guess who I saw today game anymore!! I always visualize the OW. Then I have to giggle to myself.

Posts: 59 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: CA
courageous
♀ Member
Member # 34477
Default  Posted: 6:07 PM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes. My counselor had the same name as OW. It was hard at first but I was determined not to let her have ANY power over me.


Me: BW (35)
Him: ExWH (31) EA/PA with MOW coworker
Married 9 years, 2 small kids
dday 3/12/2011 divorced fall 2012

My ipad does a lot of crazy typos.


Posts: 624 | Registered: Jan 2012
momoftana
♀ Member
Member # 17383
Default  Posted: 10:12 AM, September 16th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes, her name is the same as mine, just spelled "phoenetically" I guess that makes it more sparkly.

Posts: 170 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: florida
Lonelygirl10
♀ Member
Member # 39850
Default  Posted: 10:14 AM, September 16th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Her name is my middle name. It sucks, but I can't do anything about it.


29 Bgf
Dday: April 2013
Relationship ended: January 2014

Posts: 1059 | Registered: Jul 2013
AlwaysBeenStrong
♀ Member
Member # 39888
Default  Posted: 10:14 AM, September 16th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My STBX OW was called Pig by everyone and even by him. He used to tell me how HUGE she was.

Try not being able to eat anything made out of Pig now


BW: 41 (me)
Divorced soon.
Moving forward.
Pre Nursing Student
Getting a Do over at 42

Posts: 119 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Lonelyville
OldCow18
♀ Member
Member # 39670
Default  Posted: 10:36 AM, September 16th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Her name is like the most popular effing name there is, except, she spells it with a Y instead of the correct spelling with an I. I hate that effing name. Hate it. And yes, it turns my stomach every time I hear it.


Me, BW forty something, DD & DS,
Married to WH (49) 11 years, together 16
D-Day 6.8.13

Posts: 620 | Registered: Jun 2013
stunnedin12
♀ Member
Member # 38141
Default  Posted: 10:41 AM, September 16th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I see chickies name all over the place. I found a great new website --- right up until HER name was at the bottom of an article. Her last name is a pretty common word in our household and when I'm feeling especially vindictive I have the habit of using her nickname in place of the common word. Drives wh mad. I figure eh..... If some bozo (wh) wants to make a last night into a code name for his phone contacts then I can use it all I want!


ME - Betrayed Spouse
Him - Wayward spouse
Not sure, but trying I guess.

Posts: 436 | Registered: Jan 2013
Holly-Isis
♀ Member
Member # 13447
Default  Posted: 10:54 AM, September 16th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hurricane Sandy

My abusive mom's name AND the name of my friend, xOw1.

Not too long ago my 8yo DD wanted to name one of her dolls Charlotte (xOw2). I told her no, let's pick another name. She asked why and I told her it was the name of someone who hurt me. I'd rather not hear it. No, it doesn't have power over me, but I'd prefer not hear it from DD, KWIM? I did toy with giving our dog that name, if it was a female...just as an inside b!tch joke

The name has only the power you give it. Say it. Write it on scraps of paper and throw them in the toilet before you pee. Make up insulting rhymes.

Don't let this crap control you. You control it. You can. Like a bully you stand up to...you might flinch occasionally. You might hurt. But you won't get wounded over and over once you take back your power over a word.


"Being in love" first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. *CS Lewis*

Posts: 11010 | Registered: Jan 2007 | From: Just a fool in limbo
Tired05
♀ Member
Member # 39609
Default  Posted: 6:47 PM, September 16th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I like the "throw it into the toilet bowl before you pee" one. I also have heard tape it to the bottom of your shoe and go for a nice long walk.

My tummy does flips as well when I hear her name. Or even any names that rhyme with it. I can spit her name out and not feel the cartwheels in my belly...but if WH calls her by anything other than "her or she" I get angry!


Together 6 yrs. M 4 yrs. DD born 3/1/2013.
Me: BS -- Him: 1 EA/PA (6mos), PA (MW), and 6 ONS...Been at it for almost 5 yrs. *Still slave to TT* 1st DDay- 11/24/2012,
.....OC due in August.....

Posts: 122 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: United States
Topic Posts: 10

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