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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Wanted another child
Sad in AZ
♀ Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 7:15 AM, September 16th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I raised an only child, quite often like a single parent due to life circumstances. Please don't despair. Being an only child is a gift as well as a challenge.

DS grew up to be a strong, independent, loving young man. He has tons of friends and a handful of really good friends. He never met a stranger.

He recently went through an infidelity experience with his new wife, who is the oldest of 3. One of her 'complaints' was that he could easily entertain himself when alone, while she was so needy of companionship that she looked up an old boyfriend When she confronted him about this, he said, "Of course I can entertain myself. I was an only child; I had to."


I promise to surround myself with amazing souls and love them fiercely.

Posts: 19180 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
careerlady
♀ Member
Member # 16958
Default  Posted: 10:07 AM, September 16th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks for your replies and encouragement all. I am an only child and WS is not and I am often jealous of the long conversations and laughter he shares with his siblings. Though I was happy growing up I feel panicked about something happening to my parents and would like for DS to have a sibling. We'll see what happens. WH is back to saying hell do counseling just needs more advance notice so I will try that route one more time cause he DESPERATELY needs good therapy.


Me (BS, 35); The Snake (WS, 36) 13yrs together; 1 baby boy (DOB 7/12)
Serial cheater-Multiple OWs, Multiple D-Days
Divorcing! Stupid in house separation though

Posts: 864 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Northern California
careerlady
♀ Member
Member # 16958
Default  Posted: 10:13 AM, September 16th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

BrokenDaisy my appreciation for SAHMs has grown in leaps and bounds during my time with DS and I now know it is a more than full time job!


Me (BS, 35); The Snake (WS, 36) 13yrs together; 1 baby boy (DOB 7/12)
Serial cheater-Multiple OWs, Multiple D-Days
Divorcing! Stupid in house separation though

Posts: 864 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Northern California
ninebark
♀ Member
Member # 24534
Default  Posted: 11:29 AM, September 16th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm with Sad in AZ
I am a single mom with an only child. I worried about him not having a brother or sister, but he does so well on his own. He has tons of friends, he entertains himself quite well. They turn out just fine. Sure I would have loved him to have a brother or sister, but he was a very sick baby and I decided not to do that again as it was a hard struggle with many hospital visits.


BS (me) 40
WH - 48
Married 12 years
DS - 12
D-day 06/21/09
Separated....hopefully divorcing soon.

Posts: 630 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Canada
Whalers11
♀ Member
Member # 27544
Default  Posted: 1:04 PM, September 16th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My personal situation is a little different, but I sooo understand.

I'm almost 33. I don't have any children. My ex and I spoke often that we both desired a large family. He never felt "ready" but I think we were close... and then he knocked up the OW.

There is nothing harder that having to deal with knowing my ex is getting his chance at a family and it doesn't look like that is going to happen for me. Yes, I know, I still have a few years but I am no closer to it than I was 3+ years ago at D-Day. So I have just about given up on that dream...


Me: BGF - 33
Together 11+ years - not married, no children.
D-Day: 2/9/2010
OC Born: 10/9/2010
Status: He chose OW/OC and left immediately.

Posts: 2069 | Registered: Feb 2010
FieldsOfLavender
♀ Member
Member # 39154
Default  Posted: 4:38 PM, September 16th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I've been wanting child #2 for the last 5 years but for various excuses, he did not want one. Now, he has intentionally knocked up his whore after knowing her one year because her bio-clock is ticking and that is about all that has been on her mind, other than sex chats.

Posts: 183 | Registered: May 2013 | From: East Coast, USA
hexed
♀ Member
Member # 19258
Default  Posted: 4:48 PM, September 16th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi from an only child raising an only child. Its OK...really it is! I loved being an only. My son is only barely tolerating the addtion of my SO kids into his life.

I know its a hard concept for people with siblings to understand, but as only we don't miss them. We haven't had them. We kind of wonder b/c our friends have them so we kind of think it might be a good idea but we really don't know what we are missing. Its OK! We onlies have friends, good friends, functioning families, successful careers ect.


But that's just a lot of water
Underneath a bridge I burned
And there's no use in backtracking
Around corners I have turned

“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.” -foulton oursler


Posts: 8261 | Registered: Apr 2008
Topic Posts: 27
Pages: 1 · 2

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