Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying
Welcome

Forums

Guidelines

Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library

Media

Contact Us
lies
cover
In Association with Amazon.com
Support
Infidelity -
-
like us on facebook
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
[Register]
Newest Member: whatdoido21 (45321)

New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: And lied to and betrayed again
fraeuken
♀ Member
Member # 30742
Default  Posted: 10:01 PM, September 17th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This is just mind blowing to me.

Just last week we were out with with a guy friend and got talking about past relationships and Xso tells our guy friend how this woman preferred her dogs over him, how he was growled at and bitten when he wanted to lay down in bed, how there was no intimacy and friendship, how she made him do all the improvements to the house while she was out drinking wine with her friends and how he felt uncomfortable in the presence of her pretend upper class crowd and that she had a restraining order taken out on him after their split.

I guess what do you care about what you said yesterday....plus, let me be mean - he traded a Porsche for a Kia. Holy moly. I am starting to think he was just flattered that a fairly attractive, much younger woman wanted to be with him. And that was that.. She is the safe bet, friends with all his friends, adult children, a place he can readily move in.

But seeing this tonight has helped me leap forward to a point of "so what"? He was postering in church, loud mouthed, laughing too loud and desperately trying to be funny. What was I thinking?

[This message edited by fraeuken at 11:31 PM, September 17th (Tuesday)]


Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

Posts: 1260 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: California
JessicaFL127
♀ Member
Member # 26864
Default  Posted: 6:18 AM, September 18th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He is also a Kia, up on blocks with no engine. He deserves the stupid shit he was describing last week, doubly so because he signed up for it again. You are so much better off, good riddance.


BW,32
divorced for 6 years
mom to two awesome boys,10 and 9

"But you said your vows, and you closed the door
On so many men who would have loved you more" -Cath, DCFC

"The most amazing things can come from some terrible lies"


Posts: 1244 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Missouri
Random thoughts
♀ Member
Member # 2959
Default  Posted: 9:52 AM, September 18th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Not a Kia but a Yugo .


Those three words are said too much and not enough.
Chasing Cars-Snow Patrol.
FWW

Posts: 1604 | Registered: Dec 2003 | From: Some where in New Jersey
fraeuken
♀ Member
Member # 30742
Default  Posted: 11:51 AM, September 18th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

A friend just sent me this and I am really wondering if my picker is that broken, because xSO fits this description to a 'T':

http://www.lovefraud.com/anderly-publishing/red-flags-of-love-fraud/red-flags-of-love-fraud-chapter-5-the-sociopathic-seduction/

Stupid, stupid me.


Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

Posts: 1260 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: California
SisterMilkshake
♀ Member
Member # 30024
Default  Posted: 1:10 PM, September 18th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good article, fraeuken.

So, I was thinking about how your Xso treated you at the bar. You handled it with grace and dignity. But if I was your friend and I was there, I would have had your back. This is what I would have done.

Walked over to him, with drink in hand, and told him:
"Fraeuken only wants a real man. And you're not. You are a scared little boy in a man suit. You also think you are so "hot". Hope this helps cool you off (as I am pouring drink in his lap). Oh, btw, I have heard you have a small, limp dick, too! Buh-bye!"


BW (me) 50ish FWH 50ish
Married 34 years, 3 children
d-day 3/10 LTA (4 yrs./fucking & flirting)

"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak!" ~ Homer Simpson


Posts: 9793 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: The Great White North USA
phmh
♀ Member
Member # 34146
Default  Posted: 1:12 PM, September 18th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You're not stupid, but now that you can see the red flags, you will become a better dated. I married my sociopath and spent years with the parasite. You escaped relatively quickly, and now have more knowledge to make better choices next time!


Me: BW, divorced, now fabulous and happy!

Married: 11 years, no kids

Character is destiny


Posts: 3402 | Registered: Dec 2011
fraeuken
♀ Member
Member # 30742
Default  Posted: 1:33 PM, September 18th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sister, my friend and actually two others were ready to confront. I told them not to because I saw how drunk he was and he is a mean, violent drunk and I did not want anybody to get hurt.

I have seen him sliding back into drinking the last few weeks after he got off the meds for his sepsis. He had been on his best behavior I think and then could not keep it up. Who knows what other issues there are, I know I dodged a major bullet the more I think about it.


Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

Posts: 1260 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: California
SisterMilkshake
♀ Member
Member # 30024
Default  Posted: 1:38 PM, September 18th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You have great friends, fraeuken. I am sure you made the wise decision to ask your friends to not confront. I just hate when people behave badly (especially in public) and they aren't called on their bad behaviour.

As I have said, you are a dignified woman with lots of grace and class. (((fraeuken)))


BW (me) 50ish FWH 50ish
Married 34 years, 3 children
d-day 3/10 LTA (4 yrs./fucking & flirting)

"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak!" ~ Homer Simpson


Posts: 9793 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: The Great White North USA
fraeuken
♀ Member
Member # 30742
Default  Posted: 10:02 AM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This is getting weirder by the day. He managed to leave me a voicemail from another number. Claims that he never knew I was at the event?!? Dude, I asked you to order me a drink, you talked to me!

Also claims I read the situation totally wrong. Again, what did I read wrong about him not telling me he was going to the party, flirting with his ex, ignoring me, not answering his phone and him having been with her since that day?

Also, he states he is done based on my crazy actions that day which included leaving the party without making a scene, leaving him a calm message that I did not appreciate his actions and that he could collect his stuff and leaving him a note telling him that my boundaries were violated and that I felt humiliated by the man I loved and that I wished him nothing but the best but that things were over.

Call me crazy, should I have stayed and battled it out? Waited for him until he was done with her so be could acknowledge me? I don't mark my territory that way. If you don't want to be with me and I am cramping your style, I leave. I will not ever compete with another woman over man's attention. Neither would I ever make a man in my life have to do that. Jerk.


Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

Posts: 1260 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: California
She11ybeanz
♀ Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 1:34 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Also, he states he is done based on my crazy actions that day which included leaving the party without making a scene, leaving him a calm message that I did not appreciate his actions and that he could collect his stuff and leaving him a note telling him that my boundaries were violated and that I felt humiliated by the man I loved and that I wished him nothing but the best but that things were over.

Ex-squeeze me if I'm wrong but aren't YOU the one who broke up with him??? And, he is saying he is DONE? Awwww.....poor loser cheater boyfriend can't seem to handle the rejection of you breaking up with his deceitful ass after getting caught red-handed!!!! Go cry me a river and get the f*ck off of my bridge while I burn it down for you cause you ain't coming back this way choir boy!!!!

What did he expect you to do? Walk over to him and squat over his lap and pee on him to mark your territory at the party??

I think a good swift throw of red wine to his face might have been fun....(although a waste of good wine)...but she can keep that cheap piece of unclaimed land. There's a reason no one wants to put a flag on him.....apparently!

GOOD RIDDANCE BABY!!!

[This message edited by She11ybeanz at 1:35 PM, September 19th (Thursday)]


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2724 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
justabrokendream
♀ Member
Member # 3075
Default  Posted: 2:09 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What an asswipe - be glad you are rid of him. Now I know why I'm on the bus and will be for a long, long, time......

Posts: 306 | Registered: Jan 2004 | From: CA
She11ybeanz
♀ Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 3:31 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Now I know why I'm on the bus and will be for a long, long, time..

Me too! A year and a half going strong! Gotta love Duracell!!!


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2724 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
cayc
♀ Member
Member # 21964
Default  Posted: 3:52 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Gotta love Duracell!!!

I highly recommend upgrading to the plug in model, it lasts even longer.


"The difference between involvement and commitment is like ham and eggs. The chicken is involved, the pig is committed." -Martina Navratilova
"The question isn't who is going to let me; it's who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

Posts: 3119 | Registered: Dec 2008 | From: Mexico
movingforward777
♀ Member
Member # 6850
Default  Posted: 4:56 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Flushed! The things a bottle of sparkling wine makes you do

Pity you didn't replace his Viagra with a good,strong laxative....let little miss ex-girlfriend enjoy that one......
Sorry he is such a jerk...you are much better off without this asshole....HUGS


You can't reach for anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday's junk.......Louise Smith

Posts: 4845 | Registered: Apr 2005 | From: Ontario
fraeuken
♀ Member
Member # 30742
Default  Posted: 5:23 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I will get the Duracells out. It was a nice 4 months break but our mechanical friends come without all the drama and without ex-girlfriends.

I am realizing how much time I have on my hands again now. I found all kind of fun meet up groups and will head to a beach weekend with a girlfriend in a couple of weeks. Yeah!


Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

Posts: 1260 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: California
Simple
♀ Member
Member # 18814
Default  Posted: 7:02 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Call me crazy, should I have stayed and battled it out?

He probably expected a girl fight. That would've boosted his ego in his POV. His Ex was more than willing to play along giving you the look she did.

(((Fraeuken)))


Love is a choice.

True love is harder to come by than soul mates. True love requires work.

Ignorance can be cured with knowledge. There is no cure for being an idiot.


Posts: 927 | Registered: Mar 2008
fraeuken
♀ Member
Member # 30742
Default  Posted: 9:04 PM, October 8th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So Mr "I guess I was looking for a soft spot to land" moved back with his ex-girlfriend only a few days after I told him to take a hike. His friends, who I run into in our small town, are all shaking their heads about his stupidity. I guess he ranks below the dogs yet again. Ah, the choices some people make


Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

Posts: 1260 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: California
amitheow
♀ Member
Member # 4691
Default  Posted: 2:00 PM, October 9th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You said he was a mean, violent drunk so uh ... good riddance to him! He went to her cause he had no where else to go! Been there, done that!


Old Timer, Just here to help
My screen name is: Am I The Ow? - Not Ami the OW.

Because in my situation I didn't know if I was the OW at first or if I was being cheated on. Found I was being cheated on.


Posts: 5085 | Registered: Jun 2004 | From: Texas
EvenKeel
♀ Member
Member # 24210
Default  Posted: 2:14 PM, October 9th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Does not matter if he seen you or not....he specifically said:

that he did not want to go because he hated the place.

Then avoided your calls, etc.

Cricket this guy for good!

PS - there are plug in models?????

[This message edited by EvenKeel at 2:15 PM, October 9th (Wednesday)]


Eyes are useless if the mind is blind.


Posts: 2173 | Registered: May 2009 | From: Pa
StillLivin
♀ Member
Member # 40229
Default  Posted: 3:20 PM, October 10th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What a complete jerk/ass!
Sorry a POS like him was able to even get close to you and hurt you that way.


I don't need further confirmation of what a fuckwit he is. I already have plenty, thanks very much. -SBB
D: 7/2/2014

Posts: 2325 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: AZ
Topic Posts: 83
Pages: 1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5

Return to Forum: New Beginnings Post Reply to this Topic
adultry
Go to :
madness  
© 2002 - 2014 SurvivingInfidelity.com. All Rights Reserved.