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Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: little help
Itsgoingtobeok
♂ Member
Member # 37664
Default  Posted: 10:04 AM, September 20th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My WW received flowers from a om we do business with . My WW had a EA with this OM 6 months ago (I think it was a PA also but she denies any physical contact) .Our R agreement about this OM was she could only speak to him professionally .My WW decided to send the OM a thank you e mail for the flowers ? I told her the e mail should have been " I can not accect these flowers and please do not send me gifts in any manor ".Well we had a argument about it and she said there was nothing wrong with sending a Thank you e mail for the flowers . I'm I off base here ?


BS-(52)
WS-49
married 28 yrs
Kid's -2
A- several
DD- 12-10-12
Starting recovery

"I don't understand the world today I don't understand what she needs I gave her everything she threw it all away" tom petty


Posts: 209 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: Los Angeles
jo2love
♀ Moderator
Member # 31528
Default  Posted: 10:09 AM, September 20th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You aren't off base. She should have refused the flowers. I've done it and the delivery person brought them back to the florist. She needs to strengthen her boundaries. It sounds like he is trying to tip toe back into her life by being Mr. Nice. I suggest a NC letter that states any further contact will result in the police being notified.




Posts: 30684 | Registered: Mar 2011
AFrayedKnot
♂ Member
Member # 36622
Default  Posted: 11:25 AM, September 20th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

^^^i second that. All of our NC letters stated that any contact would be considered a threat and treated accordingly.


BS 39
fWS 36 (SurprisinglyOkay)
DD DS
A whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better. Reconciled from the A's but still working hard for a better tomorrow.
"Knowing is half the battle"

Posts: 2419 | Registered: Aug 2012
Morhurt
♀ Member
Member # 40166
Default  Posted: 11:34 AM, September 20th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Totally unacceptable. Totally.
I'm livid for you.


Me: BS
Him: FWS
M: 15 years
4 lovely daughters
Working to rebuild.

Posts: 839 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Canada
Searchingforhope
♀ Member
Member # 38437
Default  Posted: 1:24 PM, September 20th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You are not off base.

I agree with the others.

Sorry for your pain...

Strength to you.


Me: BW 51 (didn't have a clue)
Him: FWH 54(extremely remorseful about his stupid midlife crisis)
Married 27 yrs

PA that lasted approx. 2 weeks. OW was a younger but totally screwed up %#@%!

DDay 4-25-12
Reconciling


Posts: 130 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: California
SuperDuperWonderboy
♂ Member
Member # 34716
Default  Posted: 1:32 PM, September 20th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Not off base. This is a bullshit move. Sending flowers? WTF?

If your wife doesn't see a problem with receiving flowers from another man trying to insert himself into your marriage, then she is most likely still in the fog, and totally not getting it.

I agree with the others. Nothing professional about sending flowers to a member of the opposite sex. Totally unacceptable. I am pissed for you.


My Friends call me Wonderboy--That's Mr. SuperduperWonderboy to you Tred.


Posts: 1267 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Everett
Rebreather
♀ Member
Member # 30817
Default  Posted: 1:32 PM, September 20th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What they said.


Me BS
Him WH
2 ddays in '07
Recovering.
"The cure for the pain, is the pain." -Rumi

Posts: 5861 | Registered: Jan 2011
Topic Posts: 7

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