Always, tell the other BS! Always!
"It's hard to be in love when you can't tell lies"!
(Side note, My fwh still feels like crap for what he did to us, but he works so hard to make me safe and trusting towards him. He saves the pity (guilt) for him, not me.) At some point, they need to forgive themselves, but we are to be their first concerns.
Right now, just enjoy that new baby smell!! Let that be your motivation.