I would like to add that Joanh actually has a bit of a point. Sometimes I suspect some of us do tend to wallow a bit, beyond where it is helpful. I know I have, and I am a veritable Pollyanna.
We are in a really great place right now. Yet I was walking yesterday in the lovely woods with the beautiful foliage, eating a freshly picked apple, and ruminating, yet again, on the A. When I realized I was doing that I gave myself a virtual shake and focused on the beauty of the here and now. I was gaining absolutely nothing by thinking of it, and diminishing my present experience.
As a bit of a t/j, my H did something that I thought was cool this week. I had a minor trigger, which I haven't in months, over a sexual act on tv. He was a bit slow to respond (he is out of practice) and it took a little doing to get back in a good place. The next night he went out of his way to show me a wonderful time. Afterwards I said to him--"You and I make love--you never shared that with her. Absolutely. We have true passion and intimacy. Yes. I believe that even your orgasms are better with me. Of course." Then he told me that he was trying to make a new mind movie for me to replace any old ones. And you know what, it helped! End t/j.