Member # 34697
| Posted: 7:53 AM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
Yesterday was one of the neatest days of my non-dating NB and I just had to share.
After ex-shat left, I was panicked as a SAHM...I had no idea how I was going to get back into the workforce since we lived in an area that I'm not originally from. I remember putting in 10+ teaching applications to area school districts. No calls back. Not. One.
One day on a district website I saw an opening for assistant girls cross country coach for the local high school. I ran cross country in high school and have been running ever since. I figured I've got nothing to lose, so I applied. Almost didn't get the job because the head coach was looking for more of a cheerleader than someone who had knowledge...but he decided to take a chance and go a different route than what he had in the past.
That first year coaching them was fun and a needed distraction from the D and ex-shat antics. But D and ex-shat antics were definetely in the foreground and coaching was in the background.
This season that shifted. The further out I've gotten from D, the more mental energy I've had freed up to spend on my girls. They are the daughters I will never have. I love watching them gain confidence and attain their goals. I love being that other adult in their lives that they can come and share their joys and sorrows with. And I really love teaching them to run!
Yesterday, they had their conference meet and won it by one point over our rival to claim the conference championship. (If you know cross country, you know what a big deal winning by a point is). It's the first time they have done that in their school's history. I was so proud and grateful to have the opportunity to be involved in it.
When I first joined SI, I remember reading that the best revenge is a life well-lived. You know what, I didn't even think about that yesterday...didn't even think about ex-shat at all. Didn't once say to myself: "Ha! Ex-shat, my life is so much better and I've shown you!" Nope, not once did I think that because I don't care. I don't care about comparing my life to his life anymore. I just live my life and love it now.
Thanks for letting me share
Posts: 4198 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
Member # 20849
| Posted: 9:21 AM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
That is an awesome post and it is really neat to see how you have grown into the position.
You sound like you are in a good place right now. I'm glad!
Original WS D-Day July 10, 2008. Kept lying, he is gone.
New WS (2 EA's, no PA) 12-3-13
If you don't like where you are, then change it. You are not a tree.
Posts: 14913 | Registered: Aug 2008 | From: Ohio
Member # 33226
| Posted: 9:47 AM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
You can call me NIK
There's always failure. And there's always disappointment. And there's always loss.
But the secret is learning from the loss, and realizing that none of those holes are vacuums.
- Michael J. Fox
Posts: 22649 | Registered: Aug 2011
Member # 30346
| Posted: 9:48 AM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
me...BS, 43 years old, 2 small kids
WS, 41, multiple gay affairs
M 15 years, separated 3 years, together 17
Alis volat propriis "She flies with her own wings"
Posts: 3612 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Virginia
Member # 15584
| Posted: 9:49 AM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
Failure is success if we learn from it.
Posts: 3973 | Registered: Aug 2007 | From: michigan
Member # 33735
| Posted: 10:00 AM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
M -25 years, T - 31 years, 4 children
Dday October 8, 2011 - Multiple PAs and ONs
"When you give a lot of importance to someone in your life, you lose your importance in their life."
Posts: 952 | Registered: Oct 2011
Member # 20150
| Posted: 10:53 AM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
Celebrating 60 years on Earth
Posts: 16631 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
Member # 29250
| Posted: 11:19 AM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
I love this post!
I went to my first XC meet yesterday to cheer on my son's friend. The excitement in the air was so fun! I have recently gotten into running so it was so cool for me to watch the kids try so hard to beat their times. So many kids were crossing the finish line wearing only one shoe because their shoe had fallen off in the course and they wouldn't stop to put in on. I loved it! Made me wish I could go back to HS myself and run XC. :)
“People who cheat feel that life is for the taking, and that everyone deserves happiness no matter what the cost. I must remember these tricks if I ever have my soul surgically removed."
Me: BS 42. Him: WH 41 2 Kids 6&9
Married 14 yrs Together 21
Posts: 1514 | Registered: Aug 2010
Member # 37991
| Posted: 11:32 AM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
That is awesome! Thank you so much for sharing this.
exWSO, who cares
Kicked him to the curb 11/21/12
“I tramp a perpetual journey.”
― Walt Whitman, Song of Myself
Posts: 116 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Red State SE US
Member # 10552
| Posted: 1:26 PM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan
Posts: 15279 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Just a Cali girl
Member # 40564
| Posted: 3:15 PM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
Claps, claps, claps! Thank you for posting.
Posts: 84 | Registered: Sep 2013
Member # 34146
| Posted: 7:52 PM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
Great job, and so inspirational! That truly is the best revenge, and even better that you don't really care. Yay!!! And congrats!
Me: BW, divorced, now fabulous and happy!
Married: 11 years, no kids
The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark. -Michelangelo
Posts: 3099 | Registered: Dec 2011
Member # 36445
| Posted: 9:30 PM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
Yay! So happy for you Tesla.
[This message edited by Bluebird26 at 9:30 PM, October 6th (Sunday)]
"You can never have too much happy!"
Posts: 1151 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Australia
Member # 33698
| Posted: 10:00 PM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
That's awesome, tesla! Way to go as a coach and as an enlightened being who has left her dungbeetle ex and moved on to the state of "meh"!
BS (Me) 39
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley
Posts: 3398 | Registered: Oct 2011
Member # 31468
| Posted: 11:08 PM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
Just an awesome post tesla - just what I needed.
Together 9 yrs
Status: Divorced 4/27/11
Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron
It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling
Posts: 4160 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Texas
Member # 34525
| Posted: 11:36 PM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
Congratulations, tesla and girls' cross country team!!!! (hands clapping icon)
Much hope for continued happy days like this in your NB!!!!
BS (me) - 41
WH - 48, EA with HS GF x 2
M: 10 years, T: 20
2 small children
DDay#1 - Christmas 2011 (OW#1)
Confronted - 4/6/12
DDay#2 - July 9, 2012 (OW#2)
He is an SA (Oct 2012)
Posts: 827 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: the other side
Member # 30742
| Posted: 11:57 PM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013|
Tesla, as a mom of 2 girls I am so thankful for women like you.
DD16 has a wonderful, inspiring water polo coach. This lady made sure DD16 would re-join the team when she was going through a period of depression; she rallied the troops and DD16 got back into the sport and now is captain of the JV team.
Thank you so much for your dedication. And maybe you will that daughter one day, maybe a step daughter?
Keep going strong!
Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.
Posts: 1160 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: California
Member # 33857
| Posted: 7:56 AM, October 7th (Monday), 2013|
Way to go Tesla!!
Divorced by Interlocutory decree in May 2012. WW had an affair with a 66 yo doctor she worked for.
D-Day Sept 16. 2011.
BH- 52 (Me) / XWW 50 - ages back in 2011
Two great kids that don't deserve this!
Posts: 726 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: USA
Member # 35695
| Posted: 8:36 AM, October 7th (Monday), 2013|
awesome post thanks for sharing and congrats on living life well
[This message edited by MyVoice at 8:37 AM, October 7th (Monday)]
Me:BW 46, Him:WH 50
two kids DD14 and DS17
Married 26 years
OW 28, crew member (he was the ships captain)
"People are formed by their actions, not their ideals" unknown
Posts: 450 | Registered: May 2012 | From: Australia
Member # 7767
| Posted: 9:30 AM, October 7th (Monday), 2013|
I know that some sports are overemphasized in our world today, but it has been my experience that extra-curricular activities enhance the learning process in school.
This is particularly true when great caring coaches like you step up.
Even if you can't control the world around you, you are still the master of your own soul.
Posts: 7557 | Registered: Aug 2005
|Topic Posts: 20|