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Newest Member: BrokenFuture (44249)

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User Topic: To snoop or not to snoop. That is the question
Gumdropped
♀ Member
Member # 40798
Default  Posted: 12:05 PM, October 11th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I find myself questioning the amount of time that I am spending still trying to check up on him. It is not a fraction of the time and energy that he put in to that online relationship for a year and a half. I will continue to check because for now that's how I keep my sanity. But I do feel that at some point I am going to have to stop looking, but can I ever feel safe in his being truthful again? That it's the ultimate question. I think you should keep looking.


Me: 56
Him: 60
Together 2 1/2 years


Living together 14 months
D day May 13th 2013
R


Posts: 192 | Registered: Sep 2013
notquiteoverit
♀ Member
Member # 32919
Default  Posted: 12:50 PM, October 14th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

After giving it the weekend, I think I will let this one go for now. He is being good, and I am not that eager to stir up the muck anymore. Thank you all for your responses!


Me - BS 50
Him - WS 49
SOW - 52 destitute loser
D-day 1/28/11

Posts: 569 | Registered: Jul 2011
libertyrocks
♀ Member
Member # 38924
Default  Posted: 1:02 PM, October 14th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hmmm, I'm going to tell you what my IC asked me. So, what if you did find more from the past? Then what? You will want to dig more. There's no end to the digging. I, too, have had a almost a year of TT. If the present is going well, then there's no reason to keep digging for THE "answer" your digging around for...

For me, I can tell you I was filled with rage, anger, disbelief and unacceptance. I literally just forgave fWH about 2 weeks ago. I had been faking it and pushing it. I can tell you from experience, you have to be ready to forgive.


Me-BW 36. STBXH-35,alcoholic, suspected NPD SA. 2 boys. M 6yrs T13.
DDay #1 Nov, 2012. 1 year+ false R & TT. 10 OW PA's 1LTA (all W lied to) 3 years.
S Nov, 2013 and for good Jan, 2014
Filed for D Feb, 2014.

Posts: 909 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: So Cal, baby. :)
Gumdropped
♀ Member
Member # 40798
Default  Posted: 5:21 PM, October 19th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Has anyone ever used Discover It? It's a program that detects porn and chat logs on a computer. He says that he is opposed to porn but God knows he has lied about a lot in this last year and a half. I'm really not looking forward to reading back chats if they are detected and come up. The few I found brought me to my knees ......


Me: 56
Him: 60
Together 2 1/2 years


Living together 14 months
D day May 13th 2013
R


Posts: 192 | Registered: Sep 2013
Jrazz
♀ Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 5:26 PM, October 19th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm relieved to hear that you feel enough at peace not to muck-stir.


We are what we repeatedly do, excellence, then is not an act but a habit. - Aristotle

Posts: 16359 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
Gumdropped
♀ Member
Member # 40798
Default  Posted: 8:34 PM, October 20th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well I'm not beyond muck stirring apparently. Triggered again. Another discovery. Read a couple of e mails today from May 2012. He was with me. Telling a friend of his who asked if he might be interested in a girl friend of hers, to give him her number cause "he's available and a good catch" . Don't know if he ever called her or if anything came of it but another dagger to my heart. Now I'm really wondering about how many women he did contact over the last year and a half Grrrrrrrrr!


Me: 56
Him: 60
Together 2 1/2 years


Living together 14 months
D day May 13th 2013
R


Posts: 192 | Registered: Sep 2013
Topic Posts: 26
Pages: 1 · 2

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