I'm curious, what is the best way to document this in a way that could be acceptable in a court setting if it ever came to that?
It is what it is.
WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.
Also, when XPervert knows I am keeping records, sometimes it's spurred him to do the rules more, kind of like the hall monitor in school.
I use a little notebook that is easy to hide and I don't let anyone see it. I put anything in it about DD or her time with her father and it's helped me to have evidence of his lack of caring for the rules we've made or schedules we've set up.
I don't think there's a particular format, but I would think it could be of great benefit, in the end.
A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess
Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.
Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.
It includes everything (WW threatened me at this time, changed pick-up time on this day, DS said he wants me to come get him from WW early...)
I have highlighted in yellow the most pertinent parts and will make color photocopies of every month, to be placed in a binder along with my .pdf printouts of over 300 texts, with pretty damning stuff as well.
At the end of each month I have at the bottom how many days kids were with me, along with a percentage:
July: 22/31, 82%
Any judge who actually takes some time to peruse it will, I hope, see the reality of the situation.
All the best, dbellanon.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
Hopefully that won't be too much of an issue because I am insisting that any schedule changes be discussed through e-mail, but I just wanted to cover my bases.
I mean, who is to say I didn't doctor the spreadsheet?
I've had the same concern, dbellanon, and posted it here at some point. Couldn't she just retort, "These are just lies; he made this up recently to make me look bad."
I suppose that's true, but what else can we do? I look at it like this: if your average person (and of course a judge) looks at my mess of a calendar, just glutted with information, written in all types of ink and pencil, I can tell you it looks pretty damn convincing.
I also have all the really salient stuff highlighted so he/she can zoom in pretty quickly and see it.
For me, a spreadsheet or the like is just a little "clinical." I prefer the human touch. And if clinical is preferable, well, I've got Google calendar to back me up as well.
In any case, my attorney likes my calendar and suggests I make color copies (so the highlighted entries show up).
Hope this helps.