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Newest Member: 4hazel (45322)

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User Topic: Just a thought, not happy of course
cantaccept
♀ Member
Member # 37451
Default  Posted: 2:19 PM, October 12th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It seems that every day that passes brings a new question.

H has told me that ow was a BS. Her husband cheated with prostitutes and they divorced. She told him how devastated she was.

Now, my new question. I wonder if he comforted her, thought this was such a terrible thing to go through? Did he show her empathy and compassion?

Kind of like the empathy and compassion that I need from him now?

Where do these thoughts come from??? Does it never end?


"So often times it happens, that we live our lives in chains and we never even know we have the key"

I would now like to be known as Can!

dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh boots5050
attempted R, it was all a lie

Divor


Posts: 1418 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Connecticut
headdesk
♀ Member
Member # 40787
Default  Posted: 2:35 PM, October 12th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yeah, I get this. Part of it was the TTing and part was simply things I'd ask that he hadn't thought of until I asked them and he had to ponder it through.

He could be the 'hero' in the A. I was the one in more 'control' in the M and didn't need no saving, tyvm. But I want (we all want) them to GET it. Sometimes that doesn't happen. I'm lucky(??) in the way that if I can walk the WH through it, he can see it from my point. He rarely can get it on his own though and that's where the headdesking comes in. I'm hoping that once he starts IC that he can get the support and insight he needs.


Me: 39
WH: 42
DDay:Sep 19 2013 (only TT of EA)
Oct 4th 2013 revealed PA through snooping.
Marred 16 years, together for 20. Looking to R at this time. We have awesome kids (12/14).

Posts: 273 | Registered: Sep 2013
Gumdropped
♀ Member
Member # 40798
Default  Posted: 9:38 AM, October 18th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

On one of the 3 hour chats that I found my SO spent about a half an hour asking the OW about her past relationships. She said that her first H cheated on her more than once. My SO said that that would be a deal breaker for sure!!!! Here he us in an EA with her while living with me and HE says it would be a deal breaker! Just another instance of who and what you can be to someone behind a computer and a phone. She didn't know that he had a partner. She lived in another Province. How is it that when people who get on line think that they are the only " interest" that the person is conversing with? From what I found my SO had on going chats with at least 3 people. Sick. Sad. Pathetic.


Me: 56
Him: 60
Together 2 1/2 years


Living together 14 months
D day May 13th 2013
R


Posts: 201 | Registered: Sep 2013
Topic Posts: 3

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