[This message edited by coldshot at 11:08 PM, October 13th (Sunday)]
You state that getting primary custody is almost impossible. The fact that your daughter has been exposed to someone with a criminal history involving violence really really concerns me. Especially in light of the passing of the football players young son who was killed by the mothers boyfriend who had a criminal history of assault and domestic violence (several!!)
Your daughters safety (physical and emotional) has to be priority. You've already filed for divorce ~ can you ask this attorney what steps you need to do to ensure your child's safety while she is with stbx?
Do you have contact (phone, Skype) with your daughter when she is with your WW? Continue to nurture that relationship. Your DD needs to feel safe sharing with you everything.
"God, the pain of suddenly not knowing and trusting the one person you thought you could is so devastating." So true! Infidelity is so far the worst pain I have ever experienced. Are you in IC?
Continue to read here, post here, read books, IC, IRL support too. The roller coaster ride of infidelity and divorce SUCKS but with time and work, life will get better. I didn't believe it at first but now I am living proof. Hugs and good luck!
I have a book that NatureGirl recommends a lot "Divorce Poison". If she is filling your daughters head with that rubbish then you could have ground for parental alienation.
Is your daughter in IC? Are you?
Their whores being around our kids are the shards of glass in this shit sandwich we are all gagging on.
There is also a Betrayed Mens thread in the I Can Relate Forum.
I can't help on moral clauses as we don't have them in Australia. Unfortunately over here you can't protect your kids until someone has hurt them or gets very close to it. It appears to be the same in some US states too.
Channel your anger into evicting this arsehole from your heart and mind. Keep your eye on the prize - don't let her engage you and you just keep doing what you're doing.
You're going to be OK.
ps. I love your tagline.
"The liar's punishment is, not in the least that she is not believed, but that she cannot believe anyone else."
If I were you, I would go ahead and seek primary custody. That is what I did. We have joint legal custody, but I have primary physical custody. Fortunately, my ex didn't fight me.
"For whatever we lose, like a you or a me, it's always ourselves we find in the sea" ee cummings