you being placed in this land of limbo is horrible.
You either stop this immediately, and sign up for IC, send NC note, and become completely transparent, or I am filing today. Then be prepared to do it.
I did what you did,understood, cajoled, waited around and so on. Doing that only caused me pain.
I have said on many occasions if I had it to do all over again I would have just handed her divorce papers and walked out.
You will NEVER be able to "nice" her back into loving you. It's just not possible. I have been on here for 18 months and I have never seen it happen.
nothing she is doing is short of abuse.
I tried to nice my WW back into the M. Nothing changed in 18 months, except that I finally got tired of being played, and I was sure and certain that she wasn't coming back. That's eighteen months of my life I'll never get back.
For me, it was 21 months of Hell--now that I look back at it. First, it was the paralyzing fear that kept me inactive.
These, Hurtbyaffair, these...
Scorched earth. Immediately. I was you a year ago, and these good people had the same advice. I did not listen for the longest time, and it only got worse and worse.
I'm so sorry you are going through this. Wishing you strength and dignity. Don't permit her to deprive you of these any longer.