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Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: I am pregnant...... :(
topperoff22
♀ Member
Member # 40762
Default  Posted: 9:48 PM, October 16th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

All of us on this site are showing courage to move past societys limit of "Your wife cheated? Cut your losses and move on!" What if we listened to people who said "She did what to you?!? After all you have done for her?!?!"? I tell you what would have happened for me....I would be D right now, or at least in the process there of. I would have missed growing to my potential...have grown so much since I did not listen to societys message. I would have fallen short again if I had not changed my perspective.

I could not do this without the support of my family and friends and people like you and especially without Christ. My counselor said to me that many people say to walk away after infidelity, but said Christ does not walk away from us when we sin and we should try to show the same to our WSs. SHe said it is easier said than done, however. And of course, in some cases, it will have to be up to Christ to forgive and the spouse to say "I just can't...you've done too much harm."


BS - Me 36
WS - Him 35 (almost 36)
Child: son, 6; just learned one on way
DDAY - July 24, 2013 (thousands spent on ex girlfriend)
DDAY2 -Aug. 3, 2013 (proof he slept with her)
R is slow going after TT for 1 month

Posts: 316 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: US
kourt090
♀ Member
Member # 34926
Default  Posted: 9:49 PM, October 16th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Topper,
WH and I conceived our son within a month of DDay. Sure it was a stressful time - how could it be anything BUT stressful - but finding out our son was on the way gave us something to look forward to. He was a light in all of this darkness. He was a common goal we were working towards together. We wanted to R before we found out but this gave us all that much more motivation. It was also a nice distraction from the negativity that had seemed to engulf our life overnight. But, probably the biggest positive about him coming along when he did is it gave us a sense of a fresh start. WH's A ended just before we conceived and so there has not been one millisecond of his life in which WH was participating in an A. I can remember our last MC session . . . it was our last meeting but our first time bringing our newborn baby (he was only 5 days old). Have you heard the saying, "When one door closes another one opens."? That's how this felt. Like we were putting to bed the year of dealing with and healing from his A and moving forward to this new adventure . . . together. Honestly, I wouldn't change the timing for the world. Our little man is 9 months old now and the absolute light of our lives. Congratulations. :)


Kourt090

Posts: 292 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Utah
Tinker01
♀ New Member
Member # 40312
Default  Posted: 11:06 PM, October 16th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Topper,
My little one was conceived when I was at the lowest part of my life..She swam right past the birth control :) I really believe now she was sent to me to as a reminder there is always hope. I am also from a small town, so I understand the drama. I found that the more I focused on the little light inside of me and creating a health world for her to enter. The less I care about what everyone was saying. I know it won't be easy.. Trust me I have a few scars. But I also have an amazing 7 year old. You are stronger then you know! Sending light, love and strength !


Me 40
Him 5
Dday June 20/23 2013

Posts: 14 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Tinker01
summerain
♀ Member
Member # 37439
Default  Posted: 2:50 AM, October 17th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Not everyone can have one amazing parent. The love you may not feel now is likely to come when the shock has worn off and your wayward is either

gone

or

has done some serious work.

[This message edited by lauren123 at 6:27 PM, October 17th (Thursday)]


OW1 inadvertently let me know WH loves English breakfast tea. Never ever saw him drink it. And I never will.

Posts: 818 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Australia
heme
♀ Member
Member # 40684
Default  Posted: 6:32 AM, October 17th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Woozers, I just decided to skip by the drama posts...

On topic, I wouldn't waste anymore money on tests. False positives aren't all that common. Go see your doctor and have them run a blood test for confirmation. CONGRATS! Babies are a blessing. More than ever take care of yourself. I will pray for you.


BS: Me (30)
WS: Husband (31)
Married 8 years, together 9
D-Day: Sept 10, 2013
D-Day2: May 31, 2014
Children: 5, ages 7, 5, 3, 1 and due in September

Leaning towards leaving, no one deserves this pain.


Posts: 205 | Registered: Sep 2013
topperoff22
♀ Member
Member # 40762
Default  Posted: 6:34 PM, October 17th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have an appointment tomorrow morning to confirm things, so to speak. Of course, I'm really early in this process and anything could happen at this point (though I'm trying to be positive). WH was supposed to go with me but thought the appointment was later and has to do something for work instead. He's upset, but I told him it's not an ultrasound, just an appointment to check things out, etc.

HE's really excited about all of this, but also being cautious about his excitement because he knows it's early and because he knows I have these mixed feelings about the timing (mainly I'm happy, but it's also surreal). He is kind of cute -- talking to my belly (even though I told him the kid wouldn't even have ears yet) and planning to add an expansion on to the house for more space (we don't even have a room for this baby). He's talking about when we should tell my family and our son, especially.

It's hard for me because I'm really close to my mom and want to tell her but I also want us to share this a little bit on our own because we didn't really do that with our son. I want to tell my mom and friends so I can work through some of my feelings of trepidation about it all and the timing. But at the same time I want to surprise them with some kind of announcement. WHo knows. I do know Mom will probably find out fast because she's been asking me if my period ever started since I told her it wasn't starting whenI thought it should. Honestly? She knows....she just isn't saying she knows. :-)


BS - Me 36
WS - Him 35 (almost 36)
Child: son, 6; just learned one on way
DDAY - July 24, 2013 (thousands spent on ex girlfriend)
DDAY2 -Aug. 3, 2013 (proof he slept with her)
R is slow going after TT for 1 month

Posts: 316 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: US
PricklePatch
♀ Member
Member # 34041
Default  Posted: 6:54 PM, October 17th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Congratulations, giving life is a gift.


BS
Fwh
sorry post on my tablet

Posts: 313 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: pricklepatch
shatteredheart7
♀ Member
Member # 39734
Default  Posted: 7:56 PM, October 17th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!! Every child is a blessing!

My youngest DD is a result of HB with my XH. She is almost 15 yrs old and I feel incredibly blessed to have her. She is truly a unique individual with some amazing talents to offer the world. I have always said that the only reason I do not regret taking him back all those years ago is her. I am also glad that I didn't stay with him after she was born, but that is another story.

Also, I was on the pill with all 3 of my kids. The 2 babies I lost I was not on the pill...


Me~40
FWH~46
Married 8yrs
Together 11 1/2
Me~ 3 kids, 21,17,14
Him~no kids
A with a mutual "friend" for 2+yrs
He confessed 9/9/12
A was over 2/12
7/13~ Happier than we have been in yrs!

Posts: 240 | Registered: Jul 2013
ionlytalkedtoher
♀ Member
Member # 39802
Default  Posted: 8:01 PM, October 17th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Congrats to you. I for one am happy for you. Welcome, little baby :)

seriously, you have so much sadness to deal with-- I don't think it's right that anyone could add to the sadness. Let this be a joy in your life. It will be OK.


Posts: 264 | Registered: Jul 2013
Topic Posts: 49
Pages: 1 · 2 · 3

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