WH moved out just about ten days ago. Neither of us has spoken to a lawyer yet (I am calling for a consultation tomorrow) We had a verbal agreement that his days with DD5 would be EOW and Monday/Wednesday, plus he would pick her up and take her to school since I have an hour+ morning commute. We also agreed that on school nights, she would sleep at home (with me) in her own bed.
Last weekend was his first weekend. Here's basically how it went down:
-- Friday, picked DD5 up and took her back to his place to sleep over. No problem.
-- Saturday, took DD5 with him to work. Brought her home. I went out for the evening so he hung out at my place. When I got home, he was packing to leave, and then out of nowhere he had the gall to corner and KISS ME. I asked him what the hell he did that for, and he said to see what my reaction would be. I asked if he got the reaction he wanted. He said no, and then left.
-- Sunday, DD5 woke up at 7:30, so I fed her breakfast and was playing with her when he showed up at 9:30. He got pissed that she wouldn't drop what she was doing and immediately go with him, and so he yelled at her, "Fine, stay with Mommy, I don't care!" She started crying and then said she wanted to stay with me. He came in and apologized, and wound up taking her to a local farm with his new girlfriend/friend who might be a girlfriend/employee/whatever, and posted lots of "happy family" type pictures on Facebook. Brought her home, put her to bed.
-- Monday, picked her up and took her to work with him all day. He found out that he had to work late, and asked me if I could pick her up. I said I had plans but I would cancel and come get her. He pitched a hissy fit over how, no, he would just keep her and could I bring her some pajamas. I said no, I will come get her, it's a school night and it's in her best interest to get some undivided attention, which he took to mean I was saying he wasn't adequately taking care of her. (Which I admit, may have been the underlying sentiment.) Then he snapped back at me that DD5 IS HAPPY AS A CLAM BECAUSE G/F (his employee) IS PLAYING WITH HER. Which is of course, totally the same thing as her getting undivided attention from her father. She also painted my daughter's fingernails, which if it were anyone else wouldn't bother me, but some 24 year old girl who has only known my STBXWH for six weeks playing "mommy" with MY DAUGHTER does not sit right with me.
So I picked her up, brought her home, and we had a lovely evening together. He wound up working until 11:30. I can totally see how that would have worked out well for DD sleeping in his office on a school night. /sarcasm
Today was his night with DD5 again. He came over to spend time with her and put her to bed, and was full of attitude, insinuating that I'm insecure, insinuating that he is doing me a favor by paying the amount we agreed to for child support until a court order is in place, so on and so forth. I tried to let it slide and turn my attention to DD5 but he started yelling, which then made DD5 cry. His yelling made DD5 cry.
IDK what to do. I just told him I will handle the daily school dropoffs and pickups because it's not good for DD5 to see us fighting all the time.
I'm trying SO HARD to be amicable. SO hard. Not for his sake, not for mine, but for DD5 who absolutely adores her father. The issues he and I have are between us and I know it's not her burden to carry. But I cannot do that when HE instigates crap like this right in front of her.
That's it. I just needed to vent and get that off my chest. I know some of this is being petty but it's just so unfair that I gave him a second chance after he cheated once and then HE gets to leave. And then he gets to go live his happy little life. Sigh.
Any ounce of affection I had left for him is DEAD. ME - BS 33, HIM - WH 30
Daughter age 5
Together since 2001
DD#1 2/23/13, online EA. Claimed NC but A continued until 3/20/13 when OW called it off. DD#2 4/4/13.
DD #3 9/21/13 2nd EA (with employee). He leaves.