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New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: an analogy
caregiver9000
♀ Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 2:01 PM, October 28th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Every time I come to this forum gypsybird's "I got kissed" seems to leap off the page at me.

Isn't that a wonderful thing?

I have a potential new relationship that might one day lead to such a vibrant announcement. See? the world is full of possibility. might. could. one day. Aren't we all at that point in our lives about something?

One thing I have noticed is that I spend too much time second guessing, worrying, what iffing and analyzing all the ways the potential could be "misleading" or just "not there."

Why do I do this?

I have pretty much always been this way I think. Betrayal has certainly made it worse, in that I have a perfectly logical REASON for being this way.

But I don't think it is who I am at my core. At my core, real self, I think I am an optimistic, hopeful believer. What made me realize this was a throw away comment from a friend when I share my "tempered" excitement about this new guy and she asked, "Is he real?"

It is a valid question. But I got defensive on the inside. Like "why can't I deserve something great that if it seems to be present, it must be fake?"

My whole life doesn't HAVE to be a disaster.

After thinking about this, I came up with an analogy. It is about riding roller coasters. (I love roller coasters)

If the roller coaster looks unsafe I don't get on. But if the roller coaster has every indication of safety and I want that thrill and choose to ride, WHY in the world would I spend the whole time worrying about if it breaks or I fall out, or I get hurt, or it malfunctions? All of those are possibilities. But if I stand in line and get on board, doesn't it make more since to put my hands up and scream and holler and ENJOY the 3 minutes before it is over?

I don't know that I can achieve this. But I think it might be a better way of going about things than I have done.


Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5859 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 4:11 PM, October 28th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I like that very much, cg.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25716 | Registered: Aug 2011
cmego
♀ Member
Member # 30346
Default  Posted: 8:09 PM, October 28th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wait...I wanna hear about the potential new relationship???


me...BS, 43 years old, 2 small kids
WS, 41, multiple gay affairs
M 15 years, together 17
Divorced

"For whatever we lose, like a you or a me, it's always ourselves we find in the sea" ee cummings


Posts: 4182 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: South
Sad in AZ
♀ Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 12:51 AM, October 29th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Pssst, cmego; I think that's the rollercoaster she's talking about...


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20281 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
9.10.11
♂ Member
Member # 36336
Default  Posted: 6:07 AM, October 29th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

CG, the ride will be a bit shakey and scary at times....but why not "throw your hands in the air like you don't care" and enjoy the ride?! Get on and get it on! There are other roller coasters in the park if it doesn't work out.....and this one won't kill ya.

Posts: 123 | Registered: Aug 2012
cmego
♀ Member
Member # 30346
Default  Posted: 6:27 AM, October 29th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am literal and my brain is coddled from too much studying.

I just WANT CG9000 to find a man that deserves her.


me...BS, 43 years old, 2 small kids
WS, 41, multiple gay affairs
M 15 years, together 17
Divorced

"For whatever we lose, like a you or a me, it's always ourselves we find in the sea" ee cummings


Posts: 4182 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: South
Ann124
♀ Member
Member # 29289
Default  Posted: 7:17 AM, October 29th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Exactly!!! Perfect Analogy!

I don't want to live in a box ... I want to enjoy the ride!

Love it!


Posts: 387 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: Back Home ... And feeling Great!!
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 7:31 AM, October 29th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't know that I can achieve this. But I think it might be a better way of going about things than I have done.

Amen my sister from another mister!


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5609 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
caregiver9000
♀ Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 3:29 PM, October 29th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I LOVE YOU GUYS!!

Every time I re-read my analogy, my brain goes straight to the 3 minute comment and I can't help but think, damn but I hope the ride lasts longer than 3 minutes!!!

If I get brave, and convinced that I won't jinx myself I will cough up some details about this man. I am hopeful in a way I haven't been before.


Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5859 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
Topic Posts: 9

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