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Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: In suspence
betrayedme2
♂ Member
Member # 40639
Default  Posted: 5:24 PM, October 30th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Working on R a little over nine months now. Ups and downs. Had been ready to call it quits several times and one more slip up and it is over.She KNOWS this.

Just typing for right now. My WW is heading to a meeting tonight after work. It's an hr away from home in a town she use to work in and in which the HW still does. It's an training session for educational hours for her professional designation. This is also a town where where she met several people she had sexted. My mind is going a mile a minute and feel my pulse revving.

She just called me to talk and to try to give me comfort. She knows this makes me uncomfortable. I'm sure she'll text during the meeting and call me afterwards.

What also made me nervous is that she also wanted to take make some free dance lessons tonight at a bar that the scum bastard frequents. My wife and I are trying new/different things together and one thing she always wanted more from me is to go dancing. We took some lessons together, but she felt like she was more rusty and didn't feel as comfortable as she use to be with it. She wanted to go tonight to get a little more practice. This is line dancing tonight, so no couple dancing. She invited me to to, but I got the hint she wanted to go alone. This bar is much closer to home though. She's going to the meeting first, then on the way home stop by for the lessons. When she just called, she said she may skip the lessons and just come on home to be with me, which does make me feel better.

I could say "no" can't go to either without me, but I really have pressing things that I've got to get done this evening and can't spend the hour drive each way, hour meeting, and so on. As soon as I sign off here, I'll be working through the rest of the night... to be independently wealthy!! Anyway, obviously still trying to build the trust. I know, it's just been 9 months.... Hate this feeling. I'm sure she'll come home, I'll see the paperwork from her meeting, timelines will match up, gps will show where she's been at, and all will be fine. I'm pissed that I shouldn't have to go through this shit! I want a normal life back!! Oh well, new normal, right?

Have to run, thanks for listening! Everyone have a great night and hope you have an evening filled with peace!

[This message edited by betrayedme2 at 6:10 PM, October 30th (Wednesday)]


dday: 1/19/13
ME: mid 40's
WW: low 40'3
2 daughters, 17, 21
Reconciling

Posts: 83 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Midwest
AFrayedKnot
♂ Member
Member # 36622
Default  Posted: 5:47 PM, October 30th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I understand the desire for normalcy. We are almost 2 years out and we are not there yet. But we are much closer than we were at a year.

It sounds great that she is calling and texting to reassure you. Having her take on that weight is huge. I am hoping she changed her mind about the dance because it may make you uncomfortable.

All of these instances of being thought of while out of sight built my trust. Every time I checked and found nothing odd. Every time I didnt check but she asked if I wanted to all built my trust.

There are rarely "suspenseful" moments anymore. It does get easier.


BS 39
fWS 36 (SurprisinglyOkay)
DD DS
A whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better.
"Knowing is half the battle"

Posts: 2527 | Registered: Aug 2012
Deeply Scared
♀ Administrator
Member # 2
Default  Posted: 5:47 PM, October 30th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

betrayed...

We prefer that name calling of the OP isn't done in this forum...you can vent all you want on General, even tho I realize this isn't a vent thread.

I do think you're doing a great job with trying to rebuild trust and also that your W is putting forth such effort as well. But I think she should really skip the dance lesson at the bar...imho


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.


Posts: 196227 | Registered: May 2002
betrayedme2
♂ Member
Member # 40639
Default  Posted: 8:36 AM, October 31st (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well, she skipped the dance lessons and came home! It was very nice. Also had a real nice talk. She's really struggling with her self esteem and finally willing...no, wanting...IC. Makes me so happy and yet sad at the same time that she's suffering. I really think for the first time I heard true remorse. The light is beginning to shine at the end of the tunnel. We still have a long road to travel though. I know that.


dday: 1/19/13
ME: mid 40's
WW: low 40'3
2 daughters, 17, 21
Reconciling

Posts: 83 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Midwest
AFrayedKnot
♂ Member
Member # 36622
Default  Posted: 8:43 AM, October 31st (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


BS 39
fWS 36 (SurprisinglyOkay)
DD DS
A whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better.
"Knowing is half the battle"

Posts: 2527 | Registered: Aug 2012
Topic Posts: 5

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