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Newest Member: Dragonfly111502 (45331)

Just Found Out Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Polygraph reveals yet another blow to the soul...
♀ Member
Member # 18814
Default  Posted: 3:46 PM, November 1st (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I feel for you. I'm so sorry you're in this situation. I thought my husband was just into porn... which was bad enough, then I found out multiple PAs and EAs since we were dating all the way to 7 years into our marriage. 6 years of successful R later, we're stronger than ever so there's hope but both sides need to confess and give their all.

Hang in there. Welcome to SI. Hugs your way.

Love is a choice.

True love is harder to come by than soul mates. True love requires work.

Ignorance can be cured with knowledge. There is no cure for being an idiot.

Posts: 927 | Registered: Mar 2008
♀ Member
Member # 25144
Default  Posted: 5:34 PM, November 1st (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I read your profile. You have been through more than most people go through in their entire life. I am so glad he wasn't able to move in with OW. And HURRAY for your DS who kicked out his wayward father.

Have you told ALL the leadership at WH's church? He shouldn't be officiating anything. He shouldn't be leading anyone. He needs to become a follower, a learner, and relearn God's word from the ground up.

I can relate to you in that my H got involved with the married daughter of his pastor (H was living in a different town because of work) and he wanted to D me to M her. He actually thought a couple of Bible verses supported his new decision. It is especially mind blowing when a person who previously loved God, begins to justify adultery, and blame the faithful spouse. The fact that both people claimed to love God, and in our case the OW was a leader in their congregation, shows just how successfully people are able to compartmentalize.

Like the others have said, play hard ball with your H. You need to think outside of the box in order to overcome the sh*t sandwich you have been dealt. Do you have family nearby, or can you move closer to family who can help you? Your H needs to be cut loose, so he can sink or swim with his own choices. Then, and only then, he might wake up. But in his case, he is a serial cheater and will probably continue to be.

There is an old saying her on SI, "The best indicator of future behavior is past behavior."

Reconciliation means that we both are authentic and vulnerable. I still have my H, and he's a better man than ever!

Posts: 1716 | Registered: Aug 2009
Topic Posts: 22
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