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User Topic: Maybe they can change!?!
Mama_of_3_Kids
♀ Member
Member # 26651
Default  Posted: 7:41 PM, November 6th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I was looking at the website for a local church when lo and behold, I see that FOW is the secretary of said church I'm stuck between wanting to puke and really hoping, at least for her kid, that she has changed her slutty ways. I know I need to forgive, but this is hard Stupid thing is I'm sure she doesn't even realize what she did to me and my kids; how she almost ruined us by pursuing a relationship with a M man


Me: FBW/30 Him: FWH/33 The kidlets: DS13, DS10, and DD8 The hounds: Four Shih Tzu's
Finally, completely R'd
Clothed in strength and dignity, with nothing to fear, she smiles when she thinks about the future.~Proverbs 31:25

Posts: 11555 | Registered: Dec 2009
Raven96
♀ Member
Member # 40298
Default  Posted: 8:23 PM, November 6th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh, my goodness, are you kidding me??? Unbelievable!

I'm sorry, but I don't think many of the APs know or care what they do to us or our children. They're incapable. If they can sleep with someone who is married...

UGH! I hope if you were looking for a new church to attend, that would NOT be your choice.


Marriage isn't a test, so why cheat?

Posts: 379 | Registered: Aug 2013
Ostrich80
Member
Member # 34827
Default  Posted: 8:29 PM, November 6th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just because its at a church doesn't necessarily mean she's changed her ways, could be just a paycheck, Kwim? But yea that would seem strange seeing that. When ow went to a funeral of a mutual friend, I.opted out, however I was wondering if lightening would strike when she entered the church.


BS..me
WS..him
Been with him over half my life
4kid
DD1 10-01-09 DD2 02-12-12 discovered it never ended
OW..nothing special. Just your average skank
Status..#$%@????

Posts: 4944 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: midwest
Mama_of_3_Kids
♀ Member
Member # 26651
Default  Posted: 8:35 PM, November 6th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I understand that FOP CAN change...there are thousands(?) here that have changed. However, FOW in our case was never remorseful and tried to tell me that there was nothing between them She continued to whore around, with other men, after I discovered the A.

We're definitely not looking for another church...I was just looking at churches (it's something I'm interested in...seeing what others believe and such). However, no, we wouldn't go to that church now


Me: FBW/30 Him: FWH/33 The kidlets: DS13, DS10, and DD8 The hounds: Four Shih Tzu's
Finally, completely R'd
Clothed in strength and dignity, with nothing to fear, she smiles when she thinks about the future.~Proverbs 31:25

Posts: 11555 | Registered: Dec 2009
Gemini71
♀ Member
Member # 40115
Default  Posted: 9:49 PM, November 6th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

STBXH is a pastor's kid, regular church goer, attends bible study, ushers at services, plays on the church softball and basketball teams.... His hypocrisy knows no bounds.

Church involvement does not equal faithfulness.


Edited to correct stupid typos.

Two steps forward and one step backwards, is still progress.


Posts: 1658 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Illinois, USA
h0peless
♂ Member
Member # 36697
Default  Posted: 9:54 PM, November 6th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My Mom (a pastor's kid) cheated on my dad with the pastor of our church. I always find it strange when people confuse religiosity for virtue.

Posts: 1657 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Baja Arizona
Scientist
♂ New Member
Member # 40910
Default  Posted: 3:51 AM, November 7th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

No, I don't think they can change. Their whole way of doing relationships and what they will tolerate is different from faithful people. They are happy to survive on crumbs and sordid sex in carparks, with no real commitment and no involvement as adults in the real world. That is simply too much to change. I am hoping that there is a slight chance with my WS, but even there, the same horrible characteristics are there; and a hell of a lot to alter in one lifetime...


Me: 58
WW: 58
M: 36 years
Together 39 years
4 children, 1 grandchild
dday(1) July 2005; dday(2) September 2013

Posts: 46 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: UK
Undefinabl3
♀ Member
Member # 36883
Default  Posted: 8:19 AM, November 7th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I highly doubt that she's changed. She probably sees it as "see i am a good person because I work at a church now"


Me: 31 MH
Him: 37 MH
New online find 6/19/14 - shit

Posts: 1717 | Registered: Sep 2012
welcome14
♀ Member
Member # 26741
Default  Posted: 8:30 AM, November 7th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I can relate- WXF was vice president of the church council (MY church he converted to) and did not think it necessary to resign while he was trolling AFF, Craigslist, etc. He even married one of his whores in it. Needless to say, I haven't been able to go back, which is unfortunate since I am in a small town and that is the only church of it's denomination and I really liked the Pastor. The wayward's suckage knows no bounds.....


Nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home- nikki sixx

I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.


Posts: 1175 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: clarksville, tn/ Ft Campbell
Ambergray
♀ Member
Member # 40778
Default  Posted: 9:12 AM, November 7th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Maybe. The OW in our situation is heavily involved in church and was before, during and after the A. Makes me sick.


Me-38
WH-38
Dday June 2013

"What lies behind you and what lies in front of you, pales in comparison to what lies inside of you. Ralph Waldo Emerson


Posts: 87 | Registered: Sep 2013
DrivingPast
♀ Member
Member # 32984
Default  Posted: 11:31 AM, November 7th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

If one thinks OPs cant change then wouldnt one think that WSs cant change? Its a two way street, not one evil and one innocent.

I liked this quote:

I always find it strange when people confuse religiosity for virtue.


BW
married more than 10 yrs to a possible SA
D-Day May 5 2011
"Because one knows people best through their fears - the ones they overcome and the ones they are overcome by."

Posts: 1304 | Registered: Aug 2011
Truly
♀ Member
Member # 40715
Default  Posted: 11:46 AM, November 7th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

One of WHs OW (BBC) sates in her email that:

"She is good womens, faithful and of God."

She also has a whole, great long winded character reference, obviously from an ex, on one of those 'searching for a new man'(status) sites, (BADOO, I think) He raves on about her religious, pious, perfect behaviour...

Yeah, that's why you're 43, never been married and a serial user of other women's husbands.

(Insert rude comment about OW here)

Many a hypocrite spends time in church, do you think it makes them feel better? Are they attempting to hide their sins under a veneer of piety or atone for past sins? Who knows...I have a limited understanding of Ws mind maps...


There are dark shadows on the earth, but its lights are stronger in the contrast.
Charles Dickens


Posts: 257 | Registered: Sep 2013
Topic Posts: 12

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