Perhaps if you tried a different approach, it may help open up the lines of communication. Tell your BH that you recognize that this is a difficult day/weekend, that you are truly remorseful, how you have changed, how thankful you are that you are here with him today after all that has happened, how much you have grown and will continue to do so. Tell him that you will be here for him, but will not pressure him to open up if he is not willing. Then step up and do things that will make the weekend run more smoothly~take charge of meals (but ask BH what he would like to have for dinner), drive kids to activities, check with BH if there is anything that he would like to do or that needs to be done. Show him through your acts and attitude that you are committed to R and your M.
Hope this helps.
[This message edited by meplusfour at 2:24 PM, November 8th (Friday)]
Right now, your BH is asking for space, perhaps not physical space but space nonetheless. He'll heal on his own time and no one else's. He's going through his own process at his own pace just as you're going through yours at your pace. Respect him enough to allow this.
All affairs are variations on a theme. No one has 'Beethoven's 5th' to everyone else's 'Chopsticks'.
Me: fBH 46
Her: exWW 42
DDay: Nov 1, 2012
I am working on the understandings and have come a long way.
I gave my BH the space and this is how it went.
The weekend ended up going fairly well, my H even shared his feelings a lot of anxiety and tears this weekend, and yet a lot of love and caring and building. I find this mess I've made this nuclear disaster undefinable. Its such polar opposites in feelings, love hate, push pull. And yet we are still standing here together. WE can still love one another.
So letting go of the control and your advice was very helpful, Thank you.