Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying
Welcome

Forums

Guidelines

Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library

Media

Contact Us
lies
cover
In Association with Amazon.com
Support
Infidelity -
-
like us on facebook
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
[Register]
Newest Member: KevinTheAsshole (45445)

General Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: I have the revenge affair set up for tomorrow. Talk me down?
karmahappens
♀ Member
Member # 35846
Default  Posted: 11:05 PM, November 9th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

She gets hugs because on SI we support each other.

We struggle, we fall down and we get up and try again.

Shame on anyone for not supporting another member that recognized a negative path and immediately righted a wrong.

What she did initially may not have been "right" but she is here because she is in pain, like the rest of us.

I will support anyone asking for help.

(((shelz)))

[This message edited by karmahappens at 11:43 PM, November 9th (Saturday)]


“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

Posts: 3850 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Massachusetts
circe
♀ Member
Member # 6687
Default  Posted: 4:53 AM, November 10th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Can someone tell me why this OP is being given hugs and cuddles? They showed so much wayward behavior. They sought out an affair partner and made obvious inappropriate messages. YAY! They came here for support to stop from making thing physical. Sorry but this is an EA from my view.

Because one thing that I'm pretty sure all BS can agree with is that we wish there was that one critical moment when our WS would have stopped, thought, considered their course of action, questioned themselves, sought GOOD advice from people who would steer them in the right direction, and then changed their behavior before a single other harmful action was made. And that's what happened here.

The OP already knew their actions were wrong. They stated it clearly, and in the title of their post said "talk me down" - they asked for help. What possible good would it do to beat them up and try to "convince" them of something they've already acknowledged and are asking for help trying to correct?

They get hugs from me because they came here for support and encouragement in a positive direction, something we can all benefit from.

(((Shelz))) I'm glad you came here and I'm glad you did the right thing!!


Posts: 3197 | Registered: Mar 2005
refuz2bavictim
♀ Member
Member # 27176
Default  Posted: 5:16 AM, November 10th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Others expressed my thoughts already so I'll just quote them...

another member that recognized a negative path and immediately righted a wrong.

What she did initially may not have been "right" but she is here because she is in pain, like the rest of us.

we wish there was that one critical moment when our WS would have stopped, thought, considered their course of action, questioned themselves, sought GOOD advice from people who would steer them in the right direction, and then changed their behavior before a single other harmful action was made. And that's what happened here.

It makes me happy to see someone seek the help they need and self correct.


BS:ME DDay: 7/18/09 Last of TT 7/11/10
MOW's EA/PA all were my "friends" but one


Posts: 2372 | Registered: Jan 2010
Shelz
♀ New Member
Member # 40126
Default  Posted: 8:35 AM, November 10th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hey everyone, it's day 2 here. It was an EA - an EA with someone I met once in a bar and exchanged numbers whilst very drunk. We texted and while I tried to end it I didn't and did spill my guts him. An EA over text messages. I needed support because something's wrong with me. It's not right, nope, but it's what I did. I looked to the wrong place for support. I should've been stronger and just ended my marriage but this was a huge wake up call that I need to end this.

I sat there holier than thou to my WH for a long time. I tried to make it work but honestly, I don't love him and two people deserve to be happy. He sees that too but he is terribly hurt that I no longer love him and secondly very jealous of my EA. It doesn't feel good to keep hurting someone. I know what it's like to be on the receiving end.

I'm so thankful for this place, I needed a huge course correction. And I'm so glad I posted and all of those folks that listened without judgement - thank you so so much. My life will be different but hopefully better because of a single message board post.


Now that she had nothing to lose, she was free. (Paulo Coelho)
me-- BW SAHM, 1 DS. Somewhere in land between R and S.

Posts: 9 | Registered: Jul 2013
Topic Posts: 24
Pages: 1 · 2

Return to Forum: General Post Reply to this Topic
adultry
Go to :
madness  
© 2002 - 2014 SurvivingInfidelity.com. All Rights Reserved.