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Newest Member: 4hazel (45322)

Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: After the mammogram, now the biopsy :(
jemimapd
♀ Member
Member # 37895
Sad  Posted: 3:44 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well, I am a bit shocked because I had convinced myself that my diagnostic mammogram and ultrasound would show the lump found by the routine mammogram to be a fluid filled cyst (of which I have had 3).

I went to the hospital first thing this morning expecting to get the usual all-clear.

No, they dont knkw what it is. So now I have to get a biopsy. I had just set myself up for it to be nothing.

I think it is all OK. It is well-defined, good acoustics, but it is a lump with a blood supply. The doctor said he thought it was probably but not definitely OK.

I just feel really tearful. My doctor's office has had all day to send the order for the biopsy and hasn't sent it so I can't even schedule it. I'm so miserable with this in house separation which has another 2 weeks until the final hearing. I haven't told STBX and of course he forgot about my appt which just shows me what a selfish jerk I have been married to the last ten years. I did go and have lunch with a friend who has offered to come with me.

It just feels like the worst possible timing.


Jemima Puddleduck is a trusting soul....
DD 1 Dec 2012; Divorced 11/13; 2 children
Me: BS (47) Him: WH (52) Her: 3 PA's
Ex bought a house, The Money Pit With Mold That Will Never Be Finished. He's living in the basement.

Posts: 726 | Registered: Dec 2012
nutmegkitty
♀ Member
Member # 33882
Default  Posted: 3:48 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((jemimapd)))


me (BS)
him (NPD Ex)
2 dds
DDay 10/7/11
OW
OC

Divorced 1/17/2013

"Diamonds aren't a girl's best friend, freedom is."


Posts: 2601 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: MA
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 4:00 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((jemima)))) Sending you strength, honey. And tons of mojo for a clean biopsy.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25698 | Registered: Aug 2011
suckstobeme
♀ Member
Member # 30853
Default  Posted: 4:01 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((((((massive hugs)))))))))


BW - me
ExWH - "that one"
D - 2011
You get what you put in, and people get what they deserve.
Hard as it may be, try to never give the OP any of your power or head space.

Posts: 2835 | Registered: Jan 2011
HeartInADustpan
♀ Member
Member # 38341
Default  Posted: 4:11 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

We're all cheering you on. Hang in there. (((HUGE HUGS)))


Just call me Heart. :)
Reconciling
"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything" ~Mark Twain

Posts: 379 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: St. Louis
numbandnauseous
♀ Member
Member # 34525
Default  Posted: 4:48 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

jemima, honey, I am so sorry. You have a lot on your plate. Be gentle with yourself today. Can you get out of the house and do something just for yourself? Mani/pedi/massage, brisk walk or at least schedule something if you can't do it today?

I am so sorry, jemima. We are all here for you sending good mojo for everything to turn out ok. Keep posting.

(((((((jemima)))))))


BS (me) - 41
WH - 48, EA with HS GF x 2
M: 10 years, T: 20
2 small children
DDay#1 - Christmas 2011 (OW#1)
Confronted - 4/6/12
DDay#2 - July 9, 2012 (OW#2)
He is an SA (Oct 2012)
Divorcing

Posts: 827 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: the other side
Tripletrouble
♀ Member
Member # 39169
Default  Posted: 5:01 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So sorry to hear this. Not that it's ever a good time, but this is REALLY a bad time. My heart goes out to you. Big hugs Jemima.


40 somethings - me BW after 20 years
D Day April 2013
Divorced November 2013

Be happy with what you have while you work for what you want - Hellen Keller


Posts: 638 | Registered: May 2013
Williesmom
♀ Member
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 5:36 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((Jemima))


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7761 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
still2suspicious
♀ Member
Member # 31722
Default  Posted: 5:42 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((jemimapd)))

Sending prayers your way.


Me: BS
Him: WH
DDay: LTEA

Posts: 1299 | Registered: Apr 2011 | From:
LifeIsBroken
♀ Member
Member # 27071
Default  Posted: 5:54 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Think positive and know - KNOW - you can deal with it if it does turn out to be something that needs further attention. You've already had more on your plate than most and you have survived it.... I have taken one of my best friends 2x for biopsies (her H was working out of state both times) and both turned out to be nothing. Sending you hugs and lots of strength....

(Your PM's are at their limit, just fyi)


BW: 59
XH: 60
Married 34 yrs, LIBerated: 2/17/11
MOW: 50 (she said she wanted a sugar daddy; xh said, "I'M HIM!")
Actions ALWAYS have consequences. Too bad cheaters don't consider the consequences BEFORE they create so much damage.

Posts: 504 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Missouri & Massachusetts
Iamhappytoday
♀ Member
Member # 39051
Default  Posted: 6:07 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((jemimapd)))

This happened to me the same week as D-day. Sending you good mojo and strength.


BW 39
WH 34
2DD's 15 months at start
Together 10 years, M 9
OW 22 CW, 2kids by 2 men & youngest less than 1 when affair started.
Dday 1 8/16/12 "just texting"
TT, gaslighting, denial; was always PA; he left me for her.

Posts: 135 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Free!!!
gardens64
♀ Member
Member # 38449
Default  Posted: 6:39 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi Jemimapd, I am so sorry to hear about your situation. I'm undergoing in-house separation too and it's so hard to deal with health concerns on top of all this mess. Sending support and good mojo your way. I'm glad you have a friend that is supporting you as well.

Posts: 57 | Registered: Feb 2013
sri624
♀ Member
Member # 33956
Default  Posted: 6:46 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

i just wanted to send you all kinds of hugs and blessings. you have friends here surrounding you with support.


BS (41):(Former Doormat)
WS (39):(Busted Cheater)
Married: 10 years, 3 kids under 5
DD1: 10/11 PA/EA with pilates instructor/former stripper.
DD2: 10/12 False r, cheating with other women, online dating,Substance abuse issues.
R:Last chance

Posts: 973 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: Alabama
tushnurse
♀ Member
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 6:49 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh sweetie. Take some deep breaths be nice to you. The not knowing is the hardest part, but this is out of your control.
Get it scheduled tomorrow, know that it didn't just show up overnight and waiting a few days to weeks is not going to change the outcome. Rely on friends and family.

Know no matter what this is you are strong and capable. You will be mOre than able to kick its ass and take names. After all you survived in house separation.


Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 8691 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
authenticnow
♀ Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 6:49 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((jemimapd)))


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 37987 | Registered: Sep 2007
dmari
♀ Member
Member # 37215
Default  Posted: 6:55 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

shit. I am so sorry jemimapd. dammit. Please take your friends offer and have her go with you. You will be in my prayers.


Me (BS): 43 Children: DD 19, DS 15
Divorced September 30, 2014
"It's always darkest before the dawn ..."

Posts: 2268 | Registered: Oct 2012
jemimapd
♀ Member
Member # 37895
Default  Posted: 6:58 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The not knowing is the hardest part, but this is out of your control.

I feel my life is suspended. Yes, I am mentally preparing for a week of not knowing and just deciding that it is going to be OK.

It shows me the extent to which I am without a husband and at the same time that I am OK with that - because the last time I was in the hospital two years ago, STBX was outside calling OW and then fucked off to see her in the afternoon. At least I know what is the truth today. I am in the same house with him but mentally and emotionally I am divorced from him. I cannot rely on him but today I know that.

When I came out of the office today there was an elderly couple sitting together waiting which made me feel a bit sorry for myself, but who knows what their real story is.

This site really is something special. It means a lot to me right now. Thank you.


Jemima Puddleduck is a trusting soul....
DD 1 Dec 2012; Divorced 11/13; 2 children
Me: BS (47) Him: WH (52) Her: 3 PA's
Ex bought a house, The Money Pit With Mold That Will Never Be Finished. He's living in the basement.

Posts: 726 | Registered: Dec 2012
Vulcanized
♀ Member
Member # 33523
Default  Posted: 7:03 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((jemima)))

I hope it is nothing. I'm glad you have your friend for support. You have us here, too.


Me: MH 40s; Him: MH 40s (I had RA)
OW: 30s, moron; one of many
M: 8 yrs
3/13: D'd
-----------------------------------------------------------
Everything is as it should be.

Posts: 762 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Vulcania
BrokenRoad
♀ Member
Member # 15334
Default  Posted: 7:15 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((jemimapd)))
I had this happen to me. They ended up just removing it instead of the biopsy when they went in. And it still turned out to be benign. It can still be totally okay.

HUGS!
BR


{Him}FBH - 43 (WifeHad5)
{Me} FWW - 44
2 kids 7 & 12
Reconciled :)
Beauty and folly are old companions.--Benjamin Franklin

Posts: 10730 | Registered: Jul 2007 | From: Midwest
jemimapd
♀ Member
Member # 37895
Default  Posted: 7:19 PM, November 11th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

BR, what was it? The doctor went through the possibilities but of course I wasn't really taking it in.

]Your PM's are at their limit, just fyi)

Thank you! Deleted oldies.


Jemima Puddleduck is a trusting soul....
DD 1 Dec 2012; Divorced 11/13; 2 children
Me: BS (47) Him: WH (52) Her: 3 PA's
Ex bought a house, The Money Pit With Mold That Will Never Be Finished. He's living in the basement.

Posts: 726 | Registered: Dec 2012
Topic Posts: 46
Pages: 1 · 2 · 3

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