To keep it short I'll just tell you about d-day:
First we went to another town away from EA town & had a long refreshing bike ride, we then went to a perfume bar and had "me" made. Finally, in the evening we went to dinner where they both worked (not easy but my choice), we ended up with a table in the direct line of vision of the OW. Employees stopped by as we charmed, smiled, laughed, held hands, cuddled, shared bites, kissed & literally eye-fucked each other it drove OW crazy!! She got madder and madder as the night DRUG on, my choice. It wasn't super comfortable for Mr Lucky, but like I said, it was about me !!
The next anti-versary I could look back at the day with a smile and a few giggles instead of the horror of the actual day.
I suggest talking a out it with your BS, ask her what she'd like and maybe offer some suggestions?
But yeah. I would think acknowledging it ahead of time and asking your wife if you could spend the day with her (or even meet for lunch) would show her you are being pro-active and really want to do right. And maybe she won't want to do anything with you. If that is the case may I suggest a gift card to a spa. Write her a letter letting her know what an incredible woman she is. How you are thankful every.single.day.for her to be in your life.
Hey. As the BS, I know lunch, spa, shopping sound frivilous but compared to the hell from the year before...I would take that. The letter trumps all for me tho.
This is only my second post but I have been through a year of hell and can now see the end of the gloom. Things will get better for you if you stay focused.
Best of luck! Bump me if you need.