Topic: Meaningful things our WS says
Member # 40758
| Posted: 8:13 PM, November 14th (Thursday), 2013|
Thank you for giving me another chance.
I can not imagine the hurt I caused you
Never realized how hard you worked for this family, and how selfish I became.
I will do what ever it takes to be there for you and to show my love for you..I never want to be in that place again.
Posts: 98 | Registered: Sep 2013
Member # 40779
| Posted: 8:16 PM, November 14th (Thursday), 2013|
"Men are idiots" (meaning him)
"This is the worst mistake EVER in my life"
"I am glad that this woke me up and we are better now then we have been in our whole marriage"
And actually holding me at night when we sleep. He hasn't done that in 15 years.
[This message edited by heartbrokeninaz at 8:17 PM, November 14th (Thursday)]
BW 40 (me)
"Love is patient it is kind"
DDay 07/31/13 ONS with horseface
Posts: 117 | Registered: Sep 2013
Member # 22730
| Posted: 9:31 PM, November 14th (Thursday), 2013|
"I'm not going anywhere, I'm in this for the long haul."
"Thank you for letting me back in your life."
I've gotten off the crazy train and I'm loving living life.
Liberation day: May 20, 2010
R began: November 20, 2011
He blew it up: Feb 6, 2014
Posts: 1406 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Florida
Member # 38541
| Posted: 9:52 PM, November 14th (Thursday), 2013|
I am very sorry, I might not tell you or even show you how sorry I am but please believe me I am sorry for the hurt I have caused you. Thinking about it today and I wonder if I have been too focussed on fixing myself that I may have forgotten about you and your feelings. I know now where I am and I know the pain this still causes you so I will endeavour to change the focus from me and onto you.
I love you with all my heart.
Posts: 152 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Australia
Member # 33867
| Posted: 12:15 AM, November 15th (Friday), 2013|
Things my WH said, and continues to say...
"I am sorry that I hurt you and the kids"
"I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you; trying to make you happy again"
"It is all my fault, you did nothing wrong"
ME: 53 BS
HIM: 60 WH
Married: 28 years
in R 3 years and it's working but he is putting 200% into it (as he should) to make it right again.
The truth hurts, but I have never seen it cause the pain that lies do.
Posts: 1887 | Registered: Nov 2011
Member # 37658
| Posted: 8:00 PM, November 15th (Friday), 2013|
I heard "I'm sorry" more in the first week post Dday than I had in the all the years we had been together (22 years at that time).
My latest favorite when I asked what he wanted for Christmas, "Nothing. I am just glad you are still here. That is all I need."
Other good ones are "I was so selfish. You did nothing wrong." and "I'll do whatever you need."
Koss424...my WS doesn't say these things out of the blue. It is most always in response to a look on my face or something else that brings up the A. Once it was because of a good time we were having.
his A was in 2001, DDay confession 9/5/2012
Posts: 89 | Registered: Nov 2012
Member # 30826
| Posted: 8:36 AM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
During my anger phase..."Let me love you."
Such a simple statement...but I was so entrenched in my rage that I couldn't accept his love.
This is part of a letter he wrote to me, after he "got it"......
"Im going to rebuild that trust, and make it stronger than ever before. Not by words or promises..by ACTIONS. You will be able to see me as your "rock" again. I will never falter,waiver, or stumble. I will be there,by your side, through thick and thin, good and bad. My goal is to BE the man my children see, and the man my wife needs. You will know you are loved..every minute of every day. "
"I am not that man anymore."
"You can ask me anything..I will tell you everything."
"This had nothing to do with you. I did this. All of this."
Goodness...he has said so many wonderful things..especially in the last several months. I get poems every day(some silly,some not..but this is so unlike my FWH..it shows me he is really putting forth the effort..and THAT is important).
But the best thing? He means what he says,and says what he means. I don't have to wonder anymore. he has been showing me he means all these pretty words,because he follows them with actions. He tells me these things..but he also shows me. Every day.
M: June 2001
Status: R? I don't know..ask me tomorrow..it changes rapidly.
..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.
Posts: 6292 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: Indiana
Member # 40674
| Posted: 8:45 AM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
For me. The biggest ones
- I want to make love to you on my 80th birthday
- But even if I can't be with you I will support you for the rest of your life
- I will never chose to end my life
The fact is that he was obsessed with his inevitable suicide for the past 7 years and as a result he was not committed to spending his life with me. His A was in many ways a long (and bloody painful to me) suicide note. I was going to find out and throw him out and then he could die without guilt as he would be out of mine and our children's lives by my actions...
Me BS, 41
Him WS, 45
EA and PA (PA for 11 months)
3 children - 15,12,3
WS has bipolar, no excuse...
"We're not broken, just bent. We can learn to love again."
Posts: 421 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Ireland
Member # 39567
| Posted: 1:02 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
My H knows what he did to us " I am so sorry for the hurt I have caused you".
"Even with all the roller coaster rides we take, I will spend the rest of my life showing you just how sorry I am and how much you mean to me". "It was me who made such bad choices that has caused you so much pain,and for that I am sorry and will make every effort to become the husband you deserve". "You are so precious to me, I won't be without you ever again". "You are the one who completes me, when I cheated I not only broke our marriage and your heart, I shattered what was then me".
Posts: 65 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: United States
Member # 41303
| Posted: 1:48 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
Thank you for still loving me and giving me a second chance.
Your are my life, my rock, I don't know what the hell I was thinking.
If I have to prove to you for the rest of my life I will because you are the love of my life.
You are a kind and beautiful lady.
Please don't leave me my life would be nothing if you were not in it.
Many more but it feels good when he says them.
Life is not measured by the breaths we take
but by the moments that take our breath away.
Posts: 195 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: canada
Member # 36622
| Posted: 2:04 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
Oh a couple more..
"I am sorry I came to you so broken"
"Thank you for staying"
fWS 36 (broevil)
A whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better
"Knowing is half the battle"
Expecting progress not perfection
Posts: 2322 | Registered: Aug 2012
♀ New Member
Member # 41365
| Posted: 3:03 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
I'm brand new here and sorting out if I want R or not, but I feel like this might be a better forum for me right now. And reflecting on the good helps me get through my days.
In response to me saying something about his choice of friends to spend time with: "I am the one who enabled my own bad choices."
"I hate that I hurt you and I'm doing my best to be here for you."
"I've been thinking a lot about what a terrible person I am and what a good person you are. I realize that I don't deserve you and I also appreciate your goodness more now."
"I've realized that I was a terrible partner for a long time and didn't invest time and energy in the relationship." He then was able to acknowledge that what he saw as negative from me was a reaction to his behavior, and not intentional harm on my part.
Me (BS): 33; Him (WH): 32
Married: 6 years, together 13
D-Days: 02/07/13, 11/12/13
Getting a divorce and thrilled about it!
Posts: 29 | Registered: Nov 2013
Member # 40574
| Posted: 3:16 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
"I love you."
Those are really the only ones I get. She is very quiet most of the time and if there is anything to be said it usually has to start with me.
Me: BH, 35
Her: WW, 36
Two girls 7 & 10
Married 12 years
Dday: July, 2009
She wants answers... I'm still trying to figure out what the questions are.
Posts: 254 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Maine, USA
Member # 35417
| Posted: 8:48 AM, November 17th (Sunday), 2013|
"I'm sorry" is the only unsolicited thing I have ever gotten. And only a few times.
But then, its only been 7 YEARS
"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt
I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy
Posts: 1796 | Registered: Apr 2012
|Topic Posts: 34|