He didn't try for a year? Personally, I'd make him actually try for a year before I even consider it.
I think sometimes the exes get bored, don't have anyone else, have regret (not really remorse), want to see if they still have their hooks in you, etc. I think I would turn down is offers for a while and see how he acts. If continues to apologize, be sincerely sorry, you see actions of change, etc., then maybe think about. But somehow I think a week or two of you saying you haven't seen enough change will make him give up. Again, IDK, just my 2 cents..
Perhaps you could meet a guy that doesn't make you want to define your name as "confused."
Don't rug sweep what you know and what you see. At this point, his sexual orientation doesn't much matter - he's looking for someone, anyone, to cheat with.
This is the second time, which means he knew the pain he caused the first time and decided it was worth the risk to do it again. That is selfish, hurtful and extrmely cruel. He wants to try now because you are taking steps to get out and he's afraid of losing his soft place.
Is this how you want to live? Do you want to always be afraid of him taking to the Internet to find someone else to sleep with? Do you want to become more financially and emotionally tangled to a man who has already shown what kind of husband he will be? It's bad enough to get blindsided, but you would be walking into a marriage with your eyes wide open.
And your little girl - do you want her to learn that this is a good relationship? Do you want her to see that her self worth comes behind that of a partner?
You and your DD are the ones who matter here. This is very hard and I know you're scared, but I would be more scared of staying with him.
He swears he's not bisexual??? But y search for men???
Your WBF is probably a sex/lust addict. My STBXSAH posted on Cragslist for men and women, mostly for oral sex. For a sex addict, a mouth is a mouth, gender doesn't matter.
I decided to D the WSAH I loved because it is an addiction, and addicts fall off the wagon. I cannot go through this again. I will not let my kids grow up thinking this is acceptable behavior.
Only you can determine if you are making the 'right' decision. Good luck.
[This message edited by Gemini71 at 7:22 PM, November 14th (Thursday)]
He is such a good guy. But the lies and creepy behavior.....
Very few people are all good or all bad.
So, your WBF has some good characteristics AND he lies to you AND he exhibits creepy behavior.
Those *additional* characteristics are pretty major and shouldn't be ignored.
IMHO, moving forward with your life is the right decision. Life should NOT be this hard. You shouldn't have to worry that your (possibly)soon-to-be-husband is trolling Craigslist for other men to hook up with......
In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.
I'll never be able to understand the surprise some WSs show when we leave. What the hell did they think would happen when they engaged in this sort of behavior?