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Just Found Out Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Numb, Suicidal, and just scared
Skan
♀ Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 11:42 AM, November 23rd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hey lady, I hope you were able to get some sleep last night. Spend some really good quality time with your kids today. Be kind to yourself. Treat yourself with the care that you deserve. (((hugs)))


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4585 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
Jeaniegirl
♀ Member
Member # 6370
Default  Posted: 1:17 PM, November 23rd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I checked back in this morning, just to check on you. SO glad you have someone there at the shelter to talk to. You are doing the right things in the right way and you are protected. Try to stay positive for your kids and that will help YOU to stay positive. I don't know why but I feel you are going to be just fine and the tests are going to be good. I don't know why I feel this way but I do. You will soon have a new start.

I wanted to let you know I've been offered the opportunity to volunteer at a domestic violence shelter, to help women such as you with immediate legal issues and your situation has convinced me I need to do it as I was waffling (not enough time, etc ..) about doing it. Thank you!


"Because I deserve better"

Posts: 925 | Registered: Feb 2005
StillStanding1
♀ Member
Member # 40144
Default  Posted: 1:48 PM, November 23rd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((teeghan))))

Your situation breaks my heart. You are worthy of so much better than this ba$tard. I am just so very glad you are in a safe place and getting help. I will keep you in my prayers. And your children. They need to be kept away from him FOREVER.

Please, keep posting, and try to get some rest. Eat if you can and drink plenty of water. You will need every ounce of strength.

I am so grateful your H's employer gave you all the evidence you will need for ammunition. Most people are good at heart and sincerely want to help others. I hope that you will let some of those good people in your real life help you and your kids right now. You have lots of support here on SI, but you also need support and real hugs from some good people in your life. Let them reach out to you. You can pay the favor forward some day in your life!!!!

Remember that your babies need you. You are going to be the one to provide them a stable home for their future. I know you feel like your future is bleak right now, but it will get better, the further away from him you get. You ARE strong and you CAN and WILL get through this. You will not let someone this evil do any further damage to you or your kids.

Sending hugs and prayers your way!


Me: 40s BS, Him: 40s WH
M 21 yrs - 3 teens
LTA = 2+ yrs, Dday = 2/10/13, he moved out, he officially moved back in 1/25/14 and our work continues...

Posts: 633 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: MidWest
mychild
♀ Member
Member # 40186
Default  Posted: 1:55 PM, November 23rd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

How wonderful you found shelter. Protect your babies. Your H is dangerous as u know. I hope the judge is a good moral one.

Posts: 80 | Registered: Aug 2013
teeghan
♀ Member
Member # 40859
Default  Posted: 8:05 PM, November 23rd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you all for your support and kind words. It means a LOT and has really helped me today.

I did not sleep a wink last night. Unfortunately I am extremely exhausted. I did however spend some great quality time with the kids today. We cuddled in bed and told jokes, we watched some funny you tube videos as my son LOVES to watch videos like America's Funniest Videos. Then we went to lunch with my best friend and then took them to a place called Sky Zone where they could jump on trampolines for an hour. THen we came back to the shelter, had dinner, ate ice cream, watched a movie and now they are headed to bed.

I tried to be strong today but I broke down and cried a couple of times. It is just so scary to think of what I could have and how someone can be so EVIL.

I did also talk to my doctor today. He called me in medication that treats panic attacks, sedates you to sleep, helps relax your muscles etc. He told me to take one or two a night for the next month and see how it works for me as I am having all kind of panic attacks and can not shut down my brain to sleep.

I am only going to take one a nght but he definitel loaded me up with 60 a month plus 5 refills. Good thing I hate taking medicine.

I also made a list of the things I need to do next week to fight the ba$tard. I am fighting hard and I will make sure he NEVER sees his kids again. We were NEVER married and he has NEVER legitimaized his kids. That is part of my saving grace. He filed for legitimiation and custody AFTER I had him arrested and after I was awarded a perm RO. Now that I have all this other evidence, I was told he had no chance in hell. I hope he rots in hell and I hope KARMA gets him good REALLY REALLY SOON!


And I hope I sleep tonight.


Posts: 111 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: Georgia
AlexFL
♂ Member
Member # 40966
Default  Posted: 9:54 PM, November 23rd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ok listen up....You are alive and you have survived. Get your anger on and meet with the prosecuter and let your voice be heard!! You have children- teach them to never take this bull ever. This is your new legacy, one of a strong woman, a protective mother. Believe in yourself. Find your strength. You are no different than anyone else. You can achieve great things. Let this be YOUR beginning and not your ending. Do not let him control your mind and thoughts. You have inner strength. Dig deep. Put your big girl pants on. It may get rough but u make sure they hear you at that court house. You have purpose. You are here for a reason. It's time to break the cycle.

Posts: 143 | Registered: Oct 2013
Crushed1
♀ Member
Member # 6449
Default  Posted: 10:31 PM, November 23rd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Glad to hear you and the children had a nice day today. Just take each day as it comes and deal with the issues presented. That will help you not feel overwhelmed.

I'm glad you got some meds and hope they are helpful for you. I had severe panic/anxiety attacks for a while and was put on Ativan, it was a lifesaver, I was able to sleep a little and it took the edge off. Sometimes we need a little help from meds to get through such an ordeal. Peace and strength! ((((teeghan))))


~~"You can't run away from yourself"!!! Me to my H when he descended into adultery insanity.
~~Prov.15:13 "By sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken"
~~"The day breaks-your mind aches"
~STRENGTH~PEACE~HOPE~FAITH

Posts: 9654 | Registered: Feb 2005 | From: Texas
Jpapageorge
♂ Member
Member # 31800
Default  Posted: 12:58 AM, November 24th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I tried to be strong today but I broke down and cried a couple of times.

I need to politely disagree with the tone of this statement. Crying does not show a lack of strength, it shows you are human. You made it through last night and you made it through today, that proves to me that you have strength.

Keep going Teeghan, you will get through this.

Jp


"Either get busy livin' or get busy dyin'." (and I prefer to live)
"Shame on me for kissing you with my eyes closed."
Spectemur agendo.
Me: FBBF

Posts: 1698 | Registered: Apr 2011 | From: California
Housefulloflove
♀ Member
Member # 38458
Default  Posted: 2:44 AM, November 24th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Because his behavior includes the idea of and research for murdering you, I hope you never have to see him again, and pray he and his parents do NOT have any kind of contact with you and your children, no matter the circumstances, no matter who is "supervising."

This!

((Teeghan)) I hope that what his job provided you is enough to erase him from your life and your kid's lives permanently! He is obviously a sick and evil man and the extent of his depravity is extreme. You're going to cry and that's a good thing. If you can get through something like that without shedding a tear then something would probably be very, very wrong. The fact that you are away from him and ready to fight for you and your kids lives despite the pain shows that you are incredibly strong!


Me-29 Starting over
ExWH-29 Probable NPD, PA, manchild
3 beautiful young children
DDay 1/20/13 Admits PA
No remorse so NO R. DIVORCED! 9/2013

Posts: 541 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: USA
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 9:09 AM, November 24th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Teeghan - I hope you were able to get some sleep last night.

You may not feel strong, but it is evident to all of us that you are very strong. There is strength in every word you type here. There is strength in every action you have taken to protect yourself and your kids. It radiates off the screen.

I remember the anxiousness and fear I felt while I waited for the STD test results. It's normal to fear the worst. We're all standing with you. Lean on us as much as you need to. ((((teeghan))))


You can call me NIK

Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something.
- Plato


Posts: 24436 | Registered: Aug 2011
Skan
♀ Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 4:39 PM, November 24th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Cryng isn't a sign of weakness. It serves a really good purpose.

1. It helps to relieve stress
2. It gets grief out and expressed
3. Tears can lubricate the soul by reminding ourselves that we are human, not supermen/women

So don't take your tears as a sign of weakness. (((hugs)))


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4585 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
brkn_heartd
♀ Member
Member # 30396
Default  Posted: 5:03 PM, November 24th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You are doing great. As long as you keep your children as your main focus you will do great. The protectiveness and anger of a parent can go a long way.

Prayers for you tomorrow. Stay strong.


Me-50 BS
Him 57-WS
Married 30 yrs, together 33
Affair Aug-Dec 09
official D-12/14/09
broke NC 1/31/10
second D 3/19/10

Posts: 1533 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Northwesten US
teeghan
♀ Member
Member # 40859
Default  Posted: 5:27 PM, November 24th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you all.

I am afraid I may not sleep much tonight just thinking about tomorrow. My appointment is at 10am and I am just so nervous them more I think about it.

I am trying to NOT think about it and to be positive but damn it is so hard........ so so hard.


Posts: 111 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: Georgia
Jrazz
♀ Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 6:11 PM, November 24th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Try to be gentle with yourself as you process this. It's ok to think about it, just redirect if you can.

Sending good thoughts for tomorrow.

(((Teeghan)))


We are what we repeatedly do, excellence, then is not an act but a habit. - Aristotle

Posts: 16426 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
ThoughtIKnewYa
♀ Member
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 6:08 PM, November 25th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just checking in with you. How did today go?

Posts: 11401 | Registered: Mar 2008
PhoenixRisen
Member
Member # 35912
Default  Posted: 6:14 PM, November 25th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am afraid I do not have much more strength in me to fight.

You dont have to fight everyday. Somedays you just need to get through the morning... then the afternoon.. then the night.
When you catch your breath you can fight.
The times you can't catch your breath just hold on. You will have a chance to breath again - it's like being battered in the waves. Just hold on.
Your lawyers, SSW, caseworkers, they can fight on the days you can't.
You are not alone.
Cry, drink water, eat what you can.
((((HHHUGGGSSS))))

Posts: 474 | Registered: Jun 2012
sunsetslost
♂ Member
Member # 39885
Default  Posted: 6:20 PM, November 25th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Teeghan)))


Divorced 7/11/14. New Beginning on the Gulf of Mexico. It's real nice.

Posts: 691 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: The beach.
20Hopeful16
♀ Member
Member # 40487
Default  Posted: 6:22 PM, November 25th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am afraid I may not sleep much tonight just thinking about tomorrow.

That is what the medicine the doctor gave you is for. Take it, let it help you get some sleep. Sleep will help you function better.


Me: BS (39)
Three Beautiful Children 12,9,5
DD: 8/24/13
Heading for divorce
Moving on with life

Posts: 107 | Registered: Aug 2013
painfulpast
♀ Member
Member # 41038
Default  Posted: 6:24 PM, November 25th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You are not alone.

(((((teeghan)))))


It's so easy to believe someone when they're telling you exactly what you want to hear.....

Posts: 1737 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: East Coast
Truly
♀ Member
Member # 40715
Default  Posted: 6:34 PM, November 25th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Hey Teeghan,
Holding you and the children in my thoughts. I hope today went well.

You are being incredibleand I hope you realise that your 40000+ friends here are standing behind you, proud to know we can support such an amazingly strong woman as you.

((((((((((Hugs to infinity and beyond!)))))))))))


There are dark shadows on the earth, but its lights are stronger in the contrast.
Charles Dickens


Posts: 257 | Registered: Sep 2013
Topic Posts: 41
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