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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Little things adding up
Tripletrouble
♀ Member
Member # 39169
Default  Posted: 11:19 PM, November 30th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Some days are more hurt, but today was more anger. Nothing big, just stupid things kept piling up. First all this work at getting my house reorganized now that half the furniture is gone, then I had to rake a billion leaves, the shower faucet broke in the kids bathroom and I realized I no longer have a Phillips head screwdriver(and forgot to buy one while I was buying the replacement piece for the faucet - which didn't work when I got it home), kids needing something every five minutes, and the icing on the cake was stumbling onto some selfies XH took with our computer, no doubt for dating profiles (at least he was clothed). Fuck. When did this become my life? I feel so pissed that all this unwelcome hurt, anger, and drama were dumped into my life. I'm burned out, have no time to myself, am emotionally bankrupted, and will live on 20% of what our combined income was when my CS runs out in a few years. I am pissed. Pissed!! He gets a fresh start in LaLa land and has all the time in the world to sit around counting his money. Yeah yeah he has to live with himself and I get to walk with my head held high, and I have many many blessings (truly, I know I do), but tonight I am just so stinking pissed. Thanks for letting me vent!


40 somethings - me BW after 20 years
D Day April 2013
Divorced November 2013

The sea is so wide, and my boat is so small.


Posts: 553 | Registered: May 2013 | From: A state of overwhelmed
PurpleRose
♀ Member
Member # 33129
Default  Posted: 11:26 PM, November 30th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I hear you. It sucks all around. I needed an Allen wrench today and I don't have one. Damn it.


divorced the Dooosh
*****************************
even if you find your voice,
sometimes it does not matter anymore,
when you speak to a man who is deaf by choice.
~dodinsky

Posts: 3240 | Registered: Aug 2011 | From: ATX
notsosureanymore
♂ Member
Member # 18051
Default  Posted: 12:10 AM, December 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Not laughing at you laughing for you (((Tripletrouble))) I had to rake leaves too... i have all these little Grandmas calling me every weekend to clean up their yards. I'm just too nice a guy) And get this i have a wash cloth hanging over the cracked plastic ball on the shower so it doesn't spray the ceiling and walls! Here with my kids I had to ask myself just earlier this evening When did this become my life
I'm not supposed to be doing this alone all by myself! nice vent! i guess your just what i needed tonight. Eating an ice cream now because in the morning i have to get out of bed and clean it all up. And go rake more leaves. Happy Sunday ((Tt))

Posts: 221 | Registered: Feb 2008
LadyQ
♀ Member
Member # 32847
Default  Posted: 8:34 AM, December 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Tripletrouble, I'm so feeling your pain! I'd like to say "it gets better", but I'm not there yet, so I don't know! As I sit here with a leaking garbage disposal, one of the back fence panels is falling, there are a half-dozen unfinished projects that x started before he left, and yard work that I never seem to get around to. I feel like it surely must get better though. Right? Hang in there! It does get easier! (I think??!!??)


Tune out the noise of what others tell you about who you are and work it out for yourself...

Posts: 1650 | Registered: Jul 2011
Lola7
♀ Member
Member # 41195
Default  Posted: 8:48 AM, December 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

OMG those fucking leaves! I did that yesterday and I'm still not done!

Also, cleaning up dog shit has now become my job. Hooray!!


caelitus mihi vires
"My strength is from heaven"
DIVORCED!

Posts: 211 | Registered: Nov 2013
jemimapd
♀ Member
Member # 37895
Default  Posted: 9:16 AM, December 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Leaves!!!!

We live at the end of a cul de sac/ wind tunnel. The whole road ends up in my yard.

As my ex says, just leave them, they are good for the grass!

I spent a good part of yesterday digging out our fire pit which ex had never emptied since it was built eight years ago. I shoveled out a ton of wet, disgusting gloppy debris, packed it into contractor bags and asked him to put it in the dumpster at his house.

My daughter, as I was digging, said she thought it was a well. Yep, it was lower than the surrounding pavers. A lot lower.

Ex had the grace to look embarrassed when he came over and did take the bags. I was on Aleve by then for my back.

I will text you a pic of my leaves later, TT! You are not alone.


Jemima Puddleduck is a trusting soul....
DD 1 Dec 2012; Divorced 11/13; 2 children
Me: BS (47) Him: WH (52) Her: 3 PA's
Ex bought a house, The Money Pit With Mold That Will Never Be Finished. He's living in the basement.

Posts: 726 | Registered: Dec 2012
k8la
♀ Member
Member # 38408
Default  Posted: 9:22 AM, December 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Check your local pawn shop for tools; you'll find some really nice ones for significantly less than retail.

Posts: 79 | Registered: Feb 2013
jemimapd
♀ Member
Member # 37895
Default  Posted: 9:23 AM, December 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Is there an "I Can Relate" thread for Shit My Ex Left Me To Do With No Tools?


Jemima Puddleduck is a trusting soul....
DD 1 Dec 2012; Divorced 11/13; 2 children
Me: BS (47) Him: WH (52) Her: 3 PA's
Ex bought a house, The Money Pit With Mold That Will Never Be Finished. He's living in the basement.

Posts: 726 | Registered: Dec 2012
honesttoafault
♀ Member
Member # 27105
Default  Posted: 10:26 AM, December 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Is there an "I Can Relate" thread for Shit My Ex Left Me To Do With No Tools

Jemimapad!

Tripletrouble: I hear you!! The toilet has been leaking and I tried to fix it. DS15 decided he wanted to give it a try and well, we had water all over the floor and no tools.

I think we do feel overwhelmed. Not only do we have to deal with MORE everyday stuff, but we end up feeling more hurt and angry as to WHY we have to deal with more.

The only thing I have finally learned is that it is ok to ask for help. We are not superpeople and trying to do it all just gets us more resentful and angry. I used to try to do it all, now I tell the kids they have to help and we do things together. If they complain, I tell them I don't want to do it either!! But we are a family and have to do the good things as well as the bad things.

BTW, I have all those leaves too. LOL, they keep piling up!


Posts: 1903 | Registered: Jan 2010
gardens64
♀ Member
Member # 38449
Default  Posted: 10:42 AM, December 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You know I was feeling the same way yesterday.Toilet is leaking and I don't have the energy to start fixing it. I wonder if it's also a letdown from Thanksgiving. Normally I like little household projects but I was just feeling irritated and overwhelmed... Dont get me started on finances. That really really ticks me off too.

Hugs! You are not alone!


Posts: 54 | Registered: Feb 2013
Tripletrouble
♀ Member
Member # 39169
Default  Posted: 11:01 AM, December 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Not only do we have to deal with MORE everyday stuff, but we end up feeling more hurt and angry as to WHY we have to deal with more.

^^^^ Yes. Yes. Yes.


Not laughing at you laughing for you

^^^^ It certainly helps to have a sense of humor about this whole fuckery.


Is there an "I Can Relate" thread for Shit My Ex Left Me To Do With No Tools?

^^^^ I'll start it JPD! First post, he left me on a wooded lot and took the damn blower to manage his tract home lawn that is made up of about 19 blades of grass.

And what is with all the leaking toilets?? I have one too, and I am dreading that repair.

And the last insult to injury I forgot to add in my first post - the ten lbs I lost after D-day has all found its way back to my ass after having my meds increased to deal with the divorce. Thanks, cheater!! I'm a doped up, overworked, exhausted single mother with pants that are too tight! Awesome! Was hoping this was what 2013 would bring!


40 somethings - me BW after 20 years
D Day April 2013
Divorced November 2013

The sea is so wide, and my boat is so small.


Posts: 553 | Registered: May 2013 | From: A state of overwhelmed
jemimapd
♀ Member
Member # 37895
Default  Posted: 2:42 PM, December 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm a doped up, overworked, exhausted single mother with pants that are too tight! Awesome

I can relate.

But give it time. You are going to leave him standing, I just know it.


Jemima Puddleduck is a trusting soul....
DD 1 Dec 2012; Divorced 11/13; 2 children
Me: BS (47) Him: WH (52) Her: 3 PA's
Ex bought a house, The Money Pit With Mold That Will Never Be Finished. He's living in the basement.

Posts: 726 | Registered: Dec 2012
Strongmama
♀ Member
Member # 33062
Default  Posted: 4:36 PM, December 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh my I feel the exact same way somedays!
I'm sorry. I could have wrote out word by word what
You did. Yes, those rat bastards and all the mess they cause.
I'm exhausted most of the time too, and worry so much about the future and how the hell to start over. It's scary. It's exhausting.
I know things will work out though. It's just so upsetting and overwhelming at moments. I'm sorry, and hope things look up for you soon! I know they will!

Posts: 662 | Registered: Aug 2011
Topic Posts: 13

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