I'm thinking if he doesn't feel it now (and he says he doesn't...well he's never going to feel it.
Maybe you're hurting about this because you want to be loved by someone who can open his heart enough to risk being in love? You say you're satisfied with the amount of time you spend together, and are happy with all but this aspect of the relationship...but there is nothing wrong in wanting to be loved as well as being treated well and being cared for. I don't think it really is about "being in love with being loved", but wanting what you have given, returned. And maybe not having it "all" is no longer enough for you? Or is becoming not enough for you?
Someone recently broke up a new relationship with me because he thought I would fall in love with him and he knew he wouldn't fall in love with me. It hurt, but as time goes on I'm grateful for his honesty...because I really do want it "all"...
You could be right that he has the feelings and just not the words, but is that enough??
Just some ideas to think about...you will figure out what you need, give yourself some time to struggle and be kind to yourself. You're not "desperate" you are human!!