Madhatter here, just wanted to respond to these two questions:
Fake Future and Can't Climax.
Yes, WS's do use this as a way to keep things going. In my situation, I had a 4 week affair with a co-worker who, as it turns out is a WS as well.
She was the individual that would mention this future.
She was 18 years younger than me. There is a lot to my story but I knew there was no future with her, I told her that if my marriage ended, which me just talking to her and hiding it may have been enough to do, I could not be in any relationship with anyone. Trust me, (my -for lack of a better term- moment I seem to have all the time) I have been here before.
My lack of good judgement allowed me to convince myself that it was somehow safer because she was married, during the initial phase of my A that is. For her, and I cannot speak for her just her actions, it was a romance that was meant to be. I know how fleeting initial honeymoon phases can be in any relationship. Once I learned of her wayward side, I ran. Moved out of my apartment, moved in with my sister, cut off all contact, left my job for a step down position, have been going through months of EXTREME remorse, guilt and attempting R. The list goes on and on, PM me if you want details and I can post my responses wherever appropriate. My story is long and character limit sensitive.
So yeah, before I ran I gave in to the PA. This by far is my most embarrassing, regretful moment. For approximately 7 days. I say approximately because I was drinking heavily, which I blamed for my inability to climax? I don't really believe that, I told her that is what it was but I knew it was my mind, my body rejecting this behavior. 3 of the 5 times we had intercourse I literally passed out. Part from my inebriation and part from just giving up.
Throughout my A I climaxed once. This was with my BW, now a WW herself, hopefully fWW as I consider myself to be a Recovering fWH although I am a work in progress.