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Newest Member: LostinBluseas (45054)

Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: buh bye
BAB61
♀ Member
Member # 41181
Default  Posted: 8:21 AM, December 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He's packing as I type. He's going to move up to NY to stay with a friend. I just asked if he was going to see OW from Aug '13. he said no ... lololol

He admitted to 10years of affairs this afternoon when I told him I wanted a divorce since he couldn't be honest with me and I found the second affair.


Boss A** B*tch
BS/52 Me, STBXpos/56, dd's 16&14
1st D-day 10/19/2013 EA/PA
2nd D-day 12/7/2013 LTA/Rendezvous
S 12/7/2013 No-fault state, 6 mo S, counting down the days.

Posts: 1271 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: DE
devistatedmom
♀ Member
Member # 24961
Default  Posted: 8:40 AM, December 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It sounds like you are standing strong Bab. You have made your decision and he knows you aren't playing games. Just remember to look after you this weekend. Water, food, water. Then some more water.

Hopefully he gets that you won't be his puppet anymore while he does whatever he wants.


BS(me) 46, Two wonderful teens.
He is no longer my best friend. Repeat until it sticks.

WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.


Posts: 5513 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: Canada
Take2
♀ Member
Member # 23890
Default  Posted: 9:09 AM, December 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


BAB, this works well for you. Don't have to see his face - no physical target present when the rage hits. My X did something similar, fessed up to Multiple A's, delivered in monotone. Sorting through it all is hard. Take care of your needs, be gentle with yourself.

And change the locks after he goes (you can say it is for safety reasons, a woman living on her own...) Right now he is likely in shock, when he thinks things through and consults a lawyer he may change his mind and move back in.

First thing you want to secure is sole use of the house and CS. But for now stay silent:

"Never interrupt the enemy when he is making a mistake!" Bonaparte

eta: you have the option of filing for fault in Delaware... document those facebook exchanges before they disappear - which will be very very soon!

[This message edited by Take2 at 9:12 AM, December 7th (Saturday)]


"We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us." Joseph Campbell...So, If fear was not a factor - what would you do?

Posts: 4113 | Registered: May 2009 | From: New England
BAB61
♀ Member
Member # 41181
Default  Posted: 9:40 AM, December 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I already thought of changing the locks ... as soon as he's gone I'm going to Home Depot! Great minds!


Boss A** B*tch
BS/52 Me, STBXpos/56, dd's 16&14
1st D-day 10/19/2013 EA/PA
2nd D-day 12/7/2013 LTA/Rendezvous
S 12/7/2013 No-fault state, 6 mo S, counting down the days.

Posts: 1271 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: DE
newlysingle
♀ Member
Member # 38735
Default  Posted: 11:21 AM, December 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm glad you're being strong too. I agree with seeing an attorney ASAP and getting exclusive use of the home. You can change the locks, however he could still get a locksmith to open it for him. Just be aware of that.


BW - Me (37)
XWH - (37) The Gnat
OW - Some dumb whore he picked up in another state and moved here here. Known as Hello Kitty.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (5), 1 DS (1 year)
Dday 3/13
Divorced 9/20/13

Posts: 902 | Registered: Mar 2013
BAB61
♀ Member
Member # 41181
Default  Posted: 9:21 PM, December 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I took pictures of the fb messages, and have them in different areas. Since he is out of the house at least until Thurs I have some time. I will be talking to the Vet Center tomorrow, and the JAG too to find out what I can do and can't do. Since he left voluntarily today, I may be able to use that against him. I'll find out more after some sleep. Monday can't come soon enough.


Boss A** B*tch
BS/52 Me, STBXpos/56, dd's 16&14
1st D-day 10/19/2013 EA/PA
2nd D-day 12/7/2013 LTA/Rendezvous
S 12/7/2013 No-fault state, 6 mo S, counting down the days.

Posts: 1271 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: DE
Topic Posts: 6

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