I'm sure none of that even resonates with him, that just a few yrs ago he was marrying someone else on that ship.
I'm here, trying to finish up paying off the marital debt on my cc, budgeting every dollar to pay my atty for the D, wondering if I really should have spent that 70 dollars I saved to spend nye with my BFF, and he's going on a cruise.
I'm really trying for mental nc, focusing on good things in my life, but this hurts. Why a cruise, why that ship? To me, it's super weird, I'd stay away from a cruise. But as I said above I guess it's just about vacation and fun, not about that.
I feel like I've read about this, WHs that do the same or similar things as they did in their marriage. Why? And how does that not bother you?
Ugh. Hoping tomorrow is a better day.
Unfortunately, it all takes time. I still backslide all the time and let him get to me, but with each slip up, I get a little stronger.
I'm hoping to be able to afford my own place (or a place with a roommate) in the next 6 months or so, and then I will take her, which I know will still be hard for her as she's used to the other cats and with me she'd be alone all day.
I just need to get more money saved up first in case anything happens with the house in terms of repairs as it's still being rented out. Hopefully we'll be able to sell it. I just couldn't afford that plus all of the debt. Thankfully I've been steadily paying on that and it's now manageable.
All of these little ties make it hard. When I go into his place, I see all of the things we bought together. Dumb stuff like the sponge holder in his sink was the one I bought for my first apartment. I threw it out, I guess he took it when he moved his things. I know it's mine because of the crack that's in it from when I dropped it 8 yrs ago. It's all so weird to me. Who keeps a cracked sponge holder? He also took my trash can from college. It's definitely a more female trash can. Why not just buy your own sponge holder and trash can?
Trying not to think about it, just focusing on good. I don't mention these things to him as I'm trying to speak only about the house. Just venting here I guess as you all understand.
I know my situation could be far worse and I'm grateful it isn't. I know I don't sound grateful right now, but I constantly remind myself that it's not as bad as it could be and I need to appreciate that hugely.
Telling you to stay strong and focus and keep your head up doesn't really help you. All it is, are words that don't really help the feelings that your dealing with.
Surround yourself with genuine friends and people whom you trust. Get out there and start living. xoxox