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Newest Member: saltairnc (45082)

Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Excited to finally be an official " R" poster
iwillNOT
♀ Member
Member # 40605
Content  Posted: 4:15 PM, December 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well, it has taken me a while to get here, but my WH and I have finally committed to R! Actually, he has wanted it all along, but I have been balanced on the fence. It's been four months of watching his actions, processing through the hemorrhaging-pain-continuously-everywhere stage, checking and checking and checking again...

I finally feel comfortable making the commitment to work on our marriage and move forward from here. I still have bad days and am still riding the roller coaster, and I know that will continue for some time. But, I feel happy with this decision. Today at MC we talked about me being ready and about my requirements for R. All went well, so...onwards!

[This message edited by iwillNOT at 7:13 PM, December 11th (Wednesday)]


Me: BS, 43
Him: WH, 44
Together 21 years
Married 14 years
Kiddos 2,6,8,10
Dday#1 2004, 3 years after EA/PA co-worker MOW
Dday#2 8-6-13, 13 months EA/9months PA with co-worker MOW - caught not confessed
Rugsweep now, pay later. Ask me how I know.

Posts: 510 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Midwest
TheAmazingWondertwin
♀ Member
Member # 40769
Default  Posted: 4:32 PM, December 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That's wonderful news! I am so happy to hear that you took your time and made certain It was what you wanted.
It sounds like you are in a good place.
Welcome fellow poster!!


Everyday is a new day, some good, some bad.
Me- BS 39
Him- FWS
14 years- 2 middle school children
DDay- 07-24-2013
NC broken from August 6- 24, 2013
Avalanche of Truth on November 14, 2013
Length of A: June 10th to Dday- with broken NC

Posts: 474 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: East Coast
sisoon
♂ Member
Member # 31240
Default  Posted: 6:49 PM, December 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


fBH (me) - 70 (22 in my head), fWW (plainsong) - 65+, Married 45+, together since 1965
DDay - 12/2010
Recovered, not yet fully R'ed
I share my own experience because it's the only experience I know, not because I'm a good model.

Posts: 10167 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: Chicago area
unfound
♀ Member
Member # 12802
Default  Posted: 7:20 PM, December 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

welcome.


ka-mai
*******************
From time to time, I do consider that I might be mad. Like any self-respecting lunatic, however, I am always quick to dismiss any doubts about my sanity. DK

Posts: 14852 | Registered: Nov 2006 | From: mercury's underboob
Skan
♀ Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 8:57 PM, December 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Welcome! I'm happy that you're here!


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4857 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
iwillNOT
♀ Member
Member # 40605
Default  Posted: 9:55 PM, December 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks guys! I am happy to be moving forward, finally! And scared too, if I am honest. Lots to risk.

I choose to try. I hope he proves to me that it was the right decision.


Me: BS, 43
Him: WH, 44
Together 21 years
Married 14 years
Kiddos 2,6,8,10
Dday#1 2004, 3 years after EA/PA co-worker MOW
Dday#2 8-6-13, 13 months EA/9months PA with co-worker MOW - caught not confessed
Rugsweep now, pay later. Ask me how I know.

Posts: 510 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Midwest
HardenMyHeart
♂ Member
Member # 15902
Default  Posted: 11:02 PM, December 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am happy for you and your H. Welcome!


Me: BH, Her: FWW - Long Term EA/PA
d-day: June 25, 2007
Married 30 years, Reconciled

Inner peace begins the moment you choose not to allow another person or event to control your emotions.


Posts: 5668 | Registered: Aug 2007
karmahappens
♀ Member
Member # 35846
Default  Posted: 10:10 AM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Congratulations!

It can be frightening, but any risk is.

Just go slow, continue to talk together and mend fences.

Listen to your gut, know when you need something it's ok to ask.

And always be true and good to you.

We are all here, there will be bumps, but it can lead to a wonderful new life.

(((hugs)))


“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

Posts: 3822 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Massachusetts
JanaGreen
♀ Member
Member # 29341
Default  Posted: 10:26 AM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Welcome and good luck ((HUGS))


We're both in our 30s. One awesome 4-year-old daughter.

Posts: 6778 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: Somewhere in the South
lordhasaplan?
♂ Member
Member # 30079
Default  Posted: 10:29 AM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Welcome to the bumpy neverending process of R. we are all here for each other.


D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
No life should be passively relinquished due to the toxicity of others and taking steps to protect yourself may very well be the most important steps you will ever take.

Posts: 1903 | Registered: Nov 2010
iwillNOT
♀ Member
Member # 40605
Default  Posted: 2:15 PM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks for the welcome and all the kind words


Me: BS, 43
Him: WH, 44
Together 21 years
Married 14 years
Kiddos 2,6,8,10
Dday#1 2004, 3 years after EA/PA co-worker MOW
Dday#2 8-6-13, 13 months EA/9months PA with co-worker MOW - caught not confessed
Rugsweep now, pay later. Ask me how I know.

Posts: 510 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Midwest
Topic Posts: 11

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