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User Topic: strange phone call
90Worthless90
♀ New Member
Member # 39855
Default  Posted: 6:09 PM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So about an hour ago he received a call. The call wasn't attached to a name. It just said 'north Carolina'. I asked him who it was and he told me it was probably a wrong number. He put it on speaker and it rang. Eventually it went to a recording saying that the person had not opened a voice mail. I believed him that it was a wrong number because he gets phone calls from people asking someone he does not know.

So a little while later another number calls. This time it was from a number from Massachusetts. The OW is from there. He took the phone and rejected the call. I asked him who it was and he said it was the same number from a few minutes ago. He did not know I saw the number before he grabbed the phone. I told him I know he is lying and asked him who it was again and asked it it was her. He said he does not know if it was her or not as he does not know her number by heart. I asked him to call the number back on speaker like he did when the other number called a few minutes ago and he refused. He said if it is her, he does not want to talk to her.

After about an hour passed he could tell something was wrong and asked me what's the matter. I told him that I don't care if she called you or not. It's the fact that he lied about it when I asked him. He then tells me that he lied because he did not want a fight about it again and that he is tired of all of the distrust....

I don't know what to think.


Me: 23

Him: 29

Together 6 years.

DS: 2yrs

Ow: 18 at the time. Our son's "God sister"

Doomsday: November 2nd 2012. A couple of days before our sons birthday


Posts: 28 | Registered: Jul 2013
Starfish1973
New Member
Member # 41389
Default  Posted: 8:06 PM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Be cautious.


Married 11 years. Together for 14
Female, age 40. WH is 47.
DD, aged 6
Found out about affair November 1, 2013
Info is only trickling in :-( it was a long affair.

Posts: 15 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: Canada
JustWow
♀ Member
Member # 19636
Default  Posted: 8:15 PM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

he lied because he's tired of all the distrust??????

Really???

Stay stealth, hun.


BW - Reconciling

edited for typos (I always have to!)


Posts: 3636 | Registered: May 2008 | From: Midwest
nomistakeaboutit
♂ Member
Member # 36857
Default  Posted: 8:38 PM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm pretty sure I'd have to get to,the bottom of that phone call.


Me: BH 58.........Her: WW 45
DD: 8..........DS: 5
Married for six years.
DDay: 12-25-11 Divorced: 7-15-12
...................................
"It's like a nightmare within a nightmare, which in and of itself is a nightmare!"

Posts: 963 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: U.S.A.
90Worthless90
♀ New Member
Member # 39855
Default  Posted: 9:14 PM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I just went through his phone while he was sleeping and he deleted the call from the log...


Me: 23

Him: 29

Together 6 years.

DS: 2yrs

Ow: 18 at the time. Our son's "God sister"

Doomsday: November 2nd 2012. A couple of days before our sons birthday


Posts: 28 | Registered: Jul 2013
Hope2B
♀ Member
Member # 40474
Default  Posted: 9:22 PM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He then tells me that he lied because he did not want a fight about it again and that he is tired of all of the distrust....

Too freaking bad that he is LYING. A man tells the truth and faces up to things.

He's tired of the distrust??? Seems like he earned the distrust.

I read a couple of your other posts. My alarm bells and whistles are going off.

As Starfish said, be cautious.


Me: early 60s
Him: 65 yrs old, LTA w/a pro$titute
Married since 1980, no children
DDay: Feb. 25, 2013
Trickle Truth Days: Sept 10, 11, 13, 15 (2013)
His affair--says it was only 8 times 1x/mo, then found out it was 7 YEARS 2-3x/mo or maybe ever 4x/mo

Posts: 360 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: out west/west coast U.S.A.
PurpleBirch
♀ Member
Member # 39170
Default  Posted: 9:49 PM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

In my experience, deleting a call from the log is a very, very bad thing. Like, an admission of guilt.

((worthless))


Me: BS (32)
Him: WH (31)
Married 3 years.
Confessed to PA April 21 2013.

DS (6), DS (18 months)

Aug 30 2013 He gives me back his ring with an ultimatum: "Get over it or get out".

Status: Done like dinner


Posts: 277 | Registered: May 2013 | From: The frozen North, eh?
brokendancer7
♀ Member
Member # 39911
Default  Posted: 12:36 AM, December 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He does not know her number by heart?! Right. Just like my H wasn't sure what the password to his Gmail account was. You know, the one where he saved all his texts from OW. Why do they have to lie like that?

(((90Worthless90)))


Me: BS - 58
Him: WS - 56
Married 34 yrs

Latest DD - April 2013, PA


Posts: 197 | Registered: Jul 2013
Tearsoflove
♀ Member
Member # 8271
Default  Posted: 12:43 AM, December 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He then tells me that he lied because he did not want a fight about it again

Ask him how that worked out for him?


"Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand." ~Homer Simpson


Posts: 4156 | Registered: Sep 2005
Ostrich80
Member
Member # 34827
Default  Posted: 1:06 AM, December 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't believe he doesn't know her number by heart if he didn't, how did he know it was her when she called. The fact that he deleted makes me think he doesn't want u having access to it. Be on alert...


BS..me
WS..him
Been with him over half my life
4kid
DD1 10-01-09 DD2 02-12-12 discovered it never ended
OW..nothing special. Just your average skank
Status..#$%@????

Posts: 5167 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: midwest
Jrazz
♀ Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 1:07 AM, December 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

tired of all of the distrust....

Um, so he just UNproved his trustworthiness by not doing the call-back exercise.

I'm so sorry 90W. There's no way he's not full of it. I wish he could get that covering his ass instead of being honest is a one-way-ticket to this getting worse. Sending hugs.


Cherish those who seek the truth but beware of those who find it. - François-Marie Arouet

Posts: 17889 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
SummerStorm21
♀ Member
Member # 41320
Default  Posted: 4:06 AM, December 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That is awful! He is lying and turning it around on you.

I'm sorry. I know it's maddening.

Hugs.


BW

Posts: 112 | Registered: Nov 2013
TrustGone
♀ Member
Member # 36654
Default  Posted: 6:55 AM, December 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Lots of red flags flying on this one. I am sorry but do not let this go. He was trying to cover his ass, so that means he has something to hide. My WH#2 pulled the same BS right before DDay#3. I dug and he finally admitted she had texted him and then he tried to call her back 3 times late one night to tell her to leave us the hell alone. She never answered and he didn't text her or try to contact her again. It is just so infuriating that they try to turn this around and complain about our lack of trust. Just keep your eyes open. (((HUGS)))


BW-50
WH#2-51
M-9 yrs T-11 yrs
4 children-none together
DD#1-9/5/11 LTA 2yrs
DD#2-7/3/12 False R
DD#3-4/29/13 (OW broke NC)
Status: Your guess is as good as mine.

Posts: 2420 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Texas
I think I can
♀ Member
Member # 17756
Default  Posted: 7:14 AM, December 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This one stinks. I'm very sorry.


I'm not the winner, I'm the prize.

Posts: 8829 | Registered: Jan 2008
90Worthless90
♀ New Member
Member # 39855
Default  Posted: 11:27 AM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

o yesterday I started questioning the phone call. I eventually demanded to see his phone and he refused. I then remembered that I had access to his phone account. He does not know I have access to it. I logged in and saw a number from 413 area code in the text messages from yesterday. I grabbed his phone from him and looked through the phone and didn't see any texts from the number and I accused him of deleting them which angrily denied.

I look at the account again and realize that I was looking at the records from several days ago and that the number was from one of his friends from Puerto Rico.... I looked through his phone account and for the past few months all of his calls are to and from his family in Puerto Rico, his brother in P.A, me, and his job... No calls/texts from or to that number. chat includes text messages...

Now I feel bad and I also made myself look dumb


Me: 23

Him: 29

Together 6 years.

DS: 2yrs

Ow: 18 at the time. Our son's "God sister"

Doomsday: November 2nd 2012. A couple of days before our sons birthday


Posts: 28 | Registered: Jul 2013
marionwendy
♀ Member
Member # 41303
Default  Posted: 11:36 AM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

OMG!!!! My Husband deleted every damn call! He has an I phone so my youngest son told me how to go back and get the number ... I then called it myself ... got no answer so I texted it pretending to be my WS and BINGO! I then texted her from my phone telling her there would be no more contact and that me and my two boys would be happy to come over and talk to her husband!


BS-49
WS-50
Married-18
Together-21
Children-2

Life is not measured by the breaths we take
but by the moments that take our breath away.


Posts: 217 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: canada
StillGoing
♂ Member
Member # 28571
Default  Posted: 11:42 AM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You didn't make yourself look dumb, he made himself look suspicious for refusing to give you his phone and deleting shit. For all you know he was using a calling app that doesn't register on the phone records.

If he wasn't hiding anything he wouldn't be so pissed off and unwilling to share.


"You have insulted my footwear."

Posts: 7495 | Registered: May 2010 | From: USA
90Worthless90
♀ New Member
Member # 39855
Default  Posted: 12:37 PM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Do those exist? I have full access to his phone. When I looked through his phone while he was sleeping, I searched pretty thoroughly. I searched all of his apps. Messages and phone logs. I also checked the history on his browser. Nothing. He also isn't very tech savvy. I don't think he would have thought to use an app like that. I don't think he even knows how to buy apps.

For now, it looks like my suspicions were wrong. But I will definitely keep an eye out.


Me: 23

Him: 29

Together 6 years.

DS: 2yrs

Ow: 18 at the time. Our son's "God sister"

Doomsday: November 2nd 2012. A couple of days before our sons birthday


Posts: 28 | Registered: Jul 2013
kra127
Member
Member # 41045
Default  Posted: 12:44 PM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes there are apps that let you have private texts and there are also apps that you can hide pictures, texts and emails in. I searched through my WHs old phone and uncovered an app that looks like its an "audio manager" app when in reality it's used to hide pictures, videos and anything else you don't want others to see. The "audio manager" was just a fake name so it wouldn't look suspicious. Look for something like that.


Me 40
WS 39
2 young kids, Married 10 yrs
OW 22, admitted to EA and then TT to PA two weeks later. Also, found out about several "friends".
Dday 10/8/13
Divorcing

Posts: 97 | Registered: Oct 2013
Razor
♂ Member
Member # 16345
Default  Posted: 1:12 PM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I just went through his phone while he was sleeping and he deleted the call from the log...

That alone is all the proof you need. It was from her or he would not have deleted it. If it was from someone else there would have been no need.


Forgive and forget = Relive and regret.

Hope in reality is the worst of all evils because it prolongs the torments of man.
Friedrich Nietzsche


Posts: 3483 | Registered: Sep 2007
Topic Posts: 20

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