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Newest Member: Alaris999 (44601)

Just Found Out Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: All My Fears Confirmed
toomanyregrets
♂ Member
Member # 37740
Default  Posted: 8:06 PM, January 11th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You might as well read the e-mail.
If it's good then there's hope.
If Not, then you need to show her you mean what you said and start to move on.


BH - 64
fWW - 59

"Affairs are not mistakes, they are a series of deliberate choices." - CrappyLife


Posts: 453 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: Upstate NY
mike7
♂ Member
Member # 38603
Default  Posted: 8:52 PM, January 11th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

she blew off the date.

regardless of what she says in the text, if you suck up to her now she will never respect you for the rest of your life.

ask yourself why she purposely didn't respond on your deadline. She didnt' because she's letting you know that you're not the boss, she is.

She'll let you know what she's going to do when she's good and ready and not before. And you're going to like it!

honestly, if you cave to this nonsense, I don't have much hope for your happiness with this woman.

the only way you can let her back is if she comes back to you blubbering, snot-nosed, mascara running, begging for forgiveness. otherwise, you're just her plan B while she makes up her mind.


BH 53
WW 52
Two kids 21, 18

DDay 1/15/2013


Posts: 537 | Registered: Mar 2013
Twitchy
♂ Member
Member # 25393
Default  Posted: 10:24 AM, January 13th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Stanley, How's it going, man. What happened?


BH(me)-49, FWW-43,
D-Day #1 - Oct 2007 - On-Line EA leading to a failed rendez-vous
D-Day #2 - Nov 2008 - In person EA caught early.

Away you will go, sailing in a race among the ruins.
If you plan to face tomorrow, do it soon. Gordon Lightfoot


Posts: 618 | Registered: Sep 2009 | From: Ontario - Canada
trojan007
♂ Member
Member # 36960
Default  Posted: 11:34 AM, January 13th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Stanley hope you're okay, keep updating buddy

[This message edited by trojan007 at 11:35 AM, January 13th (Monday)]


Posts: 56 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Valencia, CA 91355
stanley
♂ New Member
Member # 41695
Default  Posted: 12:45 PM, January 14th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I had a four hour conversation with her and my take away from it was that she has climbed back on the fence. She says she still loves me, but is afraid of ending it with him! She doesn't want to clean the crap from the sole of her shoe because she's afraid that she will be asking herself the rest of her life "what if" he's the one
I told her where she could pick her stuff up at and that I don't want her in my life anymore because I don't want to wonder "what if" I might find some one who loves me unconditionally and wants ME in their life! I told her I am taking what's left of my dignity and self-respect and I will share it with someone who I can trust and will treat me with respect and dignity!
I don't know what the cheaters handbook says will happen next. I do know her well enough to know that she will be too proud and arrogant to right this wrong. She will get thrown under the bus, ran over and kicked to the curb before she see's her head stuck up her ass and finally admits her mistakes!
I am so broken by this and so very sad, but I have faith and hope that love and happiness will find me again. Win the day one day at a time!

Posts: 13 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: NorthWest
Twitchy
♂ Member
Member # 25393
Default  Posted: 3:18 PM, January 14th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You're not broken. You're just terribly hurt. But it's like taking the bandage off all at once rather than millimeter by millimeter. (I'm Canadian)

Now you can go no contact and be proud that you did all you could to save things, she just couldn't see that.

No Contact = No New Hurt.

Don't worry about what she does or what she's thinking. Just worry about you and your beautiful children.. Let this wound heal. It will take alot of time.

And BTW. You did great.


[This message edited by Twitchy at 5:31 PM, January 14th (Tuesday)]


BH(me)-49, FWW-43,
D-Day #1 - Oct 2007 - On-Line EA leading to a failed rendez-vous
D-Day #2 - Nov 2008 - In person EA caught early.

Away you will go, sailing in a race among the ruins.
If you plan to face tomorrow, do it soon. Gordon Lightfoot


Posts: 618 | Registered: Sep 2009 | From: Ontario - Canada
movingforward13
♀ Member
Member # 38405
Default  Posted: 11:58 AM, January 15th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

By not choosing you, she chooses him... So give her exactly what she wants.

Sometimes the best punishment is to give someone exactly what they asked for.... And then not being there for them when they realize how wrong they were.

No contact. Do not contact her for any reason. Do not respond to calls, texts, or emails. Tell her to talk to your attorney.


Once a cheater, always a cheater happens when your cheater doesn't have remorse.
Regret is not remorse- know the difference!

Posts: 636 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: DC
jb3199
♂ Member
Member # 27673
Default  Posted: 1:32 PM, January 15th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't know what the cheaters handbook says will happen next. I do know her well enough to know that she will be too proud and arrogant to right this wrong. She will get thrown under the bus, ran over and kicked to the curb before she see's her head stuck up her ass and finally admits her mistakes!

See, you DO know the cheater's handbook! That is exactly what happens.

She is telling you what she wants, and that is to continue the new status quo. I will assume that this doesn't sit well with you(as it shouldn't), so your choices now are to either (1) accept it, (2) or not. I believe that option #2 will suit you better.

Keep moving forward, away from this mess. The further you get away from infidelity, the better things will be for you. Trust us.


BH-46
WW-44
2 boys-17 & 20(special needs)
Married 21yrs.(together 27yrs.)

All work and no play has just cost me my wife--Gary Puckett
D-Day: 9/18/09 D-Day#2: 2/19/10 The Marriage Killer: 6/6/11
Heading for D


Posts: 2031 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: northeast
Topic Posts: 108
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