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Wayward Side Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Enjoying the "Theme Park"
AceKnight
♂ New Member
Member # 39832
Default  Posted: 1:20 AM, December 18th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My BS and I are looking at divorcing. Right now we are at a crossroads that we are not able to fill the needs of each other. Other people are now filling or have been put in a position to fill those needs of comfort, safety, release, understanding, and fun.

My past of allowing my affairs to meet those needs that I had felt were unfulfilled in my marriage seem to hard to overcome.

The feeling can be similar to one spouse feeling the other spouse enjoyed the thrills and spills of Disneyland until the park closed and the firework show was over.

Now the other spouse has an entered the park and start enjoying what Disney has to offer; the spouse that has been to Disney is telling the other spouse to come out the park because it isn't any good.

I have been to Disney and now my BS is now in Disney herself looking to enjoy what it has to offer now that she is in the park.

Instead of being in a position for us to hurt each other, it seems the best option is to divorce and move forward. If either one of us chooses to enjoy "Disney", we can do it free of obligation or choice.

Thanks for any responses.


Posts: 18 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: California
JustDesserts
♂ Member
Member # 39665
Default  Posted: 6:52 AM, December 18th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I kind of need a translation here.

Which rides, exactly?


2 year EA/PA. DDay 3/12. Broke NC 6/13 w/one stupid 5 line e-mail (which brought me to SI). Me: WH, 50. Her: BW, 49. Married 19 years. Two kids. Dog. Reconciling...together.

Posts: 403 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Suburbia, New England, USA
20WrongsVs1
♀ Member
Member # 39000
Default  Posted: 7:48 AM, December 18th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I responded to your other thread as well.

Whether you're the BS or the WS, you need to decide if you want to reconcile (R) or divorce (D). If you want to R, sit down with your wife and ask her where she sees herself in 5 years. If it's with you, happily by your side, then she needs to get the fuck out of Disneyland and not get her hand stamped, because she can never go back. Neither of you can. Are you ready to commit to life, forever, without Disneyland? If you can't promise that to yourself and your BS, then D.

Decide what you want. Both of you. Then act.


fWW: 42
BH: 52
Sweet DS & fierce DD, under 10
"Between stimulus and response there’s a space, in that space lies our power to choose our response, in our response lies our growth and our freedom." V. Frankl

Posts: 1037 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Redneck land
Topic Posts: 3

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