The place started to fill up. I noticed I was the only woman in the place. Then the thought came....if I wanted to meet a guy this would be a good place to hang out.
I was so ashamed of myself. I felt the need to look only at my table or out the window to avoid any possible temptation. How did I get here?
I wouldn't be worried or ashamed unless you were really contemplating hooking up with someone there. Like, you know, grabbing them and hustling them into the bathroom. .
Lighten up a little soconfusednow! If it becomes a pattern of escapist thinking, then you have something to worry about.
[This message edited by bionicgal at 2:15 PM, December 18th (Wednesday)]
I edit, therefore I am.
It's good to acknowledge when we have unhealthy thoughts, and to tell them to shush. You're not a bad person, you're just in a new headspace and need to learn how to deal with the emotions. You're going to be ok.
Sadly though, I too wonder how in the world did I get here, of all places?
if I wanted to meet a guy this would be a good place to hang out... I was so ashamed of myself.
I'm sorry you felt ashamed. I think you just noticed the environment. You recognized a slippery slope without jumping onto it. That's reason to celebrate your observational skills and integrity.
His betrayal of me was not because I didn't shine brightly enough, but because he chose to put on blinders.