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Newest Member: tryingtolove (44683)

Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: whine, whine snifffle... hugs, please!
thebighurt
♀ Member
Member # 34722
Default  Posted: 11:22 PM, December 18th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((Caregiver)))) My Mom had a measure for how important things are: If it isn't something that people will remember and talk about in 100 years, then it isn't worth worrying about and making yourself sick over. So don't stress about things you can't get done.

Taking care of you and healing are the most important things. You are lucky to have offers of help, so accept graciously. As others have said, you are Caregiver, now it's your turn to receive the care. We would all be there for you, too, if we were near enough. Good mojo and vibes being sent to you to replace the bad ones.

Cry and scream all you want to us. We're here for you. Hugs to you, too, ((Jessica))).


Finding what life could have been....... Why didn't I see it?

Posts: 2245 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: the Other Side
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 3:41 AM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Big hugs for you my friend.

I'd be down for NGs JuJu shooing away ceremony.

Sending you healing vibes.

(((((((((((((CG))))))))))))))))


Buzz- The word you are searching for is 'Space-Ranger.'
Woody- The word I'm searching for, I can't say, because there are Pre-school toys here.

Posts: 5532 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
JessicaFL127
♀ Member
Member # 26864
Default  Posted: 5:39 AM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good morning! I hope you feel better today. Happy Thursday!


BW,32
divorced for 6 years
mom to two awesome boys,10 and 9

"But you said your vows, and you closed the door
On so many men who would have loved you more" -Cath, DCFC

"The most amazing things can come from some terrible lies"


Posts: 1244 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Missouri
JessicaFL127
♀ Member
Member # 26864
Default  Posted: 5:43 AM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

And thanks everyone for the secondary hugs. I'm sorry that I semi threadjacked; it was not my intention. I feel a little better now that I got some of it out, so thank you.


BW,32
divorced for 6 years
mom to two awesome boys,10 and 9

"But you said your vows, and you closed the door
On so many men who would have loved you more" -Cath, DCFC

"The most amazing things can come from some terrible lies"


Posts: 1244 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Missouri
caregiver9000
♀ Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 6:18 AM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Jessica, you did NOT jack my thread! Group hugs are even better. Thanks for checking on me this morning. I hope we both have a good day.

To all the over night (for me) juju chasing and healing vibes and energy, love and kindness- thank you!!!

I wish I had a nickel for every time I had been told I don't have to be Wonder Woman. And that THAT voice would drown out the one that says I am lazy and not up to par.

I am working today, so I will try to stay positive and careful and not over do. I will carry SI in my heart.


Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5766 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
ninebark
♀ Member
Member # 24534
Default  Posted: 6:18 AM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Caregiver9000, I so understand what you are going through.

Three years ago I was taking my son to his swimming lessons when I missed the bottom step on my stairs. I fell, twisted my right ankle, righted myself and broke my left leg. I ended up having to go into surgery to repair it and was off for quite a while. This happened right before Christmas and my ex and were trying to R at the time.

He worked out of the province so most of the time I was alone trying to take care of things, trying to Christmas shop and taking care of an 10 year old. It wasn't easy and it is so hard to be dependent on others.


So know you are heard, understood and hugged. It is frustrating but it will get better and will be stronger for it. In my case my broken leg lead to a new job so it worked out for the best. I hope it works out for you as well in the end.

Try not to be so hard on yourself and have a nice Christmas. (((hugs)))

[This message edited by ninebark at 6:18 AM, December 19th (Thursday)]


BS (me) 40
WH - 48
Married 12 years
DS - 12
D-day 06/21/09
Separated....hopefully divorcing soon.

Posts: 630 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Canada
WeepingBuddhist
♀ Member
Member # 39139
Default  Posted: 7:14 AM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((caregiver)))

Sendingyou some good vibes and letting you know that you can get through this.


Me: BS 46
Him: unimportant
D Day:4-27-13
DIVORCED!!! 2-20-14

Posts: 559 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Columbus
woundedby2
♀ Member
Member # 18522
Default  Posted: 7:47 AM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((((CG))))))))

There couldn't be a worse time of the year to be laid up. It's hard enough to avoid feelings of inadequacy and stress even when you are fully functioning!

I also wish I could magically appear at your doorstep to help out. I hate that one of my favorite peeps is hurting.

More hugs...

((((CG))))


Me: BS
2 kids: DD15 and DS18
Him: The Assclown NPD
OW: "friend" of 15 years
Divorced! Feb. 2010

Everybody, soon or late, sits down to a banquet of consequences.
~Robert Louis Stevenson


Posts: 7799 | Registered: Mar 2008 | From: SoCal
Griefstricken25
♀ Member
Member # 29183
Default  Posted: 9:00 AM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((((Caregiver9000)))))


Me!
3 amazing kidlets
To WXH "Now you're just somebody that I used to know." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9NF2edxy-M
D-day and separation - June, 2009
Divorced - December, 2011

Posts: 2505 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: A better place
ajsmom
♀ Member
Member # 17460
Default  Posted: 9:07 AM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Nothing worse than losing a wheel.

(((caregiver)))

Hang in there, and continue to eat the elephant one bite at a time.


AJ's MOM


Fidelity isn't a feeling...it's a choice.

"Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always." - Albert Schweitzer
____________________________________________
Me: BW - Him: 200+ # tumor removed 7/09
DS - 31 - Yikes!


Posts: 21039 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: Been Through Hell...On My Way Back
hexed
♀ Member
Member # 19258
Default  Posted: 10:11 AM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((CG))

vent/whine away you've earned it. that's alot.

don't worry about presents. they are just things. celebrate christmas on 12/29 or something if you need to.

just focus on you. don't add stress. people understand!


But that's just a lot of water
Underneath a bridge I burned
And there's no use in backtracking
Around corners I have turned

“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.” -foulton oursler


Posts: 8438 | Registered: Apr 2008
welcome14
♀ Member
Member # 26741
Default  Posted: 10:29 AM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((cg))! i feel ya, broke my left shoulder 3 weeks ago. yup, getting in n out of cars is a nightmare. i am also lefthanded, and i was supposed to start a new job 2 days after my fall. luckily they cant fire me even though i will be missing my first 6 weeks. sigh.I also know how u feel about that dang step. i get a little sick feeling when i go down mine also. good news is, we have people that care about us and are willing to show us their love, we just have to allow ourselves to accept and remember that it makes them happy...i can be stubborn also...hope u are better today, and don't over do it!


Nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home- nikki sixx

I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.


Posts: 1169 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: clarksville, tn/ Ft Campbell
Edie
♀ Member
Member # 26133
Default  Posted: 10:38 AM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Big hug to you Care, you are such a caring person, I hope you can feel the care coming your way over the wire. I hope you are feeling better about everything soon.

((((Care))))


Maybe a long walk in the Hindu Kush would do it?
BW (me) 52
FWS 55
Together 29 years; 2 DDs 15 & 12
Dday Dec 08 (confessed) Feb 09 16 other OW confessed. OW17 tried her unedifying hardest until Aug 09. R'd.

Posts: 5056 | Registered: Nov 2009 | From: UK
caregiver9000
♀ Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 3:19 PM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

ninebark, I can imagine that fall and I grimace every time I read it!! I think stairs should be outlawed...

wb, you are one of my favorite peeps too! Thanks for the love.


Hang in there, and continue to eat the elephant one bite at a time.

Good advice.

welcome14, your wing, my wheel. I am also left handed, so if we did a two legged race type bonding, I could manage the left side if you can take up the right?? Misery loves company and all that, so thanks for chiming in.

To EVERYONE who took the time to hug, reassure, send care and good vibes, I really really feel the love. Thank you for the permission to whine, the validation that this does kinda suck, and that it will pass, and I will survive.

I am moved, and supported by the responses. This is one of those threads I want to print and carry around so I can read it any day I feel down.

I feel like my best friends have the most unusual names....

Thank you!!!!!!


Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5766 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
welcome14
♀ Member
Member # 26741
Default  Posted: 3:29 PM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

excellent idea! we could almost be one whole person! glad u sound a little better today...one day at a time! (and i dont have to clean the house...lol)


Nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home- nikki sixx

I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.


Posts: 1169 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: clarksville, tn/ Ft Campbell
DeadMumWalking
♀ Member
Member # 25341
Default  Posted: 3:39 PM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sending belated hugs ((((cg))))


Me (BS), Him (WH): early 50's
3 DS: teens!!! :)
M: 24 (19 1/2 at Dday), Together 29
Dday: Dec 2008
re-separated (in-house), for good (??) <-- should really remove these, shouldn't I...

Posts: 2545 | Registered: Aug 2009 | From: EU
caregiver9000
♀ Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 3:56 PM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

DMW, hugs are never too late!!

thanks for sending them on.


Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5766 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
rainagain
♀ Member
Member # 14917
Default  Posted: 10:31 PM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh! Just saw this.

((((((((Care))))))))

My dd broke her leg years ago and she sounded just like you (yes you're an 8 th grader).

But really the panic and pain was the same - she said I helped her through it but all I did / said was the usual mama things. You know that routine, so tell it to yourself.

As far as gifts let this make you feel better. I. Have. Not. Started. Yet. And I have two ankles.

I get the dependent thing so try to think of it this way - being injured like this as a single working mom is a really big deal. And you are still a single working mom who is now severely - thank god temporarily - injured. So really, you are actually kicking one -legged ass which is twice as good as the usual.

Love ya!


Now, faith is being sure of what you hope for and certain of what you cannot see. Heb 11:1
I done been through the pain and the sorrow the struggle is nothing but love. Maino
Me: Divorced BS 49
DS22, DD19, DS17

Posts: 1293 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Massachusetts
Jrazz
♀ Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 10:33 PM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((caregiver9000)))


If you can't learn to enjoy your life when you have problems, you may never enjoy it because we'll always have problems. - Joyce Meyer

Posts: 16975 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
Chrysalis123
♀ Member
Member # 27148
Default  Posted: 10:40 PM, December 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Get well soon...((((cg))))))


Don’t get to the end of your life and find that you lived only the length of it; live the width of it as well. 

Posts: 2628 | Registered: Jan 2010
Topic Posts: 43
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