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Newest Member: brierpatch (45434)

Wayward Side Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: letter to my bh
Alyssamd24
♀ Member
Member # 39005
Default  Posted: 11:44 AM, December 24th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Since dday #1 I have been thinking of writing a letter to my bh..I have constantly put it off though cuz I didnt know what to say or how to say it.

Since it is Christmas eve and 3 days away from our first antiversary I have finally written the letter to my bh...I am going to give it to him tonight after celebrating Christmas eve with his family.

I am nervous to give it to him but am glad I finally wrote it...I hope reading it will make him feel a little better and make the next few days a little easier on him.


"I need to be redeemed to the one I've sinned against because he's all I ever knew of love"

Posts: 879 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Massachusetts
Kelany
♀ Member
Member # 34755
Default  Posted: 12:22 PM, December 24th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think this will be wonderful. I've always appreciated heartfelt notes from my husband.


BS - Me
SA/FWH Him
DDay 1 - Jul 11
DDay 2 - Jul 12
R Dec 12

Former 80s Icon wishful thinking


Posts: 2031 | Registered: Feb 2012
numb&dumb
♂ Member
Member # 28542
Default  Posted: 12:28 PM, December 24th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Alyssamd24

I still carry a letter my W wrote to me earlier on in R. Something about it stuck with me. If I was in a bad place, I was able to pull it out and read it.

Writing things out allow the thoughts and feeling to be explained a little clearer and the reader can take time to absorb the contents.

Be sincere. Read it to him aloud and then give it to him. You'd be amazed how such a small thing can really be a great tool for healing.


Me-35 her-35

DS 1, DD 6
Dday 8/31/11. ONS that occurred 3 years earlier. Lied to for 3 years.

Every truth comes to light in a long enough timeline.


Posts: 2568 | Registered: May 2010
Brandon808
♂ Member
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 12:51 PM, December 24th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I commend you for taking that initiative. Speaking as a BH who never got such a letter I only wish my wso had shown that kind of remorse.


xBH
D final 8/2012

Posts: 4007 | Registered: May 2012 | From: southeast
Skan
♀ Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 3:39 PM, December 24th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My FWH doesn't write much at all, so when I receive a letter from him, I treasure it.


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4962 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
lostcovenants
♀ Member
Member # 40637
Default  Posted: 3:44 PM, December 24th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What a wonderful idea. I would give every present under the tree with my name on it for such a letter. I pray he receives it in the spirit you are giving it in.


BS 60; fWH 59; 2 children, 1 grandchild; Married 37+ years, he is my only; D-day 7/8/13; MOW, PA 2009-?. Broke it off about a week before I found out. Sexting on cheating forums 14 YEARS. Idiot me. STATUS UPDATE - SEPARATED :-(

Posts: 167 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: USA
kabee
♀ New Member
Member # 37816
Default  Posted: 9:58 AM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I can relate to Brandon808. My WH could barely write an nc letter to the OW let alone a heartfelt letter to me. Your letter will be a wonderful gift. It is considerate. I guess that was all I was looking for was some consideration. I never received it. You are on the fright track. Merry Christmas!


BW 49
WS 50
Married 21 yrs.
2 yr LTA
Many other indiscretions
D-Day #1 9/14/12 D-Day #2 10/9/12
Gaslighting the whole time until final contact on 12/24/12
Tried R
Now trying D

"The grass is only greener where you water it."


Posts: 25 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: kabee
Skan
♀ Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 12:40 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So, how did the letter go?


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4962 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
Alyssamd24
♀ Member
Member # 39005
Default  Posted: 8:23 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The letter went over really well...I gave it to him last night after our DD went to bed....he didn't say much about it, just read it and said "thank you for that". I could tell though by the way he said it and the way he looked after it had touched him.


"I need to be redeemed to the one I've sinned against because he's all I ever knew of love"

Posts: 879 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Massachusetts
AML04
♀ Member
Member # 39682
Default  Posted: 11:08 AM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What a beautiful gift.


Me-BS Him-WH DS 5/12
Met 2000, Married 2004
DDay 5/26/13, TT through 8/13
2.5 yr EA w/co-worker, PA 12/12 to 4/13
Hopeful for R

Posts: 875 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: MA
wifehad5
♂ Moderator
Member # 15162
Default  Posted: 11:09 AM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


FBH - 42
FWW - 43 (BrokenRoad)
2 kids 7&12

The people you do your life with shape the life you live


Posts: 37461 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Michigan
Kap12
♀ Member
Member # 41759
Default  Posted: 2:56 PM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Great idea!!

Posts: 61 | Registered: Dec 2013
Topic Posts: 12

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