I've found these books really helpful:
Hold Me Tight - working on right now - so far, very good to do together once the pain is no longer so intense. We attempted it early on and it was way too soon. Recently picked it up again.
Getting Past the Affair - we tackled this with our MC early on. There were times when I just couldn't go there and would have to set it aside for a while. But it's one of the best books I've found on getting past the affair.
Janice A. Springs' book got me through the first week after discovery.
Harville Hendricks books are great - insightful man. His Getting the Love You Want is a good read to do together
as is the 5 Love Languages
Healing After The Affair, Steven Stosny - extremely helpful for the betrayed. I discovered this guy's blog on Psychology Today and couldn't get enough of him. You gotta take his book slowly because it is chocked full of exercises - but man, he is good. Really helped me gain a sense of control. He's all about developing a healing identity, living out your core values. Good stuff.
That little book for Waywards about Helping Your Spouse Heal was good for both of us - I felt it articulated my experience and my husband read through it twice. He felt it gave him greater insight.
I have mixed feelings about Anne Bercht's book. I've not read it, but I've kept up with her website and webinars. I suppose her husband's affair is the best thing that's ever happened considering the two of them are traveling the world and making some very good money doing workshops for affair recovery. Just not sure how I feel about that. They were in my area this fall, but command $1500 for their time. Yikes!
As for Dr. Phil, I actually read his Relationship Rescue book years ago when I was feeling that something was off in my marriage. Yep, now I know that was during my husband's affair. Boy, was I on my own with all that or what? I sort of remember thinking it was good info, but I couldn't get my husband interested in all that I was reading. Duh!