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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Wedding Anniversary today
newlysingle
♀ Member
Member # 38735
Default  Posted: 5:17 PM, January 5th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Last week it had crossed my mind that not only did I suffer through the holidays, but that I was also going to have to face my anniversary. Then I forgot all about it until lunchtime today. I took the kids out for brunch and as I was signing the check, I noticed the date and felt that pang of sadness. However, it was brief for some reason and I decided that I wanted to mark this day as special in another way.

DD and I had discussed removing her training wheels recently, so I suggested we do it today. She was a little apprehensive, but we started in the grass and she took off. She was so ready, that it literally took just a few minutes to get the hang of it. We spent the rest of the afternoon outside riding and the neighbor girl came over and played. That was a big deal for DD as neighbor girl is rarely there since it is just a vacation home for them. All in all a great day and I'm so proud of DD. I'm also proud of myself for doing one more milestone with the kids without his help. I can do this! I don't need him!

Hopefully, I won't be a sobbing mess when night falls, but I'm feeling good right now. Today is no longer my anniversary, but the day DD rode on two wheels.


BW - Me (37)
XWH - (37) The Gnat
OW - Some dumb whore he picked up in another state and moved here here. Known as Hello Kitty.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (5), 1 DS (1 year)
Dday 3/13
Divorced 9/20/13

Posts: 924 | Registered: Mar 2013
GotPlayed
♂ Member
Member # 41294
Default  Posted: 5:29 PM, January 5th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((newlysingle))

That is the most creative way to replace a memory I've heard yet. Makes me wish I hadn't removed the training wheels off my DD's bike!

We're all proud of you here as well.
Having forgotten about it until mid-day is a great sign I think.

Holidays were hard on me, though I'm doing better, and luckily I don't have to face my anniversary until mid-year, still have a few months.

Maybe I'll go skydiving. That will be a jolt that I'll remember!


Master of my Fate, Captain of my Soul.
BS 42, WW 41. 18y married
DD: 11/5/13
DS10 Autism, DD8
OM: Reformed wife-beater ex-con
D filed 1/14/14 by WW (never warn them, they'll get ahead)
Married a powder keg

Posts: 755 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: California
badmedicine
♀ Member
Member # 41692
Default  Posted: 6:36 PM, January 5th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I love this!!! I don't have kids but the image of you reclaiming the date with DD and the symbolism of finally being brave to take the training wheels off...and then riding freely like she could have before.....I have goose bumps. Are you sure you didn't make this up??

Way to go, newlysingle.


"The wishbone will never replace the backbone." -Will Henry
"This wasn't just plain terrible, this was fancy terrible. This was terrible with raisins in it." -Dorothy Parker

Posts: 208 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: United States
Pass
♂ Member
Member # 38122
Default  Posted: 8:03 PM, January 5th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm also proud of myself for doing one more milestone with the kids without his help. I can do this! I don't need him!

You should be proud. You're a frigging rock star!

Even if you do end up a sobbing mess tonight, you felt great for most of the day, and you found a way to keep feeling great. Feeling shitty later doesn't rob you of those good hours from earlier.


Loyal spouse: Me; Disloyal spouse: The Princess
Two sons: Now 11 and 14
DDay: Nov 15, 2012
Separated: Mar 2, 2013 after 17 year marriage, now divorcing!

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous


Posts: 2112 | Registered: Jan 2013
PhoenixRising88
♀ Member
Member # 35214
Default  Posted: 8:06 PM, January 5th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

oh yea newly!!!!!! Atta girl!!! So proud of you. and congrats to DD on ditchin the training wheels!


Me: BS (43)Him: EX, aka "The Dink"(50)
D-Day#1 12/22/11. D-Day#2 5/23/2013.

Divorce final 2/10/14.

Throw me to the wolves and I'll return leading the pack.


Posts: 429 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: North Texas
Nature_Girl
♀ Member
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 8:19 PM, January 5th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I love the intentional transformation of your thoughts. Well done!


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - I DIVORCED HIM, I'M FREE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBOJpIwF47Y

Posts: 9829 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
BAB61
♀ Member
Member # 41181
Default  Posted: 8:51 PM, January 5th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yay, gives me hope .. we were in False R when our marriage anniversary occurred, we did nothing to commemorate it ... should have been my first clue that it was false ... smh ...

(We had 2 anniversaries - marriage due to Desert Shield, and wedding after Desert Storm. ugh ... 2 dates to ignore! lol

I love that you changed the date into something your dd can celebrate! wtg!


Boss A** B*tch
BS/52 Me, STBXpos/56, dd's 16&14
1st D-day 10/19/2013 EA/PA
2nd D-day 12/7/2013 LTA/Rendezvous
S 12/7/2013 No-fault state, 6 mo S, counting down the days.

Posts: 1271 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: DE
newlysingle
♀ Member
Member # 38735
Default  Posted: 9:37 PM, January 5th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks everyone. I'm honestly shocked that I wasn't depressed and morose all day. I've felt that way daily since about Dec. 15th. I did give myself a little pep talk yesterday about trying to be in a better mood for the kids' sake. Maybe it actually worked. I'll just take it for what it is and not be too hard on myself if I feel miserable again tomorrow.

GotPlayed - go skydiving! I think that would be a great way to change the anniversary. I'd do it if I wasn't such a chicken shit.

Bad medicine - no making it up! She was really ready though. She's had a lot of anxiety about taking the training wheels off even though she was hardly using them anymore. It took a little pushing on behalf of myself and the neighbor girl, but she took to it right away. I posted the video on FB and everyone was really proud of her. Also it was a beautiful 68 degrees in Phoenix today, so we had to be outside. I'm feeling so bad for those stuck in those arctic temps around the country.

BAB61 - I know exactly how you feel. Last year i sent him a text telling him happy anniversary and what a great H he was. Yeah, I got no response. He was in Asia for work and I bet OW was with him. He got home two weeks later and I got the ILYBINILWY speech. I then discovered the A in early March. The more I think about it though, he was usually away for for every anniversary and didn't do much to acknowledge it anyway. Maybe that's why today wasn't as painful as I'd imagined?

[This message edited by newlysingle at 9:38 PM, January 5th (Sunday)]


BW - Me (37)
XWH - (37) The Gnat
OW - Some dumb whore he picked up in another state and moved here here. Known as Hello Kitty.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (5), 1 DS (1 year)
Dday 3/13
Divorced 9/20/13

Posts: 924 | Registered: Mar 2013
TrustGone
♀ Member
Member # 36654
Default  Posted: 7:37 AM, January 6th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My XWH#1 and I got married for the second time on Christmas eve. This year after 10yrs it never even crossed my mind until the next day that yesterday was mine and Ex's anniversary date. One day hopefully you will get there too. (((HUGS)))


BW-50
WH#2-51
M-9 yrs T-11 yrs
4 children-none together
DD#1-9/5/11 LTA 2yrs
DD#2-7/3/12 False R
DD#3-4/29/13 (OW broke NC)
Status: Your guess is as good as mine.

Posts: 2420 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Texas
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 7:44 AM, January 6th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Today is no longer my anniversary, but the day DD rode on two wheels.

Love this. Love it.


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5609 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Topic Posts: 10

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