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Newest Member: Chivalrous (45316)

Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: some hard answers coming tonight
♀ Member
Member # 41825
Default  Posted: 7:10 PM, January 9th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

StillStanding, we saw a MC who is supposed to be the infidelity expert in our area. She allowed me a whopping 45 minutes to ask all questions - and that 45 minutes included him answering. Isn't that absurd? 45 minutes to take apart a 15 month long affair! She said once time was up, I wasn't to pursue any more answers from him.

It really is amazing to me how MCs differ. We eventually went with another MC and he encouraged us to leave the affair in the past. Focus on the present. So when we weren't in MC, we'd go round and round with me asking questions, typing up questions, texting questions, blah blah blah. It's taken almost two years and I finally feel like I know all I care to know.

The late Peggy Vaughn was such an advocate for asking questions. She would always emphasize that it was actually the WS's willingness to answer questions (rather than the specific answers) that was so critical.

Don't know why it's so hard to get WSs to talk details.

Me: BW (47), WH (48)
Married 24 yrs, 2 teenagers
DD#1 01.20.12 When diagnosed w/STD
Told it was 15 mo. PA that ended 6 years ago
DD#2 04.06.14 Truth: PA was 2yrs/8mo
Separated for 6 weeks
Reconciling and healing now

Posts: 201 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: southeast USA
♀ Member
Member # 38384
Default  Posted: 8:06 PM, January 9th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Happy for you eachday. I remember when I first wrote you - I was impressed by the positivity of your name. And that same positivity is present in your last update.

Yeah...I remember when I found out H had sex in her van. I laughed at how absurd it was. Truly.

Hope you have a good sleep tonight

Me: 44
He: 47 WH
Married: 15 years
D Day: December 2012
Affair: Fall 2009 - Dec. 2011
R is not linear

Posts: 2432 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Canada, eh
Topic Posts: 22
Pages: 1 · 2

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