His friend, B, met his wife, C, through my husband, A. A and C met each other online via another mutual friend and hit it of VERY well. This was in 2008. They used to chat constantly...she even started phoning him over weekends...
Everytime I entered the room, A would close the laptop or log off the chat site. I found an sms from C on his phone one day..."what is wrong...why aren't you online yet?". This upset me terribly. I was on maternity leave at that time. I told him that I don't like their friendship and he told me I was paranoid. He made me believe I had post natal depression. Even went to a psychologist for treatment.
By March 2008, I begged him to end the friendship...said I didn't trust her intentions. He reacted by yelling..."Do you honestly think I would throw away our marriage of 4 yrs, our relationship of 11 yrs, our family...for someone else? If you can think that of me, YOU must be busy behind my back and now you have a guilty conscience!" I cried hysterically. ..he made me feel so bad for asking that I landed up apologising to him!
The irony is that, as I found out in 2012, he had in fact already cheated on me by having a ONS with my best friend since primary school...while I was pregnant!
I don't know what would have happened between A and C if B didn't start a relationship with her. Point is...I classify this as an EA. My fwh thinks it wasn't that bad. Putting on a polite happy face when I see her at a social gathering is obe thing, but expecting me to camp with her for 10 days is another!
Am I being rediculous? How should I handle this?
But yeah, that sounds like an EA. Since FWH's ea, he has no single female friends. Any female friends he has, has to go through me.
[This message edited by steadfast1973 at 5:18 AM, January 10th (Friday)]
[This message edited by Frankie80 at 5:53 AM, January 10th (Friday)]
I edit, therefore I am.
(Then again, I am having a hard time doing anything with any other couples other than family members right now.)
Considering our family went on a family vacation with MOW and her family during the A....
And this seems like a time to talk about and work on healthy boundaries and to explore the concept of friends of the marriage.
Married for over 15 years
2 beautiful boys in elementary school
You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them. Maya Angelou