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User Topic: Well I guess a new Dday...
cl131716
♀ Member
Member # 40699
Angry  Posted: 12:19 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I found imlive on the phone in the web browser history. It's a sex chat/webcam site. As well as youporn but I'm not sure how long ago either were accessed. I knew about the porn but he promised he never did chats or webcams. Yuck.


Me BS 31
Him WS 34 Trying4change
Together 3 years, married for one
D-day: 07/23/13 cybersex with COW
D-day: 12/27/13 found out he met and kissed a "friend" in 2011
"A clear and innocent conscience fears nothing."

Posts: 935 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Oklahoma
UpInTheAirNow
♂ Member
Member # 37777
Default  Posted: 12:29 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The live chats sometimes pop up automatically usually after you click on a video. Are you ok with watching porn?


ME 44
WW 50
DDay 6/13/12
Married 17 years, together 27 yrs.
Its a deal breaker!

Posts: 98 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: NY
cl131716
♀ Member
Member # 40699
Default  Posted: 12:39 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That's what I thought too but we have a popup blocker plus it showed 17.3KB of usage (?) in the website data. I'm not sure...

I used to be okay with porn but now it's no longer allowed since he was having issues with excessive use.


Me BS 31
Him WS 34 Trying4change
Together 3 years, married for one
D-day: 07/23/13 cybersex with COW
D-day: 12/27/13 found out he met and kissed a "friend" in 2011
"A clear and innocent conscience fears nothing."

Posts: 935 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Oklahoma
UpInTheAirNow
♂ Member
Member # 37777
Default  Posted: 12:47 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Double post.

[This message edited by UpInTheAirNow at 12:48 PM, January 10th (Friday)]


ME 44
WW 50
DDay 6/13/12
Married 17 years, together 27 yrs.
Its a deal breaker!

Posts: 98 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: NY
UpInTheAirNow
♂ Member
Member # 37777
Default  Posted: 12:47 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I too have pop up blocker but it still pops up anyway. Why not just ask. It might be something old and not recient.


ME 44
WW 50
DDay 6/13/12
Married 17 years, together 27 yrs.
Its a deal breaker!

Posts: 98 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: NY
Kibou
♀ New Member
Member # 41996
Default  Posted: 12:52 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

To be fair, 12.3KB is very small. I haven't known chats to start up automatically at porn sites, but it's possible. Maybe you should see for yourself if it does. This person does not sound trustworthy. Did you know about his issues before you married?


Me: BGF
Him: WBF
OW: coworker
D-Day: 11/23/13
Proposed: 1/1/14, now engaged

Posts: 8 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: United States
one2ndchance
♀ Member
Member # 14759
Default  Posted: 12:53 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

but he promised he never did chats or webcams.

He also promised fidelity on your wedding day.

i used to be ok with porn, but it seems like too many viewers of porn become desensitized to it over time. They then look to up the experience by increasing the types of porn, or wanting more real interaction (via chats) and then progressing to wanting actual sexual involvement. Studies have shown how porn affects the brain and the responses show similarity to other forms of addiction.


Me: BW 59
Him: STBXWH 61
Married: 25 years
DDay1: 2/2002; DDay2: 6/2012
Gave him his second chance and he blew it.
Divorcing

Posts: 479 | Registered: May 2007 | From: California
cl131716
♀ Member
Member # 40699
Default  Posted: 1:06 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Kibou- it's at the top of the list for usage but maybe I'm reading it wrong. I don't know. I tried going to some of the pornsites and nothing popped up but it's possible. I do plan on asking him when he gets home.

And I knew he watched porn when we started dating, I didn't know he was into sex chats which is basically the form of infidelity I am dealing with only it was with people he knew IRL.


Me BS 31
Him WS 34 Trying4change
Together 3 years, married for one
D-day: 07/23/13 cybersex with COW
D-day: 12/27/13 found out he met and kissed a "friend" in 2011
"A clear and innocent conscience fears nothing."

Posts: 935 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Oklahoma
cl131716
♀ Member
Member # 40699
Default  Posted: 1:09 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Onesecondchance- Yes! That's pretty much what I'm dealing with although I don't think he ever went physical other than a peck. I have no evidence of him ever having a PA although there were situations where it could have taken place.


Me BS 31
Him WS 34 Trying4change
Together 3 years, married for one
D-day: 07/23/13 cybersex with COW
D-day: 12/27/13 found out he met and kissed a "friend" in 2011
"A clear and innocent conscience fears nothing."

Posts: 935 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Oklahoma
Whalers11
♀ Member
Member # 27544
Default  Posted: 1:10 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

If it helps... I just checked my browser history because I visit YouPorn from time to time and there are no web addresses that I don't recognize in my history, and I do get those annoying pop-ups.


Me: BGF - 33
Together 11+ years - not married, no children.
D-Day: 2/9/2010
OC Born: 10/9/2010
Status: He chose OW/OC and left immediately.

Posts: 2180 | Registered: Feb 2010
cl131716
♀ Member
Member # 40699
Default  Posted: 1:13 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Okay Facebook, google, and yahoo were at the top of the list ranging from 300-700 KB which makes sense because I use them a lot. He rarely accesses this phone, it's usually with me. I've never looked up porn on here, however!


Me BS 31
Him WS 34 Trying4change
Together 3 years, married for one
D-day: 07/23/13 cybersex with COW
D-day: 12/27/13 found out he met and kissed a "friend" in 2011
"A clear and innocent conscience fears nothing."

Posts: 935 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Oklahoma
cl131716
♀ Member
Member # 40699
Default  Posted: 1:34 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I guess all I can do is ask.


Me BS 31
Him WS 34 Trying4change
Together 3 years, married for one
D-day: 07/23/13 cybersex with COW
D-day: 12/27/13 found out he met and kissed a "friend" in 2011
"A clear and innocent conscience fears nothing."

Posts: 935 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Oklahoma
cl131716
♀ Member
Member # 40699
Default  Posted: 2:02 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I tried an experiment. I took a screenshot first so I had proof and then I deleted the website data for that site. I went to the website for only a second and then checked the website data. It was only .3 KB. So much for it being a popup.


Me BS 31
Him WS 34 Trying4change
Together 3 years, married for one
D-day: 07/23/13 cybersex with COW
D-day: 12/27/13 found out he met and kissed a "friend" in 2011
"A clear and innocent conscience fears nothing."

Posts: 935 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Oklahoma
steadfast1973
♀ Member
Member # 24719
Default  Posted: 2:25 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My h looked the "live cams", but never chatted. You have to pay to chat. (And, also most of the girls on the cams are not who is chatting, lol... The people chatting are sitting being a desk in a call center environment in india...) and it's usually not live, unless you pay a fee too...

Also, if he even clicked on a video, it would be way higher than 17.kb... My h usually just looked on the main screen with the animated gif links... It's really all you need, he said.

[This message edited by steadfast1973 at 2:28 PM, January 10th (Friday)]


Me- 40- BS Him- 36- WH D-day#1 5/25/09 3 mo. EA d-day#2 11/06/13 Prostitute 11/5/13 in R
"I've seen your flag on the marble arch, our love is not a victory march, it's a cold and broken hallelujah."- Leonard Cohen

Posts: 2241 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: Midwest
cl131716
♀ Member
Member # 40699
Default  Posted: 2:32 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Steadfast- that is too funny! I should tell him that. I spoke to him a min ago and asked about it but he swears he didn't know what if was. Could be a popup thing I suppose. He admitted to watching youporn however but it was before he swore it off. I guess it's not a big deal. I told him I wouldn't be mad just wanted to know.


Me BS 31
Him WS 34 Trying4change
Together 3 years, married for one
D-day: 07/23/13 cybersex with COW
D-day: 12/27/13 found out he met and kissed a "friend" in 2011
"A clear and innocent conscience fears nothing."

Posts: 935 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Oklahoma
steadfast1973
♀ Member
Member # 24719
Default  Posted: 4:46 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

But. I did get a web cam popup looking at the hustler shopping site for some "marital aids". As well as a pop up for backpage. (The "craigslist for hookers".)


Me- 40- BS Him- 36- WH D-day#1 5/25/09 3 mo. EA d-day#2 11/06/13 Prostitute 11/5/13 in R
"I've seen your flag on the marble arch, our love is not a victory march, it's a cold and broken hallelujah."- Leonard Cohen

Posts: 2241 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: Midwest
cl131716
♀ Member
Member # 40699
Default  Posted: 4:58 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ugh this still isn't sitting right with me. I looked again and two sites I frequent only had 12 KB. I know I was on those sites quite a bit! Also, sites I searched, read a few pages, and left are more around the .4 KB. I'm not tech savvy so I really don't know what that means. I may be overanalyzing but for some reason it doesn't feel right.

Yeah I do remember getting popup banners, steadfast. Never porn related though unless I am on a porn site.


Me BS 31
Him WS 34 Trying4change
Together 3 years, married for one
D-day: 07/23/13 cybersex with COW
D-day: 12/27/13 found out he met and kissed a "friend" in 2011
"A clear and innocent conscience fears nothing."

Posts: 935 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Oklahoma
cl131716
♀ Member
Member # 40699
Default  Posted: 5:00 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I wanted to mention there was an m before the web address which stands for mobile. Not sure if that means anything.

I am thinking he did just look because I watched a short clip and it went up to 1.3
Still why would he lie? He admitted to looking at ypmate once and it's the same thing!

[This message edited by cl131716 at 5:09 PM, January 10th (Friday)]


Me BS 31
Him WS 34 Trying4change
Together 3 years, married for one
D-day: 07/23/13 cybersex with COW
D-day: 12/27/13 found out he met and kissed a "friend" in 2011
"A clear and innocent conscience fears nothing."

Posts: 935 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Oklahoma
steadfast1973
♀ Member
Member # 24719
Default  Posted: 5:12 PM, January 10th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yeah, I don't get pop ups on the computer, but on my ipad, I do.

My h's 4g data was like 2,000,000, watching porn. Streaming Videos use a lot of data.

[This message edited by steadfast1973 at 5:14 PM, January 10th (Friday)]


Me- 40- BS Him- 36- WH D-day#1 5/25/09 3 mo. EA d-day#2 11/06/13 Prostitute 11/5/13 in R
"I've seen your flag on the marble arch, our love is not a victory march, it's a cold and broken hallelujah."- Leonard Cohen

Posts: 2241 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: Midwest
Topic Posts: 19

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