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User Topic: My life feels like an episode of Jerry Springer
Furious1
♀ Member
Member # 42970
Default  Posted: 8:06 PM, April 21st (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have been thinking about you today. I'm sorry that you've had to deal with all of this. I know today can't be easy. I hope you are doing okay.


BW (me): 41 WH (him): 49
Married 18 years. SD: 26 from his 1st. M. DS: 21 from 1st M. DD: 17 (autistic)
D-day: 10/4/13 with ongoing TT (last TT was 10/2/14).
2 OC with 2 different OW. 15 year A with my sister.

Posts: 324 | Registered: Apr 2014 | From: United States
iamsoblind42
♀ Member
Member # 42022
Default  Posted: 4:59 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi Everyone.

It's been a couple months since my last post and I know many of you are still really struggling. I wanted to post today to maybe give you all some hope that you can come out of this Hell.

For those that have followed my story I wanted to let you know that I am REALLY HAPPY!!! Honestly, have not been this happy in years.

I feel like I have found ME again and I realize now looking back how my WH picked me apart for years.

I think I even posted once how he told me that one of our good friends had supposedly told him "well, who does she think she is going to get?, Look at her." That comment stuck in the back of my head for 7 years.

I ran into that friend a few weeks ago and flat out asked him... his reply... "I swear I never said that and I know I never would because I always thought you were gorgeous." Can't believe I believed that for so long. He really did kill my self esteem over the years.

I have been dating a little and that is weird but fun. Dating in your 20s, guys had no money to take you on real dates. Dating in your 40s... much better : ) Nice dinners, concerts and actual chemistry.

Kids are doing great too. I really do think they see how you react and act accordingly. If you yell and scream or cry all day they are going to internalize. Show them you're happy and they will be happier because of it.

XH and I get along fine for the kids. Try to limit communication to texting, seems to do best but we are very amicable in regards to switching dates with kids etc.

Only real struggle I guess I have is the XBF. I ran into her at the gym the other day. I was so angry that she did not leave when she knew I was there. The lack of respect for my space and lack of remorse just kills me. It's a really small gym with a giant chalkboard for inspirational quotes. I walked over and wrote in huge letter "EVERYONE KNOWS YOU SUCKED MY HUSBAND'S COCK" and walked out. I know it wasn't very mature but I felt better.

I texted her later for the first time since everything happened and asked her to please find another gym. Told her it was the least she could do. We'll see what happens there.

Found out that XBF and her husband are renewing their wedding vows... how sweet. I've thought about sending them a bottle of Menage a Trois.

I want to thank you all again for helping me through my hell and I hope you all have peace and happiness in your lives too.

Just remember, life is too short to wallow in despair. I have watched too many good friends waste years of their lives. If we only get one life try to live it! Honestly your X is not worth it! Much love my friends!

[This message edited by iamsoblind42 at 5:07 PM, June 24th (Tuesday)]


I'm a survivor, I'm gonna make it, I will survive, keep on surviving...

BS: me 42
WH: 48
2 kids
Married 18 years
D-day - 1/11/14
Filed - 1/16/14
Divorced 4/21/14
Walked in on WH and BF while her H watched


Posts: 209 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Colorado
yearsofpain25
♂ Member
Member # 42012
Default  Posted: 5:17 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

BLIND!!! Excited to see you doing so well!! Fantastic news!

"EVERYONE KNOWS YOU SUCKED MY HUSBAND'S COCK"

OMG!!! That's awesome! Your confidence and attitude has come so far! Love it! Where;s the head explode emoticon from too much laughter.

Send the bottle of Menage a Trois. Least you cold do.

Great to see you out and about.

yop


25 years and counting of pain caused by mother's infidelity. Aftermath: 1 deceased sibling, 1 lost family, 3 lost souls.
"Each new day I am just glad to be alive and have survived all that I did." Ashland13

Posts: 2192 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Northeast US
StillStanding1
♀ Member
Member # 40144
Default  Posted: 5:31 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good to get such a positive kick ass update!!!! You totally rock , blind. Good for you!!!! You should be on the SI poster with your bitch boots on--- taking no prisoners. I love it!

Glad life is better for you. Keep going. You are an inspiration!

I've thought about sending them a bottle of Menage a Trois.

OMG. ^^^^^this!!!!! Please please please do it.


Me: 40s BS, Him: 40s WH
M 21 yrs - 3 teens
LTA = 2+ yrs, Dday = 2/10/13, he moved out, he officially moved back in 1/25/14 and our work continues...

Posts: 713 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: MidWest
tushnurse
♀ Member
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 6:22 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh honey, do happy to hear all is well. You rock. Do me a favor and read baseball mom's post. Show her you can survive the shit storm and come out ahead.

(((And happiness)))) (cause you don't need strength)


Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 8709 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
iamsoblind42
♀ Member
Member # 42022
Default  Posted: 7:33 PM, September 17th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Did a mud run in my wedding dress I just had to share with all of you.

Yes, that is my original wedding dress. Was a blast and threw it in the trash when I was done. Truly freeing.

Just wanted to check in and tell you all that a little over 8 months later I am SUPER happy!

Kids are doing great too.

Couldn't have gotten this far without your support. Wishing you all happiness.


I'm a survivor, I'm gonna make it, I will survive, keep on surviving...

BS: me 42
WH: 48
2 kids
Married 18 years
D-day - 1/11/14
Filed - 1/16/14
Divorced 4/21/14
Walked in on WH and BF while her H watched


Posts: 209 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Colorado
Skan
♀ Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 7:47 PM, September 17th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You muddy Goddess, you!


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4926 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
Shockedmom
♀ Member
Member # 44708
Default  Posted: 7:53 PM, September 17th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That is a truly uplifting update. May take a page out of your book and take my wedding dress for a run!

Thank you sharing and glad you are all doing ok!


Posts: 64 | Registered: Aug 2014 | From: Hawaii
TimeToGo2014
♀ Member
Member # 43909
Default  Posted: 8:14 PM, September 17th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

iamsoblind (though you should change it to "iamsoawesome" - your story was the first one I read here. It was jaw dropping to say the least. Your update and pic of you in your old muddy wedding dress is pure awesome. I'm totally proud of you!!!

Posts: 108 | Registered: Jun 2014
yearsofpain25
♂ Member
Member # 42012
Default  Posted: 8:27 PM, September 17th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

BLIND!!!!! You look fantastic in that dress! Love it!!!

Glad to see you and the kids are doing so well. Truly brings a big ol tear to my eye. Couldn't be happier for you.

You my friend are an inspiration!

yop


25 years and counting of pain caused by mother's infidelity. Aftermath: 1 deceased sibling, 1 lost family, 3 lost souls.
"Each new day I am just glad to be alive and have survived all that I did." Ashland13

Posts: 2192 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Northeast US
LifeIsBroken
♀ Member
Member # 27071
Default  Posted: 8:36 PM, September 17th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

"EVERYONE KNOWS YOU SUCKED MY HUSBAND'S COCK"
Dang !

I AM SOOOO PROUD OF YOU ! You HAVE come a long way, Baby ! Have been wondering about you and now know you are doing just fine. And, the mud run in the wedding dress? The BEST ! You're a doll and don't believe anyone who says otherwise.

Glad to know your kiddos are doing well, also. You are proof positive that good things can come from the shit storm cheater spouses bring to their families. You are the epitome of SURVIVING INFIDELITY. YAY FOR YOU !


BW: 59
XH: 60
Married 34 yrs, LIBerated: 2/17/11
MOW: 50 (she said she wanted a sugar daddy; xh said, "I'M HIM!")
Actions ALWAYS have consequences. Too bad cheaters don't consider the consequences BEFORE they create so much damage.

Posts: 504 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Missouri & Massachusetts
iamsoblind42
♀ Member
Member # 42022
Default  Posted: 9:26 PM, September 17th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wish there was a like button for the comments on here. Thanks again!

BTW... I did send the wine


I'm a survivor, I'm gonna make it, I will survive, keep on surviving...

BS: me 42
WH: 48
2 kids
Married 18 years
D-day - 1/11/14
Filed - 1/16/14
Divorced 4/21/14
Walked in on WH and BF while her H watched


Posts: 209 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Colorado
risingfromashes
♀ Member
Member # 3903
Default  Posted: 9:38 PM, September 17th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow! You have inspired me. I moved and my wedding dress somehow traveled with me. What do I do with it? I cannot just throw it in the trash. No, I can do a mud run!
Never too old to learn.
I might even place first which is something for an old timer.

You rock!


There is life on the other side of hell.

Posts: 1669 | Registered: Mar 2004
mt_in_texas
♀ Member
Member # 4964
Default  Posted: 9:46 PM, September 17th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Awesome!


I just took my eyes off for a brief moment and the 4x4 hit me over the ahead again.

Posts: 507 | Registered: Jul 2004
LivinginLimbo
♀ Member
Member # 35004
Default  Posted: 6:33 AM, September 18th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

LOL, you are amazing.


BS - 62
FWH - 60
Married 34 years
D-Day 2/12/12
Doing well with R

Posts: 1046 | Registered: Mar 2012
sudra
♀ Member
Member # 30143
Default  Posted: 6:36 AM, September 18th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You are my hero. So happy for your happiness!


Me (BW) (55), Him(SAWH) (58)
Married 22 years, 1 son (19), 1 stepdaughter (27)
DDay #1 January 2004
DDay #2 7-27-2010 7 month EA/PA (became "engaged" to OW before he told me he wanted a divorce)
Working on R

Posts: 1497 | Registered: Nov 2010
jackie89
♀ Member
Member # 38271
Default  Posted: 6:53 AM, September 18th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You're awesome and really inspiring.

I always thought that you had this amazing strength, right from the beginning, you had a list, you went down that list, and didn't stop and until you were done. Perhaps your financial situation also helped knowing you would be ok without him, but regardless, it wash your Strength that got you through that. Really inspiring.

Wish you the best, and enjoy dating!


Separated/divorcing

"The Secret of Change is to focus all your energy - not on fighting the old, but on building the new" ~~Lori Greiner FB post~~


Posts: 507 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Pennsylvania
tushnurse
♀ Member
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 7:08 AM, September 18th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Congrats. You are Amazing.
I wish you much happiness. That is a great use of that old thing. Looks too big on you too.

Stay strong, stay happy.


Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 8709 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
yearsofpain25
♂ Member
Member # 42012
Default  Posted: 7:54 AM, September 18th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

BTW... I did send the wine

I really wish I could have been a fly on the wall when they opened that. Menage a Trois!! What a way t kick off their new vows. OMG too funny!!


25 years and counting of pain caused by mother's infidelity. Aftermath: 1 deceased sibling, 1 lost family, 3 lost souls.
"Each new day I am just glad to be alive and have survived all that I did." Ashland13

Posts: 2192 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Northeast US
StillStanding1
♀ Member
Member # 40144
Default  Posted: 8:24 AM, September 18th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow, blind, you are my hero!!!! I just love your spirit and strength!!! So glad you are doing so well. Thanks for checking in to be an inspiration for all of us!

That wedding dress had to be SO HEAVY with all the mud! But I guess it's just another symbol of some dead weight you carried and finally got rid of!!!! That's just awesome. Truly.

It's good to hear that the kiddos are doing well and that you and XPOS can co-parent amicably. That's the best you can do for your kids.

Way to go!!!!!


Me: 40s BS, Him: 40s WH
M 21 yrs - 3 teens
LTA = 2+ yrs, Dday = 2/10/13, he moved out, he officially moved back in 1/25/14 and our work continues...

Posts: 713 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: MidWest
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