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User Topic: I'm Special to No One
JerseyCowgirl
♀ Member
Member # 41441
Default  Posted: 9:01 AM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hit me like a ton of bricks this AM
WH#1 could not get away from me fast enough
WH#2 same thing & after escorts found a new love very quickly
My sn not spoken to me in 14 years because I grounded him for breaking curfew
My half sister stopped speaking to me for what reason I do not know
Friends abandoned me
Even my belief in HP gone when not one of any of my pleas for help were heard

So I am again taking on all the blame when I see everyone treating me this way. Guess I am just one of those people that others tend to get disgusted with and walk away. Sure wish I knew what it is I am doing to cause this.
Depression is getting worse by the minute and I have no resourses for any help.


Me: Divorced 2012
I know that when I truly love & honor myself I am at my best & most complete; and I will never settle for anything less from myself or from anyone else ever again!

Posts: 337 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: Have not decided where to land yet!
SisterMilkshake
♀ Member
Member # 30024
Default  Posted: 9:06 AM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((((JerseyCowgirl))))) I am so sorry that you are in such desperate circumstances. There are people who care. There are people you are special to. Even though we are virtual, people here know you are special and worthy and have value.

Can you try reaching out to your son again?


BW (me) 50ish FWH 50ish
Married 34 years, 3 children
d-day 3/10 LTA (4 yrs./fucking & flirting)

"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak!" ~ Homer Simpson


Posts: 9853 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: The Great White North USA
mike7
♂ Member
Member # 38603
Default  Posted: 9:10 AM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm not sure what to say JCgirl. But I know that everyone is special, even the people who make mistakes and/or bad decisions. Please don't despair.

You may have chosen poorly in your spouses and yet, you still attracted them. I don't now the background regarding your son or sister so i don't have much advice.

I think you should go to church. God has not forsaken you even if it feels that way.

In my case, I have found that when I am helping others I feel better. Perhaps you could volunteer for Meals-on-wheels and deliver food to older people who can't get out. Or you could work at a soup kitchen. When you volunteer to help people, you also meet new people.

You have worth and are a special person. You're just have a rough patch right now. Please don't despair.


BH 53
WW 52
Two kids 21, 18

DDay 1/15/2013


Posts: 542 | Registered: Mar 2013
5454real
♂ Member
Member # 37455
Default  Posted: 9:16 AM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

JC, do you realize how few people are able to live up to your tag line?
I know that when I truly love & honor myself I am at my best & most complete; and I will never settle for anything less from myself or from anyone else ever again

That is some good shit right there. You have chosen to live an authentic life. IRL, few people are really doing this.
After I made changes in my own life, I found that my circle of friends had shrunk significantly. I no longer tolerate the BS as readily as I did before, people tend to resent being called on bad behaviors. It took a while, but my circle of friends, while smaller, is much tighter and MUCH more authentic. What a process to get there though.
I like Mikes suggestions, get out, create new friends based on your tagline. It's a better, more honest life.

Strength


BH 51, WW 42
DS 23(Mine),SD 21,SS 20(Hers),DS 9 Ours, DGS 3, DGD 1 mo
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 10yrs
I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone.
― Sophocles, Antigone

Posts: 3040 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: midwest
Random thoughts
♀ Member
Member # 2959
Default  Posted: 9:19 AM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I hope this comes out right but you being the common denominator does not mean that you are unlovable.

FOO issues might be what caused you to pick to WH's and your son witnessing dysfunctional actions and reactions might be him carrying on the FOO, as well as your half sister as well.

I read a quote on FB, about people who drop you when you stop taking their abuse and disrespect, saying you've changed when the only thing that changed is you standing up for yourself.


Those three words are said too much and not enough.
Chasing Cars-Snow Patrol.
FWW

Posts: 1608 | Registered: Dec 2003 | From: Some where in New Jersey
StillLivin
♀ Member
Member # 40229
Default  Posted: 9:26 AM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

OMG Jersey,
That is so not true. You are surrounded by people that don't appreciate you, but that is their shortcoming.
You are one of the ones I've always looked for your posts.
Your personality shines through and I have never even MET you.
Just the pure goodness of your personality comes through in your posts.
You share much and you have always been kind when you posted on others problems.
Keep putting one foot in front of another.
Just knowing you weren't giving up gave ME hope in the beginning.
Figure out what it is that draws undeserving people to you and fix THAT and you will find that, once you are surrounded by people who are better people, you ARE SO special to others.


I don't need further confirmation of what a fuckwit he is. I already have plenty, thanks very much. -SBB
D: 7/2/2014

Posts: 2358 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: AZ
DeadMumWalking
♀ Member
Member # 25341
Default  Posted: 9:40 AM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Depression is getting worse by the minute and I have no resourses for any help.

((((JerseyCowgirl))))

btdt and currently on psych hold

There ARE resources, even it you have to look out to try to find them. Please phone a friend, relative, national hotline, SI member, SOMEONE, to talk it out.

Others do not define you or your worth, trust me on this.

If your son won't talk to you for getting grounded, that says more about him than about you.

You will start to find yourself, there is courage in you.

((((JerseyCowgirl))))


Me (BS), Him (WH): early 50's
3 DS: teens!!! :)
M: 25 (19 1/2 at Dday), Together 30
Dday: Dec 2008
Limbo-ish, again (after multiple S) -- weighing my options

Posts: 2632 | Registered: Aug 2009 | From: EU
tearingaway
♂ Member
Member # 28618
Default  Posted: 9:46 AM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I know exactly how you feel. It is a good thing to recognize that you are depressed. Perhaps you could make a little time to talk to your doctor about how you are feeling.

Obviously, talking with your doctor will not cure everything, but it may be a start to pull out of all of this.


Posts: 349 | Registered: May 2010
sheila0304
Member
Member # 25041
Default  Posted: 10:08 AM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I read a quote on FB, about people who drop you when you stop taking their abuse and disrespect, saying you've changed when the only thing that changed is you standing up for yourself.

This is so true. Thank you!!!!!

never could get that quote thing right

[This message edited by sheila0304 at 10:08 AM, January 22nd (Wednesday)]


Posts: 1175 | Registered: Aug 2009
Topic Posts: 9

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