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Newest Member: turdlben (45332)

New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: What part of "I don't date married men" is ambiguous?!
hurtbs
♀ Member
Member # 10866
Angry  Posted: 7:13 PM, January 27th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I list on Match that I do not date married men. Not only do I list it in my "must haves" (never married, widowed, divorced), but I say like three times: "I do not date married men. If you are married do not message me. Seriously, I will track down your wife and tell her."

What part of that says "Hey if you're married you should totally message me."


Me BW Him XSAWH
DDays 2006, and then numerous more
Divorced 2012

"In life, unlike chess, the game continues after checkmate." - Asimov
"Be patient and tough; someday this pain will be useful to you." - Ovid


Posts: 15325 | Registered: Jun 2006
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 7:23 PM, January 27th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The part where they don't bother to read your profile? Or they read it as a challenge? Or they read it and think they're SO special and amazing, it must not apply to them?

Blergh on all three counts.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25717 | Registered: Aug 2011
norabird
♀ Member
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 9:23 PM, January 27th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I hope you do track down the wives!!!!!


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4196 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
hurtbs
♀ Member
Member # 10866
Default  Posted: 9:30 PM, January 27th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I just ignore them most of the time. Got pissed today at one and just responded "sorry I don't dare married men." He responded "ouch, harsh. For the record I'm getting divorced." I just hit block. What's harsh about staring the fact that you are married and I don't date men that are married? I think ignoring that request is harsh!


Me BW Him XSAWH
DDays 2006, and then numerous more
Divorced 2012

"In life, unlike chess, the game continues after checkmate." - Asimov
"Be patient and tough; someday this pain will be useful to you." - Ovid


Posts: 15325 | Registered: Jun 2006
better4me
♀ Member
Member # 30341
Default  Posted: 9:35 PM, January 27th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

yes, there seems to be a "I'm separated; I'm not married" mindset...close cousin to the "We're separated even though we are still living in the same house"; which is only slightly removed from the "my wife doesn't know and therefore I am discreet". Not all are creeps, but the once who aren't quite divorced don't understand it is too damn early to be dating...

2 years into this dating in life's prime thing, I don't even like dating recently (like in the last 6 months recent) divorced men...

There is just so much "broken" out there and dating isn't the way to "fix" yourself people....


DDay 11/17/2010 BW:52
Divorced

Posts: 3207 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Iowa
Bluebird26
♀ Member
Member # 36445
Default  Posted: 2:13 AM, January 28th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Because they are so special that you will forget all that baggage.

Separated is not divorced, wish they would get their lives sorted first.


"Loving someone should not mean losing you. Love empowers you. It shouldn't erase you. - Thelma Davis.

Posts: 1360 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Australia
Nature_Girl
♀ Member
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 10:20 AM, January 28th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

But but but!!!!! My ex would tell you that separated IS divorced. Well, it's not married, that's for sure. And if you're married "in name only", then you're not really married. At least that's what he told me...


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - I DIVORCED HIM, I'M FREE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBOJpIwF47Y

Posts: 9821 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
Amazonia
♀ Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 6:56 PM, January 28th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

When I was doing OLD, I found that listing what you don't want, no matter what, is a complete waste of time, and often attracts those who want to prove you wrong. Oddly, it's much more effective to mention everything as a positive, like, "I highly value the sanctity and intimacy of commitment and want to be with someone else who shares that value."


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13798 | Registered: Jul 2011
better4me
♀ Member
Member # 30341
Default  Posted: 8:46 PM, January 28th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think Ama's right...very few people seem to read all of a profile...they're looking at the pictures and hitting the highlights.


DDay 11/17/2010 BW:52
Divorced

Posts: 3207 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Iowa
Topic Posts: 9

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