I know what you mean about the X's birthday. On The Princess' birthday in December, I found out that she and her boyfriend were taking my boys over to her parents' for the traditional birthday party. That really cemented the fact that she was no longer just screwing around. I had been replaced.
In the dating I've done, I've also wrestled with when to tell them about my experience (including the infidelity, emotional abuse, depression, ADHD, suicide attempt). I don't want to scare anyone off before they've had the chance to find out that I'm worth it - but I also don't want them to feel like I've pulled a bait-and-switch on them.
Please let me know if you come up with the magical answer!
[This message edited by pass at 4:15 PM, January 29th, 2014 (Wednesday)]Loyal spouse: Me; Disloyal spouse: The Princess
Two sons: Now 11 and 14
DDay: Nov 15, 2012
Separated: Mar 2, 2013 after 17 year marriage, now divorcing!
The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous