I am happy for you. This is good.
[This message edited by OnAnIsland at 3:52 PM, February 6th (Thursday)]
Married for over 15 years
2 beautiful boys in elementary school
You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them. Maya Angelou
Why was that so hard? Ugh.
Thanks bionicgal. You are brave and courageous and strong.
Now that she knows the truth however, its a totally different story. Right after it was revealed to her, she kept trying to 'like' his posts and stuff our business page, on Instagram, etc. until I asked my WH to block her, which he did. It was like she was trying to legitimize a situation she now knew wasn't. And her continued attempts at contact have put me on guard - so I have wanted to keep her unblocked, and keep mutual friends on FB, so everyone knows the truth!
Maybe she didn't know she was a homewrecker before, but she most certainly does now. So me not blocking her I feel has been a measure of protection.
Am I crazy?
Kyrie - thanks for that! I don't always feel that way. Proud of you, too!!!
I will miss putting lovely pics of H and me as my profile picture and knowing she sees it sometimes, but I feel like I should do all of that for me, and my actual friends, and not a ghost of a mistake.
So, feeling happy. (And a little scared and check-y, still, to be honest!)
[This message edited by bionicgal at 5:10 PM, February 6th (Thursday)]
I edit, therefore I am.
2) Because you and OW cannot see each other, you may end up commenting on the same post. For example: a mutual friend's post shows up in your news feed, and you and OW both comment on it. You can't see that she posted (like it doesn't exist) and she can't see that you posted (doesn't exist) but everyone except you 2 can see both posts. That weirds me out.
*Fun fact: A couple of years ago, I blocked my old boss on facebook after I found out that my coworker's husband left her for our boss. I walked off the job when I found out. Ironically, I didn't know about the A for months after everyone else because I was never on facebook and the A was ALL OVER facebook . I have been on facebook almost every day since...
(And thanks for the tip about unblocking; I am sure I will have an occasional slip up.)
The only thing I noticed you CAN'T avoid, is if a facebook friend posts a picture WITH the blocked person...you will see it.
Other than that, you shouldn't see anything associated with them at all!!
My advice is to block her immediately!! Not only is it the right thing to do (for your own sanity!), but she will also not be able to look at your page or see anything you post either.
Also...its sends a message...the right message
[This message edited by 4everfaithful83 at 6:53 PM, February 6th (Thursday)]
Together 7 years
DDay: June 24, 2013
good job!! :)
Also, I just found it important to remember that it was not an accurate picture that I was getting, anyway. The AP was my friend, so there is little chance that she was posting things publicly for much other reason than making sure I had a particular view of her. (I don't think I am narcisstic, how could it be otherwise with the affair only 8 months out?) It could of course be true that she wasn't thinking of me at all, like during the affair.
But regardless, her posting on FB is only what she wants people to see -- it isn't necessarily the truth, or paint her life in any realistic way. I was probably her top friend on facebook when the affair was going on, and I had no idea -- even when she was posting things like: "Worst day of my life," when my H tried to break it off with her.
Her name did still come up on a friend's page today where they tagged her to look at something (kind of an "ouch," as this person knows about the A, although the AP doesn't know she does.)
But, other than that, it has been great!
[This message edited by bionicgal at 12:42 PM, February 7th (Friday)]