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User Topic: Not ready for Valentine's Day
BlackIce
♀ New Member
Member # 42229
Default  Posted: 6:30 PM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

i am not sure how to go about it. on one hand i want to do something but i also don't. i don't want to ask if we are going to do anything. it's not just valentine's day but our anniversary as well so just thinking about it is stressing me out. i think i am just going to leave things in his court and see if anything happens or not.

[This message edited by BlackIce at 6:30 PM, February 12th (Wednesday)]


BS: 37
WS: 39
Kids: 3
Together: 19 years
OEA with at least 2 women in other states, now not speaking to one but the other one is lingering past her expiration date
D-Day 12-24-13
talking, working on relationship

Posts: 33 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Oklahoma
turtle72
♀ Member
Member # 21773
Default  Posted: 8:16 PM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I hear you. Our ddays are close and Valentines when it is still so raw is hard. I can't imagine having an anniversary to deal with too.

But I think you are setting yourself up if you just let it be in his court. It is really a no win for both of you situation. You will be upset with no recognition and upset in a different way if he does something too. If you read over in Wayward many are stressing about how to handle it also. Maybe if you talk about it ahead of time it will help.

We are going out to dinner Saturday. I booked the babysitter and told him to pick a restaurant - we are going out to celebrate our birthdays, not Valentines. He chose the place we got married at. Ugh! I thought it was sweet he thought of it because it hadn't occurred to me. But now I am nervous I will have a meltdown at the restaurant. I told him tonight I was concerned how I will react. He suggested going somewhere else but I just want him to know it may be an issue.

Tell him your concerns, maybe you can come up with a plan that won't hurt as much.

[This message edited by turtle72 at 8:17 PM, February 12th (Wednesday)]


Me: 41 BS/WW/BS
2 kids 9 & 11, 3 steps 20, 8 and 3
BS 1st DDay 10/14/08, 5 mo. PA w/ MOW
WW 2nd D-Day 3/22/10, my exit A with HS BF
Separated 4/19/10
Married H #2 10/8/11
BS latest Dday 12/28/13 - PA w/ single COW

Posts: 2207 | Registered: Nov 2008 | From: Massachusetts
BlackIce
♀ New Member
Member # 42229
Default  Posted: 8:31 PM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you :)
I will ask him about it. Even if we just go to a movie i will be happy. Our finances are really tight so we can't do too much.


BS: 37
WS: 39
Kids: 3
Together: 19 years
OEA with at least 2 women in other states, now not speaking to one but the other one is lingering past her expiration date
D-Day 12-24-13
talking, working on relationship

Posts: 33 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Oklahoma
Topic Posts: 3

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