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Newest Member: BlackSunshine (44978)

Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Divorce thoughts...
FracturedSoul
♀ Member
Member # 41792
Default  Posted: 11:33 PM, February 12th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Morning all,
WH and I had a mini fight last night...anyway, everytime this happens, I start thinking about divorce. Is this normal???


BS-33
FWH-33
Dating since 1997. Married since 2004.
DDay: 09/12/2012
4 OW from 2006-2012. Discovered all @ once.

Posts: 56 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: South Africa
1Emptyglass
♀ New Member
Member # 37548
Default  Posted: 12:09 AM, February 13th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Normal for me. We have been trying R for 2+ years and I still wonder if it is a deal breaker for me. Best of luck to you.


Me-BW 44
Him WH 44
OW single 54 co-worker
Married 21 years at d-day
kids: DD21 DS 17

Posts: 34 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: CA
Trying2Survive1
♀ Member
Member # 40022
Default  Posted: 12:15 AM, February 13th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Normal for me too. There are still some days I wake up and think I can't deal with the whole situation


Madhatters, M 31 yrs
FWW/BS 57-BS/FWH 56
Separated 5 mos in 07.His DDay,11/07.False R since 07. My DDay,7/5/13."Once you are real you can't become unreal again. It lasts for always.
― Margery Williams, The Velveteen Rabbit

Posts: 128 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: United States
iwillNOT
♀ Member
Member # 40605
Default  Posted: 1:08 AM, February 13th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This happens for me too...then an hour and another conversation later, the feeling goes away. I think it just goes along with the roller coaster. I am starting to get the idea that if I wait it out then usually the" everything is doomed" outlook passes. Of course, it comes back next time


Me: BS, 43
Him: WH, 44
Together 21 years
Married 14 years
Kiddos 2,6,8,10
Dday#1 2004, 3 years after EA/PA co-worker MOW
Dday#2 8-6-13, 13 months EA/9months PA with co-worker MOW - caught not confessed
Rugsweep now, pay later. Ask me how I know.

Posts: 504 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Midwest
Dreamland
♀ Member
Member # 40488
Default  Posted: 1:14 AM, February 13th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Normal for me.. Except now he is I'll so I won't divorce him. He has no family here came to this country because of me and so much history I just can't dump him while he's dying. But I think now if he were healthy maybe I would D. He loves me tells me daily he's sorry and how he fucked things up but somehow it just doesn't matter. I say I love you back because I do but I'm not in love with him. He killed that when he cheated.
:(


Me-BS 50 Him-WH 47, DD17
Together since 1993, Married 19 yrs
DDay 3/12,4/12,7/12 EA-PA OW - 25 single husband chasing bastard whore

Posts: 515 | Registered: Aug 2013
wert
♂ Member
Member # 34478
Default  Posted: 8:44 AM, February 13th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yep. Thoughts are just those...thoughts.

take care...



Posts: 1428 | Registered: Jan 2012
rachelc
♀ Member
Member # 30314
Default  Posted: 8:57 AM, February 13th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yep daily. A wise poster here says being in the "not divorcing" stage for a while is ok too.


his Dday: 2/10
my Ddays: 1/12, 4/12 broken NC 12/12

me (WW/BS): 48
him: (BS/WH)52
4 kiddos in mid 20's

Me: I didn't sign up for this.
Him: you're already in this. All you can do is resign...


Posts: 4950 | Registered: Dec 2010
million tears
♀ Member
Member # 24416
Default  Posted: 9:06 AM, February 13th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I do this too. It's just a fleeting thought now, though.


2 year LTA-double betrayal, D-day 1-26-2009 and many months of TT. 2 more recent d-days-way overstepped boundaries.

Married 27 years. Together 29.

3 children 24, 21, 14

OW sex addict and romance addict according to MC.


Posts: 1664 | Registered: Jun 2009
FracturedSoul
♀ Member
Member # 41792
Default  Posted: 9:11 AM, February 13th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you for the response everyone...at least I know this is 'normal' for us BS's.
Dreamland...I have often wondered about the loce vs in love thing...I relate to your statement today...feel like I've lost the loving feeling :(


BS-33
FWH-33
Dating since 1997. Married since 2004.
DDay: 09/12/2012
4 OW from 2006-2012. Discovered all @ once.

Posts: 56 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: South Africa
deena04
♀ Member
Member # 41741
Default  Posted: 10:06 AM, February 13th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Normal for me, too. I go back and forth sometimes without a fight, just with my own thoughts.


Me BS mid-late 30s
Him WS knocking on 40 (lovemywife4ever)
blended family with lots of kiddos
together 5 years, married 8/13
D day 12/1/13
WH ONS had been 4/12
Getting ME back and moving to HAPPY - whatever that means
I want out!

Posts: 979 | Registered: Dec 2013
Topic Posts: 10

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