As with the others, same here. He played the victim in the D... even though he got to keep all of the electronics, the housewares, the new furniture, etc etc. I just walked away with my clothes, the car and the dog.
He still owes my family several $1000 which he swore he would pay back without legal action. Has he? No.
But when something goes wrong in his life, I'll get a "poor me" email. No apology. No "hey, I know I still owe you x, y, z, but...". Nope. Just ignores it and launches right into what's wrong with him. Last one I got he actually said "no need to call [to comfort me]"... AS IF I WOULD YOU LUNATIC!
So, yes, sadly, it's something to get used to.
My IC has put it in a way that I find very useful: he can't bear feeling shame. To admit what he did to family and friends, to talk to me like a normal person, to apologize, to pay us back... any of that would involve facing and feeling shame. And that would be too injurious to his fragile ego. He has to continue rewriting and acting delusional because it is the only way for him to function day to day.
I remember about two months after DDay, a friend told me that she had called him to make sure he was okay after we S. She said he launched into a history rewrite about how he had been unhappy with me for a long time (that was completely news to me), etc etc. My friend heard him out and said he was rambling like a crazy person, totally difficult to follow... and then all she said was: "If you were unhappy, why didn't you just leave her? Why did you have to cheat on her?". He hung up on her and they haven't spoken since.
This new reality and "new" them sucks. I'm sorry ((hugs))...